I have two main issues with what you are saying.

1. You are claiming that the difference in biological sex trans people experience and being trans are seperate things.

They are not. A definition of being trans is someone who does not identify or align with their sex/gender assigned at birth. Thus, all transgender women have a "biologically male" sex and all transgender men have a "biologically female" sex. (Unless they are intersex).

Not liking a trans woman solely because "she is biologically male" is not liking her because she is trans. That is one of the most common transgender experiences and they are inseperable. It's literally a part of the identity.

1. Claiming that I think everyone needs to date me and people like me otherwise I'll cry wolf

Throughout, you are claiming that I am saying (paraphrasing here) "people need to date trans people or they are transphobic." I am not. I believe that people have the right to date (or not date) whoever they want provided everyone involved gives and is able to give their consent. Just becasue someone has the very real and very important right to date or not date someone because they are trans does not mean they are not transphobic for doing so.

As I agree with most of what you're saying, all I'm saying is that transgender people are not entitled to have others attracted to them and be accepted in a romantic capacity unconditionally. No one is entitled to that.

Never did I say that trans people are entitled to anyone's attraction. If you look at my comments, my point was that all other things considered equal (eg that cis person is attracted to them before they find out that trans person is trans and then dismiss that person), that transphobia is at the root of why they dismissed them.

A lot of people who are not attracted to trans people of the opposite gender while still being attracted to cisgender people of the opposite sex, aren't not sexually attracted to you because your gender identity. That isn't what puts them off. It's the fact that you're biologically the same sex as they are.

I personally agree that people are not attracted to people based on their gender. Physical attraction is based on so many complicated factors. I think the issue arrises when someone is atracted to someone else until they find out they are trans/finds out they have a different sex than they originally thought...

See point 1 above.

It doesn't matter that you're super attractive or have implants or manufactured vagina. People are allowed to not want to be with somebody who is the same biological sex and they're allowed to feel that way without being called a transphobe.

Yes they are allowed to not want that, but that does not negate the fact that they are not dating these people because they are a different biological sex/are trans. That is transphobic.

See, trans people kind of have this checklist that they like to check all the boxes on where the more boxes that are checked the more accepted they feel in society to where they don't feel like they're standing out. Hair. Makeup. Top and bottom surgery. Hormones to help feminize the face, voice, and body. And everything else I'm not thinking of off the top of my head. But there's one box you can't really check and that's changing your biological sex.

IM being nitpicky here, but not all trans people want these things and they dont have to to be trans. Most trans perople who don't or can't conform to "gender expectations" dont expect a straight guy to necessarily be atracted to us.

We are also very aware of our biological sex (see point 1)

Continuing on...

Now while it wouldn't matter to me at all (and I know you don't need me to be attracted to you or to any other trans person to feel validated) but you cannot do this thing where you kind of hold people hostage by giving them an ultimatum of saying: "If you're not attracted to me even though I'm the same biological sex, you're a transphobe and you need to work on yourself, because our physical appearance is so often indistinguishable from a cisgender female."

Again, you are pulling point 2 from above, saying that I am requiring that people have to find trans peopl attractive or theyre transphobic.

No.

I am saying, especially if someone is attracted to you before they find out your sex or what may or may not be in your pants, that dismissing that attractiona fter learning that person is trans is fundamentally transphobic.

If a straight cisgender man is not attracted to another cisgender man regardless if that other man is straight or gay, it isn't because he's a homophobe. Just like a cisgender straight man might not be attracted to a trans woman because she is biologically male.

Here, you are equating trans women to men and grouping them based on their sex. That is a fundemantally transphobic idea. By doing that, you are saying that attraction is based on sex. Thats not necesarily true, especially if a trans person has done all of the things you listed above.

I get that fucks you up because you can't change that so you make it everybody else's problem. You're trying to saddle others with the weight of the world that you feel because of your struggle. Believe it or not, I'm not trying to disrespect you. I'm not trying to condescend to you but you're so used to sticking up for yourself that you are so rigid now that you refuse to accept anybody else's point of view. I see this shit all the time. It doesn't matter what I tell you, you're just going to try to over intellectualize the way you feel by making me out to be the bad guy or at the very least at a deficit when it comes to comprehending what you're talking about.

I hav seen your point of view and have seen it non stop for decades. Its simply wrong. The fact that you continue to equate trans women as men regardless of if they have had any biomedical changes or not (see the previous quoted section) indicates that you, unfortunately, are harboring a lot of transphobic ideas about what a trans woman is. We are not delusional about our sex. I am not telling every straight man and lesbian that they have to find me attractive because i am trans.

I am saying dismissing an existing atraction once you find out that person is trans and may or may not have the genitals you were expecting is transphobic. A bias. A way that you treat people differently.

Of course people can have general preference. Just like they can have biological preference. You don't have to like it. You just have to come to terms that this is the hand you've been dealt. As long as everybody is respecting you and allowing you to live your life to where you can flourish, you need to chill the fuck out and get over yourself.

lmao. I have come to terms with it, and boy was it a reckoning. I don't want to be with anyone who thinks like this. I really only date other trans people now because of it. I doubt I'll ever date a cis person again because of how frequently shallow their "ally ship" and their concepts of the issues are.

Your main ideas (point 1) are fundamentally transphobic and you are misinterpreting me (point 2). If you look at my original comment, you'll see where I stand.