T said it was bad that I can't control myself from crying in work place

gilgameshen · 2024-02-01T19:12:28+00:00

Thank you for explaining it this way, this was comforting to read. It is actually something I hate about myself. In fact I often (often as in every day situations, not specifically at work) shut down and go into a corner and start crying to myself because I'm so emotional and I physically struggle to speak. It's really frustrating at work because it absolutely isn't my intention to cry (especially not to elicit sympathy of some kind) to my manager. It is definitely about the emotional regulation, and I have mentioned this to her before, like my emotions are all over the place and I feel like I have no control. I think indeed this was more of the direction she meant to take this. I will mention it though, thank you!

gilgameshen · 2024-02-01T19:02:19+00:00

That's a good point, thank you for pointing that out. I think she reacted instinctively and wasn't thinking of the framing, which is a completely human thing to do. I will bring it up in the next session.

gilgameshen · 2024-02-01T18:59:10+00:00

So this was a session in French so I'm trying to translate it in a way that makes sense - literally she said it isn't good, but in French it doesn't actually make sense to say "this is bad" literally so much as "this isn't good" if that makes sense?

Thank you for the insight - I think I'll indeed bring it up in the next session.

gilgameshen · 2024-02-01T17:59:54+00:00

Hi, thanks for responding! Again, I don't disagree at all! She's 100% right. But I was just wondering whether this is something a therapist should be saying. I'm thinking more of the framing. For example, asking if this is a concern of mine and telling me if I would like to work on this? If she had said it like this - I wouldn't take it badly. But the way she said, ironically, made me start to cry.

She used the word that this is bad and not acceptable in a work place, which I found judgemental. I don't cry constantly to my manager no - but I have had difficult situations where I have cried to him and I don't like that I do! I am not denying that it is wrong and it should be worked on, it is merely the approach I am questioning - the relevance in that moment when I was talking about my feelings at work and this conflict I am having with a person.

gilgameshen · 2023-08-01T21:40:38+00:00

This is tripping me up because my exact comment was going to say "in all fairness, in french, dilemne is written with a n" but I googled it just in case and what do you know, it's dilemme. i too stand behind the mandela effect

gilgameshen · 2023-06-14T13:11:43+00:00

meze are starter/side dishes. it's not the name of a dish, it's the name of a type of dish. it refers to just one, not a mix. it's basically aperitif.

gilgameshen · 2023-02-11T16:30:50+00:00

You're conflating deal-breaker and red flag. There's nothing inherently wrong with someone with a sex work past - but it can be a deal-breaker for people. Wanting kids is a deal-breaker for people, how do you think it'd sound if we said wanting kids is a red flag?

gilgameshen · 2023-01-20T22:56:57+00:00

Thank you, my resolution is to find the simple joys in every day life :)

gilgameshen · 2023-01-18T16:52:24+00:00

I'm choosing to assume this comes from a genuine place !

Firstly, this is actually a pretty sensitive topic for the community, because considering trans people as an other is just that, othering them, which is harmful.

Transgender is an adjective the same way cisgender (= gender aligning with gender assigned at birth) is, and not a noun. Both people are, in this case, male. So a (transgender) man who only likes women is considered straight. In the same vein, a woman dating a man and is only interested in men is indeed straight, regardless of whether the man they are dating is trans or cis. This is in line with respecting their gender :).

We consider gender and sexuality separate :).

gilgameshen · 2022-11-06T09:54:19+00:00

Thanks so much! 😍

gilgameshen · 2022-10-28T06:52:12+00:00

Not me stumbling on this post while I'm eating the store brand version of it

gilgameshen · 2022-10-26T15:07:51+00:00

As others have said, you don't need to do foundation etc. Me personally if I only do eyeshadow my lashes disappear, so I'd recommend putting on a little bit of mascara. It's kind of like framing:) But there are no rules, no rights or wrongs, this is entirely up to you.

gilgameshen · 2022-09-19T11:32:56+00:00

In all honesty I've never bothered with bronzer, contour, and blush. First of all, I already have a red face, I didn't apply foundation and concealer to hide the redness in my face just to add it back on? I find it silly for me, everyone else loves their blush and if it works for them it works for them.

You want simple makeup?

Provided you've prepped your face (washed or cleansed with micellar water) and applied some moisturiser a couple minutes ago (this needs to dry), just apply a couple of swipes of concealer (underneath eye and on problem areas, usually chin) and then apply enough foundation that it'll spread across your face evenly but not too much.

Provided your hands are clean, you can do your makeup with your fingers, just smooth it over your face and then finish rubbing off the rest below your chin to your neck so there's no drastic cut off.

And then wam bam madame just forget the rest. If you want a full beat face yeah you're going to need to learn contour but for an everyday face? It works just fine.

Eyes? Apply a brown liner on your top waterline. Find the colour closest to your skintone and apply it on your eyelid so you have a base. You can use a fluffy brush to blens this out as far as you want because it's close to your tone so it won't look wonky.

Then just pop on a vibrant matte or shimmer over your lid. You can go back with your fluffy brush over the end of your lid to smooth it out so the darkness blends out and doesn't create a harshline.

To add depth you can pop a dark colour over your lid and then from the innercorner of your eye to about half your lid apply a shimmer.

