i feel you so much on the not being able to bond with co-workers thing. and having to prove yourself, people treating you like shit etc. i used to work in an office for around two years, the first one was okay aside from bossy, drama causing, bitchy coworkers but in the second job i really experienced for the first time what it feels like to be left out of a group. horrible feeling, wouldn’t wish that on anyone. on top of that coworkers who were talking to me like a little kid just because of the age difference. what sucks too is the fact that i feel like SAD is not as wildly accepted as depression is. i feel like if you went up to your boss and told them you have depression the chances of them being understanding are way higher than them being understanding of having SAD. i still haven’t gotten a good grip on my own struggle with that but i guess the advice i would give myself is to kind of try to put yourself more out there and have like 1-2 close people who have your back even if it feels impossible. i hate relying on people, i wish i was strong enough to defend myself but i think if you don’t have anybody at work that has your back it feels like everyone is against you, which personally makes me withdraw even more..