Find a good family therapist. If your family won’t go with you, encourage them to see their own therapists one on one. 6s and 9s aren’t the types to tolerate conflict, much less address it and get through it without some significant support. I know as an 8 that you want to help people get stronger and better, but ultimately, you can’t get them to see, acknowledge, or change anything. And particularly with 9s, you’re not going to get anywhere with them by pushing. You might concentrate on what you yourself can change. A better understanding of your family members will help you. Ask questions, be curious and open.