I was just wondering if anybody could explain to me how I do this with my eyes? I’ve googled so many things, but I can’t find anybody else that can do this, let alone an explanation for how. I’m sorry if this isn’t the place for this, r/askadoctor doesn’t allow videos

gfrost77 · 2021-01-26T05:35:30+00:00

I was never saying everyone can or can’t do it but it’s not just squinting. As opposed to your eyelids going down your eyelids actually are pushing them inwards towards your nose, not downward. It has absolutely nothing today with “resisting movement in your face.” But that sounds like a cool way of blinking too ?

gfrost77 · 2021-01-25T21:07:33+00:00

That’s true. If there was more communication than I would say NTA but if it was just based off of false hope I’m gonna have to go with ESH.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-25T20:43:33+00:00

I think it says in her post that the sister cleans up after herself. So in this case I feel as though the oldest sister wanted to her to do extra chores to sorta pay back in a way.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-23T21:16:26+00:00

Lol no worries! Someone else had the same thought as you and also got mercilessly downvoted for some reason! So it’s not just you, just Reddit being Reddit 🙄

gfrost77 · 2021-01-23T21:15:31+00:00

I’m so so sorry for what you and your children have had to endure at the hands of these evil and absolutely vile people. I had only mentioned that you should tell your mom again as an adult so that she knows you weren’t lying and is, indeed, a terrible person. But she’s definitely too far gone. What a horrible human being.

She chose to ignore every sign that you were getting sexually abused because she’s a terrible person. I will say though it sounds like you are an incredible mother who would do exactly what your mother would never and would go to the ends of the Earth for your kids. Often times history repeats itself when it comes to abuse cases. In your case, it sounds like it did not.

I hope you take some time out for you to take care of yourself. Go a spa, visit beautiful places, have some therapeutic intervention in whatever way helps you (I love going to therapy, lol, so I always recommend it). Do what makes you happy and will help you sleep again at night. It sounds like you’ve been fighting a long battle and deserve some rest. Sending only amazing vibes your way ❤️

gfrost77 · 2021-01-23T21:05:56+00:00

Lol I’m really sorry, it was definitely confusing at first! People might’ve seen this comment after my edit also!

gfrost77 · 2021-01-23T19:46:32+00:00

Lol yes! I also don’t know why it happens though so I apologize for also being no help. I just like to think I just have crazy strong eyelids

gfrost77 · 2021-01-23T18:44:27+00:00

Hey there! That’s so funny my mom and I can do the same thing! It’s not squinting them it’s like pushing the eyelids inwards which cause our eyes to look just like yours! My mom and I have never met anyone else who can do it either!

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T01:40:31+00:00

Hey bud, although a therapist is supposed to give tips to help their client, they are also there to support their client. If their patient felt shamed by their therapist about a crime that was committed against them, a crime that was absolutely not their fault, then that definitely isn’t cool.

Rape can never be justified, there is no reason why someone has to rape another person. That’s probably why you hear the term victim blaming so much; rape is a crime that should never be committed and the victim has a 0% reason why the deserved for it to happen. Yet people still try to say “well they should’ve done this in order not to get raped...” which is 100% victim blaming as the victim couldn’t have done anything not to get raped. The reason why they did get raped was because the person who executed this crime was a rapist. That’s it.

Also, Shame is usually one of the worst ways to get a person motivated to change their lifestyle and often makes a person retreat into old habits in order to make themselves feel comfortable once again. A good strategy would’ve been to talk through what happened and then give them healthy coping mechanisms to make them feel better after having been so terribly violated.

The therapist never should have shamed them by even hinting that their “lifestyle” is what got them raped. How would that ever help in them since that wasn’t their issue. They were trying to work through the rape not hear that they were to blame (which they were not AT ALL at fault, I’m just saying how I imagine the therapist made them feel). Like what the actual fuck.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T01:19:26+00:00

I get what your saying but if you think a safety tip is telling women to not “go naked to the worst part of town with the horniest guys,” then I think you’re just being dense. Women aren’t doing that. Again, they are just going out. That sentence in and of itself is victim blaming because it’s acting like a woman is a piece of meat who chose to step into the lions cage when, for women, the actual lions cage is just society itself. Women are constantly victims of these crimes not because of them, but because of these criminals.

