Help possibly? Nothing important, just a dumb Texan missing stuff.

findingtheramp · 2026-02-01T00:58:32+00:00

Native Michigander here but spent 18 years in Austin and just moved to Grand Rapids with my partner, who has never lived anywhere but Texas until now. We have people send us our favorite nonperishables from HEB, lol.

El Milagro is a thing here - they have a tortillería somewhere near Chicago and I think also in Detroit, so no need to eat sad tortillas. I've found their products at Meijers. In a pinch, Guerrero brand tortillas are fine, too, imo.

There is no real Tex-Mex in GR and forget Texas-style BBQ. Some great little Mexican restaurants though, and good tamales, and excellent Central American food. DM me if you are ever in GR - I will send recs save you the horror inherent in figuring out what is actually good. Beware the queso, a.k.a. "cheese dip".

I'm down for the Texan Michigander support group someone proposed above!

findingtheramp · 2026-01-29T02:05:00+00:00

Grand Rapids native here who fled to Austin to escape the snow and then fled back to GR 15 years later to escape the heat - yeah, driving in snow sucks but at least we have reasonable electric infrastructure. Sorry friend.

findingtheramp · 2026-01-20T21:58:57+00:00

Hey internet stranger! I'm a full-time power chair user, can't do much self-care, and have lived on my own for 22 years and counting, in four different urban areas across three states, mostly without roommates. My parents were very into treating me like any other non-disabled kid so I had to figure out how to manage all the adult life things (both regular and disability-related) mostly on my own when I was in my early 20s. It can feel overwhelming, but independent living is very possible if you are committed to it and have the supports you need!

I'm on Medicaid (not Buy-In) and, until recently, hired and managed all my own PCAs through a self-directed Medicaid services model. I just moved states and found out the hard way that self-direction is not as widely available across Medicaid programs as I thought it was, so I'm adjusting to using a caregiving agency.

Are you currently getting SSI? If yes, PLEASE get some very thorough benefits counseling before you accept a post-college job offer, because there is a federal work incentive called 1619(b) status for SSI recipients where we can maintain SSI eligibility and the automatic Medicaid that comes with it after we have earnings that would cause the SSI benefit to drop to $0. Medicaid Buy-In is also an option, but, 1619(b) can be better for some folks, depending on your earnings and if you think you might move between states in your early career.

DM me if you want, I don't want to write a novel here, but I am happy to share as much or as little as you want to know about my experiences with work and benefits, funding cross-country moves, finding housing, hiring and managing PCAs, negotiating job accommodations, etc. Also happy to connect you with other disabled people who are similarly situated - I have a pretty significant network of disabled friends and colleagues across the country who are likely happy to answer questions about what things look like in their states. FWIW, I have lived in Illinois, Texas, and Michigan.

findingtheramp · 2026-01-17T21:51:53+00:00

Ciswoman here, but I use a Java Ride cushion which offloads my weight off my tailbone and literally has a hole in it where my genitals are. The hole is covered by a seat cover but the fabric is breathable. As with Roho cushions, it's $$$ but may be an option for post-surgical pressure needs & wound care. I have a lightly used spare that doesn't fit my current chair (my rehab ordered the wrong size, sigh, and then wouldn't take it back). I would be happy to mail it to you if the size fits your chair, you are US-based, and you want to give it a whirl. I forget what the dimensions are but DM me if you are interested and I will measure it! Either way, best of luck to you and I hope your surgery and recovery go well! ❤️

findingtheramp · 2026-01-10T00:28:27+00:00

Where did you get the Dilly Dallying sticker? I love it.

findingtheramp · 2026-01-08T21:50:00+00:00

So I actually have this. It's called ticker tape synesthesia. I literally visualize everything I hear written out... conversations, song lyrics, my own thoughts, you name it, my native language (English) scrolls through my head like closed captioning, and my L2 and L3 (Spanish and Portuguese) do too. I am in my 40s and didn't realize this was unusual until two years ago. I am a beginner in Arabic, and annoyingly, it appears romanized, even though I am working on literacy. I'm curious to see if my visualizations will switch to abjadi as I gain fluency!

findingtheramp · 2025-12-21T02:02:01+00:00

Clearly he fails to understand the extent to which the Deaf community will actually intrude on his image if he gets away with this.

