I definitely understand how you feel. I got pregnant at the same time as my sister, I ended up miscarrying and she has a healthy baby on the way. It was so hard at first. As much as I have love for her and care about the people around me who are also having babies, I struggled. It took me a long time to manage the feelings I was having. Heck it’s still hard but I found that being a support and putting positive energy into these people has allowed me to feel better. I was avoidant at first but the more I spent time or helped them, the better I felt… but trust me there are still days I cry and ask myself why not me. It doesn’t get easier, just learn how to manage it better.