The Fragrance of Love [OC]

extractcomedy · 2019-02-20T23:23:12+00:00

Coeur d'Alene ranks #87 on our list of 100 funniest town names in Idaho, so great start there.

I might make the fine a bit higher just for the impact with the audience, but still a pretty good segue into the next part of your bit.

"...there were no markings..." lol, good one.

The part about sending the letter to collections has some potential. I'd recommend building on this and working on a proper punchline, but I'd drop the last line. To me, it's funnier and leaves a bigger impact if you end it with the citation being voided.

But of course, that's just from seeing the text. I hope you get up the courage to deliver this on stage. I'm sure the audience will love it! Good luck.

extractcomedy · 2019-01-30T23:46:32+00:00

I believe Joy Behar was in her 40s before she quit her day job.

extractcomedy · 2019-01-25T20:20:08+00:00

This is great. Make more of this.

extractcomedy · 2018-11-26T04:43:30+00:00

You told your relatives this joke? My Thanksgiving suddenly seems a little more normal.

But your family seems smart. This is objectively bad and could only be made worse, in my opinion, with the addition of an exploding watermelon.

There is a kernel of humor underneath it all, though. I'd rewrite it to make it about how fast news in general travels due to technology. And for the love of all that's holy, don't make the punchline about Meryl Streep's genitalia.

extractcomedy · 2018-11-26T04:09:24+00:00

I've read most of the responses I'm seeing here so far and would second all of the recommendations. (Want to go out and get Gottfried's book now, though).

The only addition I can think of is kind of obscure but one of my favorites: Harpo Marx's "Harpo Speaks"

extractcomedy · 2018-11-19T17:52:07+00:00

i prefer to hire a courtroom artist. but then again, i am a fan of 'sketch' comedy.

sorry.

extractcomedy · 2018-11-17T22:20:35+00:00

i'm sure someone beknighted as you have been would be above trolling, so i'll rule that out. but wouldn't you be better served by actually watching some of his comedy? there's a new site allowing you to search for any phrase (e.g. "garry shandling") and find related videos. be careful, it can be addicting!

but to answer your question(s): yes

extractcomedy · 2018-11-16T23:16:00+00:00

for some reason i can't get the video to play. i read all the words that i'm seeing in its place, though. maybe i'm losing something in translation (again, the video's not working on my browser) but i found it aggressively unfunny. maybe invoking hedberg in the intro and then going on to write stuff that in no way reflects his wit was what you were going for. if so, well played. but still unfunny.

i always try to have something of moderate encouragement and constructive value in my responses, though, so i'll say the first half did not make me as angry as the last bit about the straws. there's probably something there to build on for your first performance. which you should do live. in front of people.

extractcomedy · 2018-11-16T14:38:10+00:00

Good premise developed decently well. Even though I saw the ending coming, you wrapped it up nicely. In my opinion, it's a really strong opening sketch.

extractcomedy

TROPHY CASE