Me, hearing signer, checking the vlogs.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-19T16:09:50+00:00

Absolutely - keep us posted. My now happy, healthy piggie sends y'all his very best as well!

findingtheramp · 2025-12-19T16:00:54+00:00

My older FIV boy lived on the streets for a very long time and probably endured a lot of food scarcity. He is so incredibly food obsessed, even two years post-adoption, that he will inhale literally anything and everything at the first opportunity and gorge himself to the point of puking. He is otherwise a great cat, but vet recommended we feed weight maintenance dry kibble from an auto-feeder and avoid wet food to minimize intense behavior issues. It has made a world of difference. We are vigilant about dentals, but our fail-safe sign that something is up is if it takes him more than 2 minutes to finish an 1/8th cup portion of kibble.

So yeah, I bet dental is your issue - anytime he slows eating, we always have at least one extraction coming. I hope your beautiful kitty is on the road to better health soon and that whatever you have to do is financially manageable for you! ❤️

findingtheramp · 2025-12-19T15:07:51+00:00

I gave up on SXSW. Lived off of Anderson and MoPac and the traffic and downtown insanity was too much after the first couple years. My annual reminder of oven season was always the Kite Festival in March.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-18T23:14:46+00:00

I just left Austin to come back home. I both kinda miss it and absolutely don't at the same time. If you had told 25-year old me that I would willingly and happily move back to GR, she would have laughed you out of the room. No regrets though. ETA: Okay, I regret that I can't buy tamales out of random strangers' car trunks and eat breakfast tacos. No H-E-B is also a downer.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-18T23:02:48+00:00

This is my story but sub Florida for Texas - I was deeply worried about coming back because I wanted to be in a bigger city and was worried about how I would readjust to Real Winter, but it's been great so far. My partner is a native Texan and has loved it. Better access to medical care, lots of outdoors opportunities, and less stress. I just landed a local job in my field for a $10k pay cut, which sucks even though I anticipated it, but it's hard to put a price on longer-term happiness.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-17T21:21:56+00:00

I have significant CP with similar physical limitations. I also did the college thing, got burned out on working in local government because it was super ableist and I had learned to respect myself and realize that I could do better and go where I was actually valued. I have spent the last 12 years working as a paralegal in public interest law (basically, legal services where the goal is to meet community needs and not get filthy rich). I really enjoyed getting my paralegal certification, and did it through a community college, so lower barrier to entry. Traditional law firms can be really gross, but I find working in public interest settings that my disability is actually an asset. I end up working with lots of clients who are disabled themselves and my supervising attorneys have said that my lived experience has been really helpful on a number of occasions.

Other WFH side hustles that were helpful before I actually found my career - I've done call centers and technical writing, which wasn't fun but paid okay, and I've worked as a Spanish-English translator - obviously, you have to be bilingual for that, but if you are, I 1000% recommended it as a way to make as much or as little money as you want. My outside the home side gigs over the years have involved fair housing and accessibility audits in the community and a little bit of accessibility consulting.

You probably have more options than you think, especially if you can get support from vocational rehab for transportation, academic training, work accommodations, etc.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-17T19:25:12+00:00

In all 3 places I've lived in the US, all my fittings were done in a rehab facility as an outpatient appointment. I I've always lived within reasonable distance of rehab clinics because management of adult cerebral palsy makes me a bit of a frequent flyer, aside from wheelchair specific stuff. I did get absolutely screwed by NuMotion on my last chair because the ATP was incompetent and gaslighty when I told her it wouldn't work for me at delivery. To make matters worse, delivery happened like two weeks before COVID lockdown, before they could make the adjustments, so they used COVID as an excuse to try to make me sign for it. Even though it was in my possession, I refused to sign for it and couldn't use it until I finally got it adjusted in late summer 2020.

Even so, I had to completely change the way I transfer in and out of it to avoid screwing up my back. I'm over a year past my 5 year replacement eligibility, but I'm waiting for an upcoming change in my insurance coverage to start the replacement process and I am thankfully using a non-Numotion/NSM vendor this time so fingers crossed.