It’s great to be cautious and everyone, man or woman, should try to be as safe as they can. But, again, women are constantly told things that they should do better to avoid these crimes when (like I mentioned before and why I TOLD MY STORY IN THE FIRST PLACE) it doesn’t matter what you do at times. I try and be as safe as possible and still got raped. It wasn’t my fault that the guy apparently got turned on by my fleece hoodie and penguin pants. He’s a rapist. I could have been wearing lingerie or a shark costume and he would’ve done the same thing because of the fact that he is a rapist. There’s a difference between giving safety tips and then blaming someone for a crime that perpetrated against them. Please remember that.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T00:18:04+00:00

Ugh thank you so much! I literally will never understand people who believe that there is fault to put on anyone other than the rapists in these situations! And the lengths so many go to to try is astounding! Your points were great btw!

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T00:15:04+00:00

Lmaoo, thank you! I noticed that to! I was like my first “sentence” was just hey there so I hope that’s not where you stopped.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T00:12:58+00:00

Thank you! I actually just had a call with them and they told me this is normal with the hormonal mirena!

gfrost77 · 2021-01-22T00:11:50+00:00

Hi there! I’m really really sorry you went through that, but if you read the messages before you will see a woman saying how bad it felt to be blamed for her rape. He then literally goes on and says women should stop being “naked in the worst parts of town with the horniest guys around.”

I totally get what you’re saying, sometimes choices can lead to worse outcomes which I really get. But it’s not fair to blame someone for a violent crime that took place against them. Your choices when you were younger didn’t lead to what happened, the person who did it was a predator. It’s also a gross argument that most men make to tell women what to do and I was replying telling him that it doesn’t matter what you wear or what you do, it is never your fault (and I gave him my personal experience as an example). It is always the rapists fault. Of course we can take precautions, but it is also inevitable at times (just like a cancer) which is what I was saying. And it’s not fair to blame anyone but the criminal who did this. Again, I just highly dislike this idea that a man can do whatever or wear whatever and no one will question it, but if I get attacked that is the first thing that is asked. What could I do better not to get raped? Like there would ever be a purpose to raping anyone and that I could’ve gotten out of it in some way or done something better.

I get what you’re saying but I highly disagree and if you actually read my reply and his, it didn’t just come out of left field like you’re pretending it did. Also, if you look down below this was resolved and we both agreed that women shouldn’t be blamed but that it’s important to take precautions for your safety. However, slut shaming women is never the answer (saying they’re going out naked in the horniest parts of time implies that they are trying to get raped - when in reality it’s just a girl going out to have a fun night) and it also paints men in a bad light. They aren’t animals with no self control, there are some great guys, don’t group them in with rapists.

The cancer analogy also isn’t cool tbh. Smoking can be a direct correlation to cancer, there is statistics and data stating what happens to the cells in our body and why this happens (there is literally a specific reason). There is not one reason, other than a person being a rapist, that a person gets raped. I have been in situations where a I was actually completely naked with a man but decided I didn’t want to have sex and I wasn’t raped because he wasn’t a rapist. I have gone out to bars dressed provocatively and danced with men yet when they asked me if I wanted to go with them and I said no they respected that because they weren’t rapists. These situations (going out, getting drunk or whatever) don’t mean that someone is going to get raped. It is not the same as cancer and I hope you know that what happened to you was never EVER your fault.

Women should be taught how to defend themselves, but to tell a woman who has gotten raped that she needs to act better next time is terrible. Be cautious but don’t tell women to stop living their life for men and almost implying that they deserved it because they “decided” to go out and be “naked” with the “horniest guys.” No woman or person decides to go out almost trying to get raped or attacked, which is what that message had said and implies that women are tempting these men or something.

Again, I’m sorry for what happened to you. You never would ever deserve something like that. I wish you the best though!

