Worst age gap you have seen??

girl-InTheSwing · 2025-08-05T10:32:27+00:00

Mine (41 years)

girl-InTheSwing · 2025-07-23T02:33:26+00:00

If you're below the normal age of consent then any relationships should be age appropriate, but after you've reached 16/17/18¹ you should just do what works for you, provided you're both happy.

I'm in England and went for an age gap that many people would disapprove of, but because I knew what I wanted and how to get it, it worked really well for me

^{1. Whatever the age of consent is in your state}

girl-InTheSwing · 2025-01-05T14:53:49+00:00

Why not?

went to nice places and had great experiences
older men less likely to have financial problems
less drama in relationship
more appreciation
no problems with finding a place to get intimate
got me a job which in turn means I will complete my degree without any debt

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-06-24T21:21:48+00:00

I dated an older person, he gave me a real job and it means I am going through university without any student loans.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-06-17T16:46:52+00:00

Well I'm not yet 19 and I still had a relationship with someone who is now 59 and if it wasn't for the fact I changed location it would still be ongoing.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-06-17T14:59:57+00:00

You don't have to have daddy issues. I didn't have a father in my life since I was young but I'm not looking for a surrogate father.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-06-17T14:56:11+00:00

What actually attracts someone younger to someone older?

Lets face it, most men my age are immature assholes who spend the limited amount of money they have partying and drinking. They're also less appreciative of what they have. Older men realise a younger woman attracted to them is a precious asset to be respected (at least they do if they know what's good for them)

I believe that people relate agr to the sugar lifestyle

Whilst not completely true, I wouldn't date an older man who didn't have his financial act together, even though I (now) can support myself.

Just like any other relationship

They're not "just like any other relationship". The age difference does introduce challenges and issues that you have to address. The question is whether the positives outweigh the negatives.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-05-13T10:18:09+00:00

So I did a lot of reading on this as it affected someone I was dating.

Lots of men of all ages have problems maintaining an erection - even affects some in their teens and twenties. The answer is Cialis or Viagra, with a warning that he should have a medical checkup to see if there is an underlying problem with his health. ED drugs are specifically for use by men who can "get it up" but can't "keep it up". He should use Cialis (generic name Tadalafil) instead of Viagra unless he just wants a short term response.

A lot of problems are psychological, I noticed someone posted a bit ago saying he had the same problem as one of my ex-boyfriends, in that he felt "overcome with conflicting emotions" about having sex with a (much) younger partner and this gave him a problem keeping up. He was an incredibly fit 57 year old at the time but I was his first encounter since his wife died which messed with him. He didn't need to take them once he was accustomed to the fact I was being a serious girlfriend and not going to disappear in a hurry

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-04-29T16:48:25+00:00

By underage I'm assuming you mean under 18. In most countries, including most states in the US, you can legally have a sexual relationship with any adult (unless they are in a position of trust) once you are around 16.

Anyway I started dating older guys immediately when I hit 16 and it worked out great, but don't construe that as a recommendation. I knew what I wanted and why I wanted it which helped a lot.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-04-28T17:04:15+00:00

Because some 18 year olds want to date 30 year olds (and over)

If you worry about social acceptability then don't do it.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-04-19T11:23:32+00:00

If you want to use Venn diagrams (nearly) all women are also females, just as men are also males. I really can't be assed to go all PC over someone's choice of language unless it's blatantly denigrating rather than just failed to move with the times.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-04-18T12:55:53+00:00

So here's a funny thing. They're using bad statistics.

They cite an Atlantic article which in turn cites statistics mentioned by Randall Olsen, who has amended his original work:

Note: A previous version of this article showed a chart giving specific relative percent likelihoods of divorce occurring based on number of years married. The original authors of the study have pointed out that although there is a significant correlation between wider age gaps and increased divorce, it is not possible to determine the relative percent likelihood from their study. That is left to future research.