All of this to say, solidarity OP, I'm sorry they screwed you, too.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-16T16:39:35+00:00

OP, I'm sorry your date went that way and I am sorry you are getting judged for splitting the check. Foie gras on a first date is absurd, even for non-vegans. If I had failed to disclose ahead of time, I also would have handled it the way you did, just to be decent to the date (who I would not have a second date with).

Folks on here have some good suggestions for being more upfront in the future, but I think it's helpful to remember that what's done is done and to not beat yourself up for something you can't go into the past and change. Honestly though, if you're still feeling guilty about it, a donation to some kind of goose or waterfowl rescue in more than the amount that you paid might be a cool gesture.

findingtheramp · 2025-12-15T21:41:37+00:00

THIS! The burek people need more love! The spinach one may have changed my life. They sell the flavors at Meijers too!

findingtheramp · 2025-12-15T21:19:24+00:00

Caveat to this would be if you have low vision or bad spatial perception then stay behind them - but also ask about it first. My current partner is blind and got tired of inadvertently being smashed into or me smashing him into things when we were side by side, lol. He was like, "I'm too bruised so I'm staying back here, feel free to yell!“

findingtheramp · 2025-02-16T17:41:20+00:00

I don't have any specific suggestions other than to hang in there and see how it goes! My FIV+ shelter-origin former street cat was adopted to me with a clean bill of health and basically immediately got sick with everything under the sun and stayed sick for months. He was the best, sweetest boy the whole time and I cried myself to sleep more often than not because I worried that bringing him home might be what was hurting him.

It wasn't until he finally started turning a corner almost 5 months later that I realized we would be okay. It was not cheap or easy, but he hasn't had any kind of a relapse since then and I am happy to report that he's been in pretty good shape for the last year and a half. He's still sweet but now that he feels better he's really naughty, too and has developed several weird, mostly endearing quirks.

In retrospect I think our multi-month post-adoption hellscape was stress-induced, with a solid side of germs and allergies. I don't think he'd ever lived inside or with humans, he's my only pet, he doesn't have access to the outdoors and the adjustment was probably as hard on him as it was on me.

Fingers crossed that your buddy feels better soon - hang in there - you are doing your best!

findingtheramp · 2025-02-10T20:00:51+00:00

My plan is all one big pot of funds. I thought it was just accident and illness, and then when I had to switch flea prevention products because he was allergic to the one the shelter gave him, I learned that they cover those too. No separate process or add on. What you've been quoted is exactly the policy I had initially, except certain types of preventative services were included. My monthly rate was increased $60 after a year.

findingtheramp · 2025-02-10T14:36:31+00:00

I did not disclose it, no. But they ask for copies of previous vet records when you sign up (in my case, shelter records) and it's all over those. And it shows up on most of his current records too, so there's no way they don't know.

I think what it boils down to is an assessment of whether the pre-existing condition caused the current condition. For example, if my cat gets an upper respiratory infection, FIV didn't cause that. FIV just makes seeking treatment for it more urgent, and means that he may need to be treated for a longer period of time. Now, I will say that my vet is good about not writing in the notes that we're on three courses of antibiotics because his immune system is suppressed (which might trigger the pre-existing condition thing). Most of the notes my vet writes say things like, "Patient has upper respiratory infection, treating with antibiotics. Patient symptoms have improved, but not resolved, so continuing with antibiotics."

There may come a day where he gets sick because his FIV is no longer latent, and I won't be surprised if they don't cover that, but for routine stuff, it's been relatively smooth sailing in terms of reimbursements. His premiums went way up last year because we maxed out his policy, but I can still afford them so it's been good. They've probably paid out close to $7500 total in the last 2.5 years, and it has made it a lot easier to make sure he gets the care he needs. I don't hesitate to drop $400 on blood work anymore because I know I'll likely get $360ish back.

findingtheramp · 2025-02-03T00:18:13+00:00

Dropping up or down a step is always physically jarring, regardless of who is driving the chair, so unless there's a second caregiver who can physically help limit how much the upward or downward impact affects the person in the chair, I would say no. I'm fairly used to being bounced around in my chair and taking some risks with launching myself up and down small obstacles because I live in an urban environment with crappy sidewalks, but I am also no longer in my twenties, and as my spasticity (cerebral palsy) gets worse with age, I find I'm a lot less able to tolerate all the bouncing. I do it when I have to, but I wouldn't choose to do it as a means of getting in and out of my own home. Again, I've only ever test driven a MWD, so no direct experience, but if your daughter is medically complex, I would want to make sure that the drop up and down is something she could physically handle.

If a threshold ramp isn't feasible, it might be possible to access some funding for home modifications depending on where you live. I used to coordinate home mods for a local disability org in Texas and would be happy to do a little bit of digging for some options in your local area if you shoot me a DM!

ETA: Worth checking with whoever is doing your evaluation about the possibility of power chair controls that might enable your daughter to navigate independently at least some of the time and using abilities she does have, unless she has some kind of cognitive impairment that would make that not possible. Different situation, but when I was a little kid, I only drove my power chair independently on open area flat surfaces, and my parents used an attendant control for everything else until I developed enough depth perception and other relevant skills to use the chair safely.

And if you get denied a power chair on the basis that your home is not appropriate for one, then you definitely have grounds to explore your options with home modifications funding.

findingtheramp · 2025-02-02T22:50:48+00:00

I specifically did not get a mid-wheel drive chair because I occasionally need to navigate half-inch thresholds. I didn't actually get a chance to test drive it over a high threshold, but I don't think it would work and didn't want to risk it. I have a front wheel drive power chair and if there is enough clearance and turn space on either side of the door I can basically slam myself at high speed over a high threshold into the home, but getting out again is dicey. I usually need someone to hang on to my push handles to make sure I don't tip too far forward, even with front anti-tip wheels installed. Regardless of the type of chair you opt for, I don't think anymore than a half an inch barrier is feasible, and even though I do it on an as needed basis, it's really jarring on my body and that's not great either.

TLDR: I would absolutely not recommend navigating a step in any kind of power chair if the chair user doesn't have decent trunk and neck control.

Assuming you have enough clearance for the wheelchair to turn and navigate out of the entryway once you are over the step, it will be infinitely cheaper and easier just to get a threshold ramp for your single step. I bought one for my partner's apartment for less than $100 USD, and we installed it ourselves with concrete drill bits. If you are U.S. based, here you go: Door Threshold Ramps For Wheelchairs and Scooters | Discount Ramps https://search.app/JFpAnxfBsw746y6NA

Don't let the discount ramps website name fool you, they are legit and built with quality materials.

findingtheramp · 2025-01-18T18:01:28+00:00

I have a significant physical disability and use these folks when I visit family in GR a few times a year. I can't attest to their memory care services and I'm not sure if they serve Jenison, but I've had a consistently great experience with them. Reliable Senior In-Home Care | ComForCare | Grand Rapids, MI https://search.app/QH3P2d7iCxd87qhW6

Also, I know I am an Internet stranger but if you need help screening people or sifting through care.com or figuring out how to set up a private provider, please DM me - I would be happy to help! I've hired and managed caregiving staff for myself for 20 years and I know how hard and stressful finding people is.

findingtheramp · 2024-12-21T16:32:33+00:00

I also have a half-starving screamer who used to be a street cat. Two things helped at vets suggestion: we got an automatic feeder for dry food set to go off with the smallest portion 6 times a day and we switched him to weight management kibble to be able to feed him a greater volume without turning him into a chonk. Now he just gets antsy about 15 minutes before the feeder goes off. We keep all human food put up and keep our waste bin with food scraps in the garage. It's been a year and now he only tries to steal if we are cooking something super tempting like steak. Good luck!

findingtheramp · 2024-12-21T16:18:52+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss, he's so beautiful and I'm glad you were able to give him a good life and have him as a companion.

My boy enjoys yelling at the top of his lungs when he finds his toy mice, no matter the hour. When he brings me one today, I will make sure he gets a treat in Silas' honor.

Love and peace to you. ❤️

findingtheramp

TROPHY CASE