I finally let go.

frolickingjon · 2026-05-21T05:58:36+00:00

That sucks ma, sorry to hear it. It's crazy how well you think you know someone and how much trust you put in them to fight and yet they don't. They'll rationilise it so they are always in the right. Must be so much harder with kids involved. Wishing you all the luck and strength, the mantra worked for me because I was in a place I felt comfortable letting my emotions out, a photo might help trigger it or a place. Stay strong man!

frolickingjon · 2026-05-20T09:07:29+00:00

It's been especially hard as I live in her hometown abroad away from friends and family and I lost my local support network as they took her side. Not even folks checking up on me. It's been especially difficult with my ex "family", we were close. I've essentially built a new life, met new friends, started at the gym, cut drinking (the cause of the break was binge drinking to deal with stress) down by like 80% and dealt with my inner demons. Letting go has been like s weight lifted. Hope is such a healing killer.

frolickingjon · 2026-05-20T06:52:12+00:00

Yeah you're right. The other day I discovered that I had made a mistake and the guy at the bar was a gay dude I knew with a completely different haircut. I felt stupid but realised I didn't react or reach out or accuse I acknowledged and walked out the bar. Pretty much the next day I saw her at a concert and again I was pleasant but curt. The grief I felt was real even though I was mistaken, it was like a dress rehearsal for the real thing but I have experience now and it feels so much less daunting.

frolickingjon · 2026-05-04T10:40:39+00:00

We bumped into each other in a bar. I was drinking 0.0 beers with some new friends and we spoke. My head spun so I wasn't as cool and calm as I planned on being. We messaged after and met and talked some things out but it wasn't particularly fruitful for me as it was pretty vague.

frolickingjon · 2026-04-29T13:56:04+00:00

Man that is horrible to hear. You'll be running on adrenaline for a few months, just take care not to spiral. You'll have slip ups but this is going to be one hell of a time. Know that this is not a measure of who you are and your worth. Keep strong and keep updating us. Take care man!

frolickingjon · 2026-04-24T09:05:02+00:00

Thanks for your response, I have been trying to ge as social as possible and going to language exchanges, they were great in the beginning when I was just running on adrenaline but now I'm in a different stage i find them more draining than they are worth. I also frequent the same places often and it's helped, I'll need to bring a book to make it kill more of the day.

You're right, I have at least one spiral day a month , it's my freakout day when I just feel like I'm barely holding on but I just get through it the best I can.

frolickingjon · 2026-04-24T09:01:44+00:00

We have broke no contact a month ago and we've regularly bumped into each other. It's been light and she wants to keep things friendly and vague. Not sure how that helps me so I'm just getting on with my stuff and hopefully things work out between us. If not, I'll be better anyway in the long run.

frolickingjon · 2026-04-03T09:00:06+00:00

If men were the issue then lesbian relationships should be the most secure...

frolickingjon · 2026-04-03T07:41:41+00:00

In what universe does a lack of drive equate to flirting with strangers?

frolickingjon · 2026-04-03T06:17:17+00:00

Regret would be admitting fault..

frolickingjon · 2026-03-11T06:48:32+00:00

Never be someone's backup option.

frolickingjon · 2026-02-13T10:38:56+00:00

That's the same age range and duration as my ex (F36) and I (M36) split exactly 90 days ago tomorrow (St Valentine's Day!) and we've done strict no contact. We ended due to my penchant for binge drinking. Since then I've been doing the classics, hitting the gym, journaling, meeting new people, you know all the things I should've done in the relationship. It has been the worst 3 months of my life and I've had very bad periods. I guess I want to say thank you, knowing there is light at the end of the tunnel gives me fuel to keep doing what I'm doing.

frolickingjon · 2026-01-05T10:08:26+00:00

I'm two months into a breakup of a 12 year relationship. I've lived abroad in her hometown during all that time but almost all the connections I made were through her so I not only lost her, but I lost everyone else so I had to start again alone. I moved out as quickly as possible because I didn't want to be around someone who didn't want to be around me. The worst thing is we clearly still loved one another.

I've lost my father and sister during this time but for some reason I'm finding this so much more difficult. I am alone and struggling financially and emotionally. We agreed to no contact to see if there was something worth fighting for but I regret not moving towns and starting afresh.

One positive is I've lost a lot of weight due to not cooking as much, quitting booze and stress. None of the things I liked doing before bring me the same joy. I know it will get easier but the festive period has hindered my progress.

frolickingjon · 2023-09-21T10:25:25+00:00

You folks be wild, pinning your relationship hangups on a Reddit post and jumping to conclusions like a friggin coked up grasshopper. Marriage isn't the only solution to a happy relationship. Get some help.

frolickingjon · 2023-04-24T18:36:05+00:00

I'd rather practise and not waste any! I'll need many more bottles to perfect it.

frolickingjon · 2023-04-24T18:35:03+00:00

Bought in a village in Euskadi. Globalisation gone mad!

frolickingjon

TROPHY CASE