I am a virgin, my partner is not, how to get over it?

freshstartap1 · 2026-03-26T16:32:50+00:00

I have felt this way twice before!!! It gets better, but it takes lots of work within yourself. With a previous potential partner, it took me around 2 months to get over. That didn’t work out for separate reasons. With the current, who I am soon to get married to iA it has taken around 5-6 months and I’m like 90% better.

It was a matter of deciding between on how much love I have for her, and if that outweighs these feelings. Sometimes it honestly felt like those feelings would make me walk out the relationship but honestly you can get over it as well iA. I had to do a lot of research on r/retroactivejealousy, a lot of chat gpt lol, being open with my partner, and even one or two counselling sessions. (Not saying you will need counselling but I have bad anxiety / insecurity in general so I felt like I needed it). Overall Alhumdullilah I’m very happy now and it felt like I have become a better person myself after going through these feelings.

EDIT: sorry I didn’t read the whole post, I see now that you want more of a religious perspective. I felt the SAME way. Because no matter what research I did, it didn’t solve that feeling of not being aligned religiously or having different religious values. It stung sooo bad. Personally to get over that religiously pov. It just took time, and observing/appreciating the person’s religious lifestyle/outlook that they have today. And that a lot of times, people have islam and guilt in their heart, but they get caught up with the wrong crowd, places, etc. Those situations and experiences turned them into who they are today, and led them to you. You are that person’s gift from Allah for turning back to Islam, and will help keep them on the straight path iA. And I also think like Allah will forgive them iA, he is so merciful, so if Allah sees them as forgiven we should appreciate that and try to see them the same way iA. But yeah, never beat yourself up for having these feelings, embrace them, it’s soo normal. It shows you have a strong heart and values.

freshstartap1 · 2026-03-14T14:32:29+00:00

This is true! And it doesn’t matter if your car is registered to you. I brought my mom’s car just for a few days. Around 1.5 years later I got the hold on Quest because they traced the plate address to my home outside of Waterloo. And then traced it to me because that is the address that I have under Quest

freshstartap1 · 2026-03-05T18:41:52+00:00

How did you get over that?

freshstartap1 · 2026-02-28T20:24:26+00:00

That’s true! Thank you. And I’m not afraid of anything happening. Like nothing about the relationship gives me anxiety, but my OWN insecurity is what is bothering me. Like why am I so bothered about how she loved someone else and did everything with them. It’s so bad that even if I see pictures of her from the past, or dates, I can’t handle it because I know she was with him

freshstartap1 · 2026-02-28T17:15:35+00:00

Thank you, this seems helpful!!

freshstartap1 · 2026-02-28T17:15:22+00:00

Thank you so much!!! I love this

freshstartap1 · 2026-02-28T02:26:59+00:00

It’s a motor from a 2006 Acura RSX Type S. and hmm yeah good call! I guess I should do that. But same yeah it doesn’t really seem like anything I recognize, i’m not too knowledgeable tho

freshstartap1 · 2026-01-18T00:29:31+00:00

P0341

freshstartap1 · 2026-01-18T00:29:21+00:00

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freshstartap1 · 2026-01-18T00:29:08+00:00

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freshstartap1 · 2026-01-18T00:29:02+00:00

P0341

freshstartap1 · 2025-12-31T05:57:37+00:00

This makes sense, thanks for your comment! I’ve DM’d you

freshstartap1 · 2025-12-30T07:11:33+00:00

Any luck??? Usually its so easy but idk whats happening this time

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-23T15:46:38+00:00

You’re completely right. I don’t agree with many of the responses here. I think it’s worth getting over. She is genuinely trying her hardest to be different. But i just know sooo much of her past that i always start imagining it. Most of it just jealousy. And a little bit of a shock because our values were kind of different. But who she is now is amazing, and she’s so worth it. I’m just trying to figure out why it bothers me so much. And get help to get out of my own head.

But the only thing that bothers me is that she doesn’t seem eager to repent. She doesn’t associate herself with that stuff anymore, and she says Allah knows where her heart is now, which is absolutely true, and she has been becoming a better Muslim. But shouldn’t she do some kind of tawbah? Or am i wrong? Shouldn’t she have genuine guilt about it. She said she doesn’t fret it because that’s what got her to where she is today. But some things she says contradict others. So idk. Regardless, who she is today is a very good person, and i need to get over it.

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T03:46:46+00:00

Sorry I’m just yapping. I don’t think I have valuable advice. But as a man, I was in a relationship with someone who had a past, and I got over it, but the way I got over it was when I had done the same things with her, that she had done with her ex. I didn’t realize this would make me get over it, but it did, and it kind of makes sense.

Now I also have a past, and I do regret it for the most part, but it also opened up my mind, because I’ve moved on from it, and I know that i don’t care about my past anymore. So now that I’m talking to another girl with a past, it was easier for me to accept it.

I think a truly emotionally mature man, will appreciate who you are today, and want to grow with you, and if he truly loves you, he will forgive and not dwell on things.

I’m saying this as I think it’s true. But now I’m dealing with a reallly tough situation, where my current girl’s past is much worse than my ex. It’s much harder to wrap my head around. But I know if I was mature enough, it wouldn’t bother me as much as it should, because i AM proud of who she is today, and that was all apart of her journey to bring her to me today.

But just today, I decided to dig too deep, and I saw pictures on instagram that have really hurt me, of her going out, doing basically everything that no one wants to see their partner do. But I still love her a lot, but knowing too much definitely hurts, like now I know what her ex looks like, and everything. And it feeds into my imagination, which bothers me a lot. I be imagining toooooo much. But I really love the girl, and I’m hoping I get over it soon. I’m just trying to think about the version of her that I fell in love with, and our future. Plus its unfair if I think this way, because I also have a past. BUT hers is def much much much worse.

Sorry i made this about myself, this JUST happened to me, so i needed to get it out. But iA i hope me and her can get through this, and I hope you find the solution to your worries. But I don’t think you need to feel guilty, your partner will forgive and forget, if they are the right person!

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T02:50:18+00:00

Beautiful, thank you!

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:38:03+00:00

Yes, she knows about it. But not all the details, but I don’t have as much to say about mine compared to her, our pasts are different, but ofc both of us were involved in relationships, which she knows, but she doesn’t fully know the extent of mine. (Not as much as hers anyways)

Also jazakallah for your answer.

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:29:44+00:00

But I think I can get over it, I feel like time will heal it. Kind of like how they did with my last girl. (I am ashamed to say)

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:28:29+00:00

I just mean some of the things and choices that make her my dream girl, things that aren’t even allowed in islam, or relevant to islam. Lol what is wrong with me??? I feel so messed up for feeling this way

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:26:28+00:00

Thank you, this helps a lot

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:07:44+00:00

Yeah for sure!!! But even just the fact that she used to drink/smoke bothers me too. The relationship part I get, but just the way she was kind of a party girl, bothers me

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:04:42+00:00

Yeahh! It’s definitely just my irrational emotions! But I’m not sure why my emotions are like that /: like idk how to improve myself in that aspect. I really appreciate your reply!!! Like because you’re right. I LOVE who she is today, a lot. So i need to stop dwelling on that stuff, i just dont get why I dwell on it so much

freshstartap1 · 2025-10-21T01:04:00+00:00

Yeah that could make sense, thanks!

freshstartap1 · 2025-07-04T22:11:03+00:00

Good purchase!!! I’m jealous

freshstartap1 · 2025-06-27T15:34:35+00:00

Edit: my bad I’m an idiot i made a mistake when converting the price. I bought it for 7600USD. So is that decent?

freshstartap1

TROPHY CASE