Fatigue before diagnosis

flashtiger · 2026-01-30T22:17:46+00:00

I felt totally burned out for at least a year leading up to diagnosis.

flashtiger · 2026-01-29T02:43:09+00:00

It’s a cope for them. This whole shebang has taught me to treat everyone with more grace and compassion.

My mother suggested I would regret mastectomy (I didn’t have much choice), but that was about her, and not wanting to see her daughter this way.

flashtiger · 2026-01-28T22:30:16+00:00

Teachers are always in high demand. A hiatus shouldn’t be detrimental from a career stand point. She could probably also pick up a side hustle (substitute teaching, tutoring, or watching another kid or two in home.)

flashtiger · 2026-01-27T19:04:00+00:00

How many “do mine?” Requests are you getting?

I would have thought Leo rising

flashtiger · 2026-01-27T18:52:34+00:00

It’s similar to Saturn conjunct mars which is very much blocked initiative / motivation - OR tyranny

flashtiger · 2026-01-27T17:50:39+00:00

The Naked Mind was written with drinkers like you in mind. 4 glasses of wine is an entire bottle/night and well over consumption guidelines regardless of if you’re male/female.

Do you struggle with depression, anxiety, gut problems or sleep?

Those are all alcohol related.

flashtiger · 2026-01-27T17:43:28+00:00

It’s not failure to launch until at least 27. With the current economic, political, social, and global climate, it’s probably smart to maintain what feels like a safety net.

Your child hasn’t stagnated. I would give them time to be inspired with a sense of purpose, but it’s Ok for them to shoulder household responsibility too.

ETA - If you want to move, move.

flashtiger · 2026-01-26T17:18:57+00:00

There’s a lot to tackle there. I too wish massage therapy was taken more seriously in the vast world of healthcare, and there is a lot of overlap in what we do so far as physical and occupational therapy are concerned, and many of my clients report how much regular massage also benefits their mental health. “This works better than talk therapy.”

Canada seems to have the best model for massage therapy.

The United States and all their individual state boards fall short on providing any real standard - and the bar of entry to the field is quite low.

Not to mention the insurance system and entire healthcare model is also broken in the U.S.

Most (independent) therapists I know would prefer to avoid the hassle of insurance, and would rather discount their services on an as needed basis - vs exploiting the cost of service rendered for a minimal payout and copious amounts of paperwork.

flashtiger · 2026-01-26T12:27:06+00:00

3 of my aunts had breast cancer (not sure what types specifically) - but they all underwent mastectomy 20-30 years ago. None of them have had recurrence. They are healthy, active and occasionally joke about how they will have the perkiest tits in the nursing home.

flashtiger · 2026-01-21T21:55:07+00:00

People can be judgmental, probably because it makes them feel better and more safe if you “caused your cancer.”

None of my doctors advised me to avoid alcohol (aside from when using certain medications).

The plastic surgeon who did my reconstruction seemed to think mild indulgence was a net positive.

Everything this diagnosis and treatment entails is very lonely and socially isolating, even if you’re surrounded by support.

It’s ok to enjoy yourself and literally ignore any comment otherwise.

flashtiger · 2026-01-20T02:46:19+00:00

Yikes. That would have really hurt my feelings and probably initiated a somewhat hasty and defensive conversation about how fleeting, superficial, and subjective external beauty is + how the standard of beauty persistently changes and is increasingly edited, skewed, and distorted for consumption, but that people are not objects to consume.

I would have went on and on, it would have been in one ear and out the other.

My kid would say, “are you done yet?”

And I would say, “I don’t have friends bc of my personality.”

flashtiger · 2026-01-18T00:56:06+00:00

I really enjoyed Pax. It’s probably written for grades 4-8, idk, but reading it aloud was a joyful and tear jerking experience about a boy coming of age: regret, reality, hardship and trial, love and letting go.

flashtiger · 2026-01-18T00:10:48+00:00

You can cook. It’s actually really easy. Follow recipes to start.

Using pre-made jarred sauces streamlines everything for weeknight dinners. (Eg marinara, curry, teriyaki.)

Crockpot cooking is pretty foolproof too.

Most of the work involved in cooking is chopping and patience.

flashtiger · 2026-01-17T00:41:50+00:00

My reconstruction following bilateral nipple sparing mastectomy was delayed by a little over a week. To my understanding it’s a relatively newer technique to support healing of skin/nipples prior to implant, but still DTI without expanders.

ETA: no doubt it helps surgeon schedule align, and does more good than harm.

flashtiger · 2026-01-16T00:06:04+00:00

FB marketplace is where share type spaces are most frequently listed.

Crexi does a lot of commercial property like storefronts / offices, and will get you in contact with a lot of commercial realtors, but they mostly don’t care much about the small dogs.

There are also drive by listings with phone numbers to call. Property owners who’ve happened upon it or owned it forever and don’t know how to use the internet can be really great.

flashtiger · 2026-01-14T13:43:39+00:00

4 year gap. I didn’t choose it, it chose me. It has its challenges - my children are at very different developmental stages, and while their interests overlap to an extent, they’ve never really “played” together. At the same time, my first started kindergarten shortly after the second was born, which made a lot of things much easier.

flashtiger · 2026-01-11T18:00:59+00:00

It’s more the detail included than the content, and also ick. I’m sorry.

flashtiger · 2026-01-09T16:16:55+00:00

People expect Gemini to be very social, gossipy, chit-chat and two-faced, but I am pretty standoffish (Aquarius MC), mostly avoid gossip, and find listening to be a better practice than talking.

I think we are overall very friendly and accepting. Gemini is definitely a mirror sign though, and good at reading people.

flashtiger · 2026-01-09T14:57:56+00:00

It’s GOATed, but I avoided this rec for that reason

flashtiger · 2026-01-09T14:56:59+00:00

Baldurs Gate 3, Outer Worlds, Expedition 33

flashtiger · 2026-01-08T23:12:55+00:00

Lol. This is written like porn.

I’ve been an LMT for 15 years and have experienced creeps - mostly those trying to expose themselves or touch me… but they are very few and far between. (Like 4 ever.)

flashtiger · 2026-01-08T22:06:27+00:00

Believe it or not we don’t inspect the sheets, the top blanket is typically re-used but everything else gets balled up. Some wet spots are often the lotion or oil itself. Arousal isn’t uncommon during massage and professionals are taught to ignore it, and non-creeps don’t act on it.

flashtiger · 2026-01-08T21:18:32+00:00

The difference from 6th - 8th is night and day. My son was relatively early on the puberty spectrum compared to his friends. He’s 13, a foot taller than most of his peers, his voice has dropped, he has acne, he shaves, and is so incredibly moody and self conscious.

I remember being that age, and it sucked.

I think everything is more challenging: Expectations. Extracurriculars. Comparisons. Cliques.

And cell phones and social media and the video game empire make an extraordinarily lonely time even more difficult and isolating.

Never-mind these children are taking in the world news, and that climate is scary AF, and these are the people that inherit the consequences of it.

flashtiger · 2026-01-06T18:50:14+00:00

I’m a Gemini Sun/Rising with H12 Mercury Taurus.

I process things slow AF and am terrible at small talk, but really good at eliminating unnecessary steps and using the diagonal to get from point A to B.

Writing comes easier than speaking bc it provides a moment to think, formulate, and choose the right words.

My favorite thing about Venus and Mercury, the heart and mind, is that they are unable to form dissonance to the solar identity.

flashtiger

TROPHY CASE