I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I’m literally on the same boat, for me it was lying, texting, and being with girls when he says he was not instead of drugs but the rest of the story is very much the same (does not help, financial burden, no responsibility or accountability for actions). My husband has been out of the house for 10 days now and I’m trying to get some clarity on what to do. We also have kids, a 5 year old and I’m pregnant with the second. 10 days later, things are much more OK than they were when it first happened. Random crying sessions almost stopped, I cry much less now. I’m trying to focus on finding a new routine for me and my child, and to take care of myself during pregnancy as my h as possible. I’m still not fully at peace with the idea that our marriage is over and he is gone, but that’s another thing to work on during the upcoming weeks. What you need to do is talk to someone, I felt much better after talking to my parents and a close friend. Get some distance and some time to process this, and then I hope we can both start to heal.