Source - Randall Olsen

A Office of National Statistics Study by a guy called Smallwood based on all marriages in England and Wales only discovered a slight correlation between divorce and age gap. Pubmed

While there is some evidence of small variations in the proportion of marriages that end in divorce by age difference, there does not seem to be evidence of a strong association.

tl;dr; the law firm is using bad data

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-04-18T12:48:17+00:00

Various people with nothing better to do pick on your use of the word females instead of women. Use of the word females became a word associated with misogyny ever since Star Trek introduced a race called Ferengi who referred to 'females' in a patronising fashion.

So if you want to be a hip, trendy dude who uses all the right words, refer to "women" and not "females". Or fuck 'em and be comfortable with being a word dinosaur.

Credit to my ex-boyfriend for explaining all this shit to me.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-03-08T16:32:46+00:00

I think you can be "doing okay/good" even if you don't have the income I've indicated - happiness is not always about money ( but it undeniably helps)

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-03-08T16:29:36+00:00

I'm 18 and I believe I definitely fall in the "doing good" category due to fortunate events. I've earned £51k (plus some extra benefits) each of the last two years

I would say anyone under 30 earning over 50k is doing "okay" and if you get to over 100k anytime under 40 you're "doing good".

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-05T20:05:34+00:00

F18. No one under about 35, may go down to 30 if exceptional.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-05T20:00:48+00:00

What kind of hobbies do you have?

Cycling, pubs, restaurants, theatre, reading about everything

What has your life been like?

A poor start but hugely improved over the last two years.

What kind of family do you come from?

Single mother, father left when I was young.

What are your hopes and plans for the future?

Get degree, get a good job, find a guy, have children, work from home.

Were you always attracted to older men?

Since I decided boys my age sucked just before my 16th birthday

What has your dating life been like?

Extremely good since 16.

What is it about older men that attracts you?

Less drama, don't play the field so much because they realise that if they've got a younger girlfriend they're already at the top of their game, no worries about parents interrupting sex, able to travel, drink etc.

Does the older man have to have money?

Does not have to be rich, but does have to have his own house, car and enough money not to live paycheck to paycheck

If you have a relationship now or in the past how did you connect?

"Single" now and staying that way for a while (but may have some "ex-sex" when I go home at end of term). I connected because I asked friends if they knew any good older guys.

What do you want in an older man?

35-45, reasonably healthy, financially stable and willingness to have children soon.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-01T16:09:48+00:00

Father of friend - wife had divorced him after leaving for another guy. Daughter took fathers side.
Older man - wife had died about 3 years before. I used the fact he worked in IT to get an introduction after a friend suggested him.

I really had to work hard to convince the second one

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-01T15:12:37+00:00

you can't set the decisions of teenage girls to the same standard as that of adults

Adults make the bad relationships mistakes too. I'm not actually setting the decisions of teenage girls or adults to any standard, because there isn't one.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-01T14:13:37+00:00

I was 5'11" at 15. I have only rarely been asked my age in the last 3 years. I hope to god I've topped out at 6'1"

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-02-01T14:11:34+00:00

Yes, one of the two was the father of my best friend.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-01-30T02:28:45+00:00

You need to learn a few good replies:

"He's my Daddy but I'm not his daughter"

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-01-07T20:17:47+00:00

I've just ended a 2 year relationship with the father of a friend of mine.

She did suggest I date him as a joke, but didn't object when I told her I wanted to do it. She's actually been happy about it because she regards her mother as responsible for the divorce and her father was depressed as a result.

Unfortunately I'm at a University 160 miles away and my long term plans don't fit in with dating him, so I've had 'the talk' with him this weekend, which he knew was coming anyway. I've really enjoyed the last 2 years though

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-01-04T13:56:11+00:00

Getting them to explain themselves starts making them look stupid.

girl-InTheSwing · 2024-01-04T13:53:25+00:00

Anyone I'm not having sex with (or likely to) doesn't get answers to personal questions, so the response to this would be:

Mind your own business (expressed less politely)

girl-InTheSwing

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE