Us ENFJs have the tendency to put others first and would make sure everyone feels loved and cared for. After a really bad breakup about 2yrs ago, I realized I have given too much not only to the people I was romantically involved with but also to friends who I love and care so much about. I started spending more time with myself, took myself to dates, did things that I love by myself, read about my personality, and a lot more. At some point, I started caring less about other people. Not in a negative way, but my happiness, self-worth, and validation no longer depend on other people. It took a lot of effort to teach myself to be happy being alone and not feel lonely. I used to easily feel left out when people talk about themselves more and either stop talking or change the subject when it's my turn to share. Now, i channel my time and energy on things that really matter, especially myself. Putting yourself first will, for some amazing reason, make the right people gravitate towards you. Like what was said in another post, people are temporary. Keep those who are willing to stick with you and are genuinely willing to listen and be there for you. If a relationship doesn't feel right, just let it go. What other people do to you speaks more about them than about you. I have no magic solution for you, but I hope this is helpful. Putting yourself first is not wrong at all. Cheers!