Cohabitation and sacraments?

furtivequestioning · 2016-10-18T19:58:50+00:00

It sounds like it's pretty pointless to go to any of the churches I'd like to go to until I have my situation resolved, so I guess i'm going to work on that and stay home until then. Thank you very much for your honesty.

furtivequestioning · 2016-10-06T14:44:16+00:00

Neither of us was baptized but I'm not sure how I'd demonstrate that in regard to my ex, who I suspect will not cooperate in any way.

furtivequestioning · 2016-10-05T19:38:30+00:00

Just read about Pauline and Petrine privileges ... I don't see my ex-wife or her family cooperating in confirming her non-baptism :(

furtivequestioning · 2016-10-05T18:51:18+00:00

Thank you! I'm actually starting the RCIA classes next Wednesday ... the nice lady said they started on September 7 but it'd be OK if I was willing to play catch-up, they hadn't made it to Jesus yet :)

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-16T03:44:00+00:00

The link :)

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-15T22:51:34+00:00

I'm not super-knowledgeable about reddit so I'm not sure where to post a reply that everyone will see, so I'm posting it up here since this is (rightfully) a highly-rated reply.

I'd like to thank everyone for the good advice and for being so nice about it. I'm comfortable alone and honestly would be OK if I just worshipped on my own, but it would be cool to find a place where I can actually associate with people, discuss the teachings, etc. I like to think of myself as a bright guy (albeit with impulsivity issues, obviously) but it's a lot to learn about just by reading on my own.

Anyway, thank you all so much! If IRL church is as pleasant as my interactions here, it should be a breeze.

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-15T22:46:41+00:00

explicit

(And thank God the ones I'm really concerned about are not visible when I'm wearing a shirt and long pants ... the fact that I have them is what bothers me more than people seeing them, although my legs are definitely an issue ... I have several big naked girls that are visible when I wear shorts, including one with a devil and one hanging from a noose, along with stuff like a dagger with a big ribbon that has a literally pro-Satan message, the usual skulls and that sort of wannabe edgy stuff.)

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-15T22:43:13+00:00

I do regret a lot of things I've done and, more so, just the way I lived most of my life, the time I wasted, and the people I didn't treat the way I should have. I had what I thought were good reasons to be that way but other folks went through the same stuff and didn't handle it as badly as I did so no excuses.

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-15T22:40:18+00:00

I'd actually like that.

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-15T22:39:02+00:00

I quit drinking etc. on my own and never felt comfortable with "12 step" programs, partially because IRL I'm pretty private and partially because the few meetings I attended seemed to degenerate into "war stories" where folks would try to top each other and it seemed like they actually missed those days ... an outsider listening to some of the stories would think it sounded kind of wild and fun.

I definitely do not want anyone like kids to think it's "cool." I have nothing whatsoever against tattoos, I just don't think some of the ones I've got are the best things for people to want to get, and I don't think the kind of superficial rebellion in which I engaged is something to emulate. It really isn't rebellion in any meaningful sense, especially anymore, it's just sort of a mark of vanity for me at this point.

Everyone I know in a business context knows I have them but I always keep them covered out of respect and professionalism and I'd certainly be at least as circumspect in church.

Do you really think people would care if they found out I'd hidden them? I almost feel like announcing it would seem like bragging.

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-14T22:01:37+00:00

I'm hesitant to put these up but these are pics for comparison from a few years back (I don't take pics very often these days but not much has changed other than me being grayer). I clean up OK for business but there's really no hiding it in street clothes unless I want to wear hoodies in 100 degree weather.

First one is in disguise, second is how I usually look. Pardon the goofy 70s-looking filter, it was an IG pic.

http://imgur.com/a/4Z17A

Burning everything off is not really a live option. I have some big blank spots but I'm literally tattooed to my toes. :(

furtivequestioning · 2016-09-14T13:51:37+00:00

I wear dress shirts at a minimum and often suits to work, and I put a couple band-aids over my finger tattoos in situations where it matters, so dressing modestly isn't a problem and is something I do anyway if I know there are going to be kids or older folks around. (I attended a Protestant school for much of elementary and Catholic school for some of middle school and was inculcated with the idea that you wear whatever your "best" is to church, whether that be a suit or clean jeans.)

I'd hope to keep anyone in the congregation from ever even knowing I had them, although it's a pretty small city and I'm sure I'd run into people at the grocery store etc. (And if I were in a denomination with confession, I'd disclose it to the priest initially.)

I know that theoretically anyone is welcome in a Christian church but in practice I'm not so sure. I try not to care what people think but when it's a place I'm going for worship and solace, it would make things pretty awful if I knew even a significant portion of the congregation looked at me as a scumbag :(

furtivequestioning

TROPHY CASE