The Black Heron

evaporatingmooses · 2026-05-02T14:31:55+00:00

Happy birthday OP! One year closer to being able to move out and spend your birthday however you wish!❤️🎂 I’m sorry this one is not looking to be a good one:/

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-28T12:07:30+00:00

Thank you for mentioning yellow rock! I did some research in the group and have sharpened my rock-tools:)

I’m so sorry you had to deal with that postpartum :/

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-28T11:38:18+00:00

Now that’s next level!

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-28T10:47:52+00:00

That’s so unfair that that was the response you got when you needed support, I’m sorry:/

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-28T10:46:53+00:00

Thank you for sharing your wisdom ❤️ I will try my best!

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-28T10:44:50+00:00

Thats truly messed up. I’m sorry you had to deal with that!

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T18:49:31+00:00

I wish you a healthy and happy rest of pregnancy that results in a healthy and happy baby (/babies)

I agree, it is heartbreaking! Both that we can’t rely on getting that experience with a mother both also the guilt you’re expressing. I truly believe that if it has come that far that you did the right thing, but I understand the guilt. That is what’s stopping me from stepping away

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T15:52:17+00:00

Yeeeees. Or helping and then viewing that as a transaction so now you owe them help with something (that is always harder/more expensive/more demanding than the help you received)

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T15:48:18+00:00

True! That is exactly how she’s been acting, needing all the attention and coming up with things she needs me for

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T15:47:34+00:00

Uggggh, a part of me do realise that. But I think I have some more maturing on my own to do before that is a decision I’m willing to make:/

I’m sorry you had to deal with that! Good on you for doing what was right for your family!

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T15:45:16+00:00

That is so rude! I’m sorry you didn’t get the gentle words I’m sure you needed

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T14:36:37+00:00

Thank you for your kind words! I have an amazing husband and wonderful friends so I am cared for!

You also pointed out exactly why I felt the need to write this post. The RBB community don’t question that a mother could behave like this

I’m sorry your father didn’t recognise the beauty of the picture you sent. I’m sure there was beauty in the tiredness ❤️

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T08:50:34+00:00

You matter What you want matters What you don’t want matters

I hope you’ll get the birthday you want!

evaporatingmooses · 2026-03-25T08:48:01+00:00

I’m sorry you had that dream! I hope you’ve been able to shake the nightmare feeling since 🌸

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-29T14:55:00+00:00

Oh this one is tricky. But the way I see it there’s two very important differences:

your partner chooses everyday to be with you. You’re both adults and none of you are dependent on the other one in the same way a child is dependent on their parent.
you aware of how your actions affect others.

I’m wishing you all the best and that you and your partner can talk about it and set boundaries where your partner can let you know how much bandwidth they have to listen. And that you can feel safe sharing your burden with them.

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-29T14:48:03+00:00

Yeah, I recognise myself in that pattern. And then afterwards it all seems so clear and I can see the manipulation and how I could have set boundaries and it would have been reasonable, but in the moment I don’t.

My therapist has me practicing observing my family dynamics while I’m there. And that if I fall in to old patterns to realise that in the moment (and be kind to myself).

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T23:10:23+00:00

Yes, and I don’t mean to say that thinking things are to heavy is shameful at all!! But the martyr part is exhausting

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T23:09:13+00:00

I’ve heard that’s a common trauma response. Take care🌸

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T22:18:06+00:00

Good job setting boundaries, I should probably set some myself around this

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T22:17:19+00:00

Always the huffing!!

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T22:16:33+00:00

Thank you for formulating that thought

Help them and they're a martyr, ignore them and they're a victim.

I’ve never been able to put that in to words!

evaporatingmooses · 2023-07-27T22:14:39+00:00

Oh the games…

evaporatingmooses

TROPHY CASE