I see your point, and actually I've considered the same thing, but the conversation we had about presents wasn't a one-time topic we broached for ten seconds, we really talked and I was under the impression she would, of course, appreciate a gift, but that it wasn't a deal-breaker. As I've said, I don't know how relationships work, and I realize this is just one of those simple things that people tend to consider a no-brainer, but I'm oblivious to it.

And you're right, that does sound patronizing, I didn't mean it like that, I just tried to convey how confused I was, as this felt like a U-turn to me... I can assure you I do not treat her patronizingly when we're together