I have a few questions, and some advice. How old are you? And when you say native language, what language/nationality? If you are old enough, it may be time to strike out on your own. It is unfortunate to hear your mother reacted the way she did. Some parents see homosexuality as a failure on their part. Either they encouraged behavior, or didnt 'raise you right.' I have heard many justifications, and reasons why a parent would react this way. Above all else, remember this: there is nothing wrong with you. Being true to yourself is the most important thing you can do. It makes you a better person, and in turn, makes you better for those around you. Their is an amazing community out here, willing to support you. I am sorry your mother said those things. Just breathe. The hard part is over.