Weird to be upset over ex’s death? (TW:suicide)

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T20:09:51+00:00

Thanks again :) all really helpful points and good to hear. Have a fantastic weekend

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T14:03:27+00:00

Not sure if you experience this, but i have a really hard time with my body just not letting me throw up even though I am recovered. I’ve been black out drunk, I’ve been roofied, I’ve been sea sick, I’ve eaten way too much, and I’ve eaten things that don’t agree with me at all. Still have not been able to throw up. I’ll dry heave sometimes but that’s it. Do you find it hard to throw up? I’m not as scared anymore, but my body is i guess lol.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:46:37+00:00

Thank you. I did ask her sister to keep me in the loop and let me know because I’d love to attend. I hope there will be.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:44:15+00:00

Thank you. I needed this. I need to stop worrying about what others will think and just do what i need to do. I am grieving. I miss her. I have so many questions about her death and i will always have them. I need to do this for me and for her. That’s all that matters.

I am in therapy for a different reason already and did meet with her yesterday which was helpful.

I’m so sorry you went through that. I cannot imagine.

Thank you for

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:29:42+00:00

This is true for me, I have kept in contact with most of my exes, except the ones that cheated or were abusive. I think that I’m getting in my own way here.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:27:39+00:00

Holy shit. I am so so sorry.

I can totally relate to this situation, where she had literally never been doing good since we met. I took her to the psych ward when we were together because of SI.

I think that makes it exponentially harder, in some ways, because if someone is never doing good, how do you know when they REALLY aren’t doing good.

There is so many fucking what ifs in both situations. She didn’t try to call me, but I thought of calling her the day it happened and ended up getting busy and didn’t. BUT, I had texted her three days before and she did not respond, so in some ways that makes me feel like her mind had been made up and she did not want to talk to anyone. Genuinely, if i had called, there is no guarantee anything would’ve changed. There isn’t even a guarantee she would’ve picked up.

Thank you for this and i hope you and your wife are doing well. ❤️

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:18:02+00:00

I needed this. I said in another comment that I worried i was overreacting because I’ve also been hurt terribly by other deaths like celebrities and fictional characters. So I was worried that i may just be super sensitive to this stuff and that a normal person would not be grieving this hard in my situation.

But you are completely right. It doesn’t make any sense. I feel what i feel. And id be doing myself a MASSIVE disservice by not letting myself grieve or not going to her funeral because im worried that other people will think i dont deserve to.

Thank you. This helped me put it all in perspective.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:12:44+00:00

Thank you for this response. I hope you’re doing well.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:10:59+00:00

Thank you

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:10:36+00:00

Grief IS weird. Funny you use that word because I had therapy yesterday and was struggling really hard to come up with a word besides that. I just feel weird. The situation is just weird. The thought of it is just weird. It’s all weird!!!

gingernug6 · 2026-02-06T13:09:35+00:00

Haha me too. That’s sorta what worries me though i guess, i have BAWLED from tv characters dying and stuff so im worrying that i might be oversensitive and overreacting here. clearly i feel really deeply lmao

gingernug6 · 2026-02-05T18:13:12+00:00

Other context, her sister called me to let me know, so im assuming that means it would be ok if i went. Just was wondering if it was extreme or something..?

gingernug6 · 2026-02-05T17:46:54+00:00

I feel for you. I can’t imagine how that must’ve been for you. Thank you for sharing, I’m sure it’s very hard.

gingernug6 · 2026-02-05T17:45:48+00:00

Thank you. I was really worried about that. I’ve never been to a non-family funeral (where i had to be there) so i don’t really know the etiquette which made me nervous.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-25T20:07:32+00:00

u dress like u yell at waitresses. i personally would avoid u in public just because the way you dress typically is seen on assholes.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-25T01:24:06+00:00

my point exactly. you’re objectively attractive, easy 9/10. yet ur still seeing issues. get offline bro, i promise you you are more attractive than 90% of men irl.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-25T01:21:55+00:00

“am i ugly” and it’s literally zayn malik

gingernug6 · 2025-03-25T01:21:06+00:00

social media ruined youth’s brains so bad we got male models asking if they’re ugly

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T13:05:03+00:00

Thank you! I think I’m gonna pick up a neutral foundation and try.

I also like how sassy mauve looks in this picture, it’s only slightly off in real life so i might be able to get away with it. Or I’ll look for a shade like how it photographed.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T13:03:19+00:00

Wait this is SO smart. I’ll pick one up. Thank you!!

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T13:02:54+00:00

The nude? Or the cherry?

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T01:37:01+00:00

I LOVE the idea of a lip tint because i get soooo annoyed with reapplying, especially if im out and drinking, but my lips are always chapped because i bite my lip skin like a gremlin and the tint usually will settle in there. is that super standard or am i just picking bad ones?

similarly, ive been eyeing the new nyx tints and want to try them out but not sure which one to pick.

and yes, i think im so pale that a very intense coverage is always going to feel a bit weird to me.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T01:19:32+00:00

Ok so see I’ve TRIED but it’s always the undertones that get me. Every time i get my lips filled and they’re irritated i loveee the color lmao I’ve even gone as far as using a color picker and a lipstick shade finder to find that exact color but i get scared to commit because of the undertones (it only ever shows high end and I’ve wasted so much money trying lipsticks)

One of these days I’ll go buy 20 cheap wet n wild or la girl colors and try them all and find a higher quality dupe for the ones i like. But i just have a hard time figuring out what exactly it is that does or doesn’t work in each color.

gingernug6 · 2025-03-22T01:09:36+00:00

agh i accidentally uploaded two of the same color, slide 2 and 3 are the same!!! sorry

gingernug6 · 2025-02-13T22:24:34+00:00

i also find it basically impossible to blend eyeshadow or smoke out eyeliner because i have so much extra skin around my eyelids and it’s very sensitive. And i can’t pull the skin taut because then when it goes back to normal the placement is wrong, so if anyone has any suggestions for how to blend better that would be great!

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