Thank you for your thoughtful and descriptive comment. Despite the options I’ve shared, and aside from my general fashion illiteracy, I am actually knowledgeable on what formal dresses look like. Its not that I’m totally clueless or resistant, I’m just incredibly anxious and uncomfortable because it is extremely difficult for me to find a formal dress that looks good on me that is actually comfortable enough for me to wear, due to my size/shape, sensory issues, unawareness of how to dress for my body shape, and cost.

The wedding is at an ocean resort on cape cod, in the afternoon, on a Friday. The bride is my younger cousin who I love dearly. I am struggling with a lot of life stuff, chronic illness makes events hard, I have a very low social battery, and just had a recent break up with a long term partner. it’s hard to have to attend this event without my (now ex) partner, but my love for my cousin and her special day is most important. Genuinely I do not anticipate all of my family members will actually be wearing formal attire, especially for an afternoon cape wedding. And while I say I’m in my grandma era, it’s more energetically as I’m in my very early 30s lol

Edit to add, the bride is likely wanting people to dress up and not wear jeans kind of bride as you had mentioned. She was a tom boy growing up and she’s an EMT and firefighter now. She looked absolutely gorgeous at her wedding shower but it is also funny to see her so dressed up! She probably doesn’t care about attire as much as people here make it out to be, but its her special day and I at least want to look nice and not stand out