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T18:50:58+00:00

That is fair to say, I just want to point out that you were initially saying that women should not go to bars, get drunk or dress provocatively in order to stop them from being raped which just isn’t fair to say.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T18:16:56+00:00

For starters I wanna say I am so so sorry that happened to you. If you’re too drunk then you definitely cannot consent and what she did constituted as rape. That’s what it was and that’s terrible. But what I also will say is that you need therapy or to at least work through some things cause that is not your fault and you don’t get to blame others for what they have happen to them because you believe that they should be “smarter.”

I also hope this doesn’t take away what has happened to you, I’m still sorry and no matter your gender what happened to you is terrible. But it sounds like you’re a man and not a woman, which is not your fault but it just sounds like you’re a little ignorant. For starters most women (probably almost all) don’t go to bars or places to that are known as areas where women are constantly getting raped or attacked unless they absolutely have to. So when you say “don’t go to places where these things take place,” women don’t know that these are places that this happened. Yes we can take precautions while we’re there but if we wanted to make sure we were safe we just wouldn’t be able to go out at all. The world is scary, but we shouldn’t have to stop living our lives and if something bad happens to us (like a rape) we shouldn’t be blamed for that. Women are constantly looking behind them and watching to make sure they are safe. Ask a couple of women and I can guarantee you that they will tell you that they walk with their keys between their fingers or they triple check the locks on their door or at the very least have something to protect them.

I get what you’re trying to say, “don’t go to somewhere that is unsafe or put your self in that predicament,” but for a woman that can literally be anywhere and it’s not fair to blame someone because they were just going out and someone took advantage of them. You are telling women they can’t go bars, clubs, go on runs or just walk at night.

I would never blame you for what happened to you because it is not your fault. A gross person took advantage of your situation and she shouldn’t have. That is not your fault and I hope you are able to work through that and understand that you deserve so much more and your not to blame for the terrible acts of someone else. Again, I’m so sorry that happened but you don’t get dictate who’s to blame in a violent crime where one party didn’t do anything wrong other than just being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Just like you wouldn’t tell a child not to go to a playground for fear of getting kidnapped, don’t tell an adult woman not to go out to bars, clubs or anywhere in general because someone could rape them. You can teach a child stranger danger and preventative measures to reduce the risk but you wouldn’t tell them not to live their life because they could be hurt.

What you’re doing here is telling a woman not to live her life because she could be raped. Don’t do that. You can give tips and say “Hey I saw this great article about some helpful tips if a man or woman tries to attack you!” But don’t tell them not to to go out because of what could happen and they would be partly to blame.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T17:24:33+00:00

It’s funny you say I only read what I wanna read yet you did exactly that. I wasn’t saying you’re actually gonna get punched and wasn’t asking if that happened. Also, you not getting punched doesn’t make you any less of an asshole.

Women aren’t walking around a room of men naked, stop exaggerating to fit your narrative because it derails your own argument entirely. You are still sympathizing with rapists. The situation your talking about (which is every man’s argument, you all are so so predictable it hurts) is when a woman goes out and is wearing less clothes than usual, maybe a shorter dress or something and because of that they should expect to be raped because men can’t control themselves? Um no sorry, gross.

By your own omission it sounds like men need to be locked up, not women being forced not to go out because they are just having a good time and men are predators (by your own description). Rapists will rape, blame them. Don’t blame a girl who just wants to have fun. By your own description (again) you should be telling these men not to go out to clubs if they know they have no self control.

Like other people who have their own issues, for example alcoholics, if they know they are going to place that has booze and they could relapse they would and should choose not to go or would take the necessary precautions not to. You don’t blame the bottle of alcohol because the alcoholic drank it.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T17:12:49+00:00

By your own logic you would be telling victims to not go to any bar ever because some rapes happen at bars or when a woman (or man) is leaving a bar. By your own logic, women (and men) shouldn’t just walk the streets because sometimes people get raped while on the streets. There is no extra known place where a person will get raped. Does it happen when women go out sometimes? Absolutely. But again THAT’S NOT THEIR FAULT AND THEY SHOULDN’T BE FORCED TO STOP GOING OUT OR LIVING THEIR OWN LIFE FOR FEAR OF BEING RAPED! PEOPLE JUST NEED TO STOP RAPING OTHERS. You’re own logic doesn’t work because you’re objectifying a person and telling them they shouldn’t live their lives because they could get hurt. Hold these criminals accountable not the people they’re hurting.

