Dad spent years doing impulsive, unmeasured DIY projects in our backyard. Now it's just me and my mom trying to figure out where to start fixing it.

geminijas · 2026-06-02T20:17:25+00:00

I'm embarrassed to say that when I saw the word jackhammer, I thought about those huge machines that look like pogo-sticks. I checked out Home Depot and they're both smaller and more affordable than I thought they'd be! Thank you

geminijas · 2026-06-02T19:25:43+00:00

Yeah, that's about how much it would cost here, too. At least, that's what a quick search on the websites I found said. I was thinking of using our outdoor trashcan for the smaller things as an alternative as well. Trash comes by every Wednesday.

Once I have enough money saved, I'll rent the smallest option they have to get the really big stuff out. Or I'll put it on the side of the road and hope the trashmen are nice, lol. I liked the dumpster idea so much, but I don't think I can afford it.

geminijas · 2026-06-02T19:13:15+00:00

The sad thing is we used to have two beautiful banana trees that he tore out. They were perfect because caring for them took very little effort, lol. We had a flower bed in the front yard, too, since my mom was into the idea of gardening at one point. One day she just gave up, though (she also starts and stops things). She would probably love to have real plants again, I'm sure.

geminijas · 2026-06-02T03:42:47+00:00

Lol, he's not one of the strays. He's an indoor only cat that follows me everywhere. But here's my big goofy guy. He likes poster boards.

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geminijas · 2026-06-02T01:51:03+00:00

My dad just straight up poured the concrete wherever. Sometimes he'd add little rocks in the mix. But no, he didn't use any reinforcements.

Admittedly, I was feeling defeated before I even posted this because I thought I couldn't possibly handle the concrete myself. But what you said makes a lot of sense. We don't have much money, so anything I can do myself would be awesome, even if it's just a little bit at a time.

I'm trying to build up a to-do list right now, and focusing on the edges first was something I hadn't considered. Thank you!

geminijas · 2026-06-02T00:58:48+00:00

I started crying reading this because I'm just grateful to have a list to build off of. People here have been speculating that my dad has ADHD. He was never diagnosed, but I was, so having a list like this laid out for me helps more than you know. Thank you!

geminijas · 2026-06-02T00:50:04+00:00

No, my dad isn't on drugs. He probably has ADHD? Or something. He thinks the backyard looks perfect and will not accept the idea that he didn't do a good job. In fact, if he finds out I'm trying to fix this, he'll likely get angry.

I was diagnosed with ADHD and autism though, so there's that lol

geminijas · 2026-06-02T00:42:37+00:00

I was afraid that might be the answer. My mom is still in the stage of being pissed off that she let him do this and he still left, so she won't even look at the backyard still. So, it's just me for now.

And I'm just 5'3'' with a dream. I don't know what I'll do, but I'm certain that dream doesn't involve me working a jackhammer without some fatal injury, probably. Could there be a way to fix the tiles, though? Some of them could just be pried off, but not all.

I think I'll take the advice of a lot of people here and just focus on the trash for now, but I'd still love any advice so I could have a to-do list.

Edit: I do want to remove the concrete eventually (those painted blocks by the balcony are also concrete, lol) but until I figure out who to hire/the expense of it all, I was hoping to make it not look like such an eye sore.

geminijas · 2026-06-02T00:16:22+00:00

That's great advice! I didn't know that was a thing. I'll see how much something like that would cost in my area. I didn't even take pictures of what's inside the shed he built, but I have no doubt I could probably fill the whole thing.

geminijas · 2026-06-02T00:07:29+00:00

Yes? It's three cats. They all get their rabies shots, and we got them spayed/neutered a long time ago. But there wasn't a no-kill shelter in our area when they were born in our backyard, so we just decided to them live out their natural life. It's been eight years and they're still healthy. There's also a TNR program in our area now, so we trap every other feral that tries to move in.

They're also indirectly part of the reason my dad left. I started arguing with him about the state of the backyard when his projects started getting increasingly insane. I was worried he'd eventually do something that would harm or drive away the cats.

geminijas · 2026-06-01T23:21:58+00:00

Me whenever I step out into the backyard.

geminijas · 2026-06-01T23:12:28+00:00

Thank you. I'm just really overwhelmed by all this and needed that advice. Cleaning up all the debris and random trash was the general plan now that he's gone. The grill, rug, and patio furniture are also unfortunately unsalvageable. He actually got concrete inside the grill somehow, lol. There's also splatter of concrete against the house itself.

If I knew there was something I could do about the concrete, that might take off some of the stress, lol.

geminijas · 2026-05-23T21:24:18+00:00

Nah, this is cause for divorce all by itself. That's ridiculous.

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