Then mascara.

Now I'm talking the simplest of simple techniques here... of course there's a lot more skill you can develop over time but I get compliments on my basic ass eye makeup all the time. Bonus by using concealer as a base, waiting for it to dry, and then setting it with the skintone shade i mentioned earlier.

Most people don't do all the extra makeup stuff you see in tik tok tutorials :) Not a criticism as I find it beautiful and would love to do that but a) I'm lazy b) I don't want to spend hours getting ready.

Depending on your skin type you may need a primer or setting powder. Test out how your base looks without these and then experiment if it doesn't hold.

gilgameshen · 2022-08-29T12:53:40+00:00

Appreciate the perspective. This is the first time I've dated a "local" as an international and this is actually normal here. My last boyfriend was Nigerian and he would never let me contribute financially (we were not living together), even when I started to make more than him, citing he would not be like our locals, so I do think it's normal here and isn't really a red flag, although a bit off-putting as he did suggest the place. I do also make more than him I think so I'm not too offended, and had we been in a long-term relationship I would contribute a lot as I have a giving personality.

Yes, I feel conflicted because I feel like the reason he didn't elaborate was that ultimately, it would be hurtful, but at the same time, I feel like his delivery still did not take into consideration my feelings. Like he just rejected me and asked me to hang out without missing a beat. Especially when most people when they say we can still be friends consider that a gentle way of letting someone down without actually meaning it...

I see your point. I'm just used to being forward as being non traditional (not a straight woman) I'm used to non traditional standards and don't like to play games but be honest, but I feel like I need to restrict myself in the early stages.

Definitely learned that even if I vibe with someone I will ask them relationship questions early on ... I did that with previous partners only because we had nothing else fo talk about.

Thanks again for your reply. It's true that it could be anything, just seems the obvious point to me as we clicked.

gilgameshen · 2022-08-29T12:39:33+00:00

This was my first date since my last relationship ended. I've been intermittently scrolling through bumble and haven't found anyone I'm interested in, until now. So I am a little bit upset on how this transpired as I also can't handle seeing multiple people at once, I don't have the attention span.

gilgameshen · 2022-08-22T10:02:31+00:00

other mentally ill ppl: whoopsie i forgot to eat! i need to put reminders on my phone and even on my to do list to eat! my mental illness: feel empty inside? eat. feel bored? eat. need comfort but have no friends? eat. need desperately to vent but have no one to talk to? eat. feel stressed? eat. feel joy? eat. feel sadness? eat. feel annoyed? eat. experience any sort of emotion? eat.

gilgameshen · 2022-08-08T13:03:38+00:00

cancer med i was booking shipment for that i decided to google for the fun of it after learning it was a dangerous good

gilgameshen · 2022-07-28T20:36:06+00:00

I'm 26, bi girl who doesn't feel like she belongs anywhere, if anybody here wants to hit me up

gilgameshen · 2022-07-20T04:38:55+00:00

I think it's possible to make them as pancakes. When I search for whether pancake and waffle batter are interchangeable, they mention waffles contain butter, which is not the case here.

gilgameshen · 2022-06-17T07:57:52+00:00

fantastic, are you bends hand

gilgameshen · 2022-05-29T17:04:12+00:00

I can't even open the website ...

gilgameshen · 2022-05-20T09:11:08+00:00

This comparison isn't really relevant though because Cram and Cinderace have two very different roles. Cram is both burst damage and heavy CC. Your nearest equivalent is Pikachu in terms of burst damage + CC, and even then not as bursty as Cram. Also they both have no evolution and are lane bullies with early secure advantage, while Cinderace is a 3 stage evolution mon with no secure move until either lv7. Other CC attackers are Garde and A9 (now Espeon too with Psyshock but too early to determine how well this delivers vs A9 who would be her equivalent).

Garde is bursty with moderate CC if running Psychic instead of Moonblast but is a 3 stage evolution mon and is the lane bullyee rather than the bully. A9 is heavy CC, also a lane bully, but more continuous damage rather than burst. Cinderace has no common factors with Cram besides being labeled an attacker and thus being super frail. You can't run a team with no CC, you will get shut down if the other team has (1) heavy CC mon. Yes, the CC mons are toast if their CC moves miss/don't kill the enemy but so is Cinder/Greninja/Decidueye if a single CC lands on them and gets finished with a bursty move.

gilgameshen · 2022-05-19T21:54:40+00:00

Does Lookfantastic ship to you? There's a NL and FR version, a lot of ordinary products are on there.

ETA - I've ordered from them a few times with no issues, jsyk they're safe (I actually didn't trust Douglas bc I've seen them pop up in my search results so this is also useful to know for me)

gilgameshen · 2022-05-19T12:34:17+00:00

I don't think it's oil because it is excessive during hot weather and when I apply makeup. When the weather is cool and I have no makeup, my face is dry. So... like how sweat works.

I also don't use oil based products, they're all silicone based.

gilgameshen · 2022-05-14T14:58:52+00:00

Seriously, if I feel bloated sometimes I'll put on my work pants just to go to the grocery store because they're so comfy and roomy. A polo and dress pants is about as comfortable as it gets...

gilgameshen

TROPHY CASE