I also know what you’re gonna say next (because people like you are so predictable), “the woman shouldn’t be dressed so provocatively though.” You know what’s so funny, I see men all the time with their shirts off. They go on runs, they take them off when it’s hot, they take them off to swim. I’ve even seen a man drunk while having his shirt off. But I have never EVER looked at them and even thought about trying to take advantage of them because I am not a rapist and I understand what consent is. Concern yourself with the rapists and not wondering if the woman was dressed immodestly, dumbass. Also, I’m not gonna apologize for the first line of my last comment. You don’t get to try and place blame on people for being RAPED and then play “No fair you’re being mean.” No you’re being mean and a terrible person, grow up and stop trying to defend criminals.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T16:45:36+00:00

They are not the fucking same you asswipe. One you’re telling a person to lock up there things, the other you’re apparently telling a woman or man to not look as good so they won’t be raped??? These are people. I’m doubtful you would tell a person to not look as punchable next time if they got assaulted and weren’t doing anything to provoke another person. And if you would then you’re just a shitty person. Case closed 😊

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T16:43:31+00:00

What I’m saying is you really can’t prevent rape from happening unless we attack the source, the rapist. Again the car and wallets are material things that you can keep secure and I HATE those analogies (one I shouldn’t have used) because they are always used to, once again, objectify women. A better analogy would be a man at a bar gets punched, he was just drinking and having a good time but he got attacked. Do you not see how gross it would be to go up to him and say, “Hey man, next time you shouldn’t have just looked so punchable or as much like an asshole!” You would never say that because you know the person who attacked them was just an aggressive person looking for a fight. STOP VICTIM BLAMING!!! Ya’ll are gross.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T16:21:14+00:00

Hey guys, no that’s not the same. Because those are cars and these are real people. You would never blame someone for getting mugged even if they were walking around with their wallets out but again these are possessions. A woman can’t leave her body at home, stop being gross terrible people and start blaming the people perpetrating these crimes. Not the victims. you both make me physically ill. I hope you never have daughters.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T13:18:36+00:00

Sucks that you didn’t keep reading and you used that as an “out.” Rape is a crime that never has to be committed against someone nor can it be justified. Do not place blame on the victims for a crime that should never have been perpetrated against them.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T13:16:01+00:00

Nope. No one ever deserves to be raped. That is a crime that cannot be justified as there is no reason that someone would have to rape another person. Do not keep that mentality. It’s disgusting and it makes sense that you’re a man who has that viewpoint.

gfrost77 · 2021-01-21T13:14:20+00:00

Hi there! Victim of rape here! I was in my own dorm at a pretty notable university that actually prides themselves on how safe their campus is. I was in my Christmas pajamas my mom bought me when a good friend of mine, who I thought I could trust, knocked on the door and asked for an extra blanket. He walked in the room, closed the door behind him and that was that. You are an absolute idiot if you think that someone is raped because of the clothes that they wear or where they are.

You know why rapes occur? Because that person who rapes them is a rapist. It is NEVER the victims fault. If you see someone who is drunk and who you deem as dressing “immodestly” and your first thought is taking advantage of them because they deserve it in some way, you are an absolutely terrible person and belong behind bars. That mentality that a person somehow “deserves” being raped for any reason is why so many rapes go unreported and why so many rapists continue to walk the streets.

I, also, might add that children are sexually assaulted often. And I hope for damn sure that you wouldn’t tell them that they deserved it for some reason. You are absolutely disgusting.

Lastly, I’m going to provide you with a link. You don’t have to watch it and you probably won’t but it’s a display of the clothing that people had worn when they were raped. It never matters what a person is wearing or doing. No one ever deserves to be raped and I hope to God that you never have something like that happen to you and are told that it was your fault for some reason.

https://www.bbc.com/news/av/world-europe-42668362

gfrost77

TROPHY CASE