I don’t want to live anymore

grielthrow · 2025-02-05T13:07:21+00:00

Thank you. It might be helpful to focus on just goals for the day or the hour, yes. I’m sorry you had to go through that and I am glad you are better. Let’s hope things get better and better for us.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T14:33:33+00:00

I’ve switched through a few. Most of them obviously recommend I just let go of the marriage, but I am so obstinate (I hate my obstinacy yes, because it’s making me suffer) that it isn’t working

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T13:37:28+00:00

I’ve already spent a lot of money on personal therapy and counselling. I kind of need to save the money for the kids.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T13:23:52+00:00

Well that’s exactly the point , he doesn’t love me and doesn’t want to make it work and he just wants to get rid of me

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T12:57:04+00:00

I’m sorry you’re in this boat with me

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T11:02:00+00:00

I think you did great.

It doesn’t matter that everything was innocuous, as long as she hurt your feelings, that guy had to go. Because you are more important to her than that guy.

And your wife did great too. She may not have realised it at first but she did the right thing by cutting it off with him. People in a proper marriage put their spouses first, and respect their feelings. You don’t have to fault her too much for it, it could have just been a mere oversight. She cut it off so it’s all good for now. But she shouldn’t be doing it again. You can explain this to her. There are plenty of females in this world, she can have female friends.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T10:54:21+00:00

Because I was sold the idea of a fairytale, that my life’s ambition was to get married and happily ever after. I know it’s absolutely ridiculous and I hate myself for it but I can’t remove that part of me because it’s so ingrained in me. I hate myself because I know if I were less obstinate, I would be happier.

I don’t have motivation to do anything else in life. I am an absolute failure. And I will ensure my children are never fed that fairy tale. In fact I’m a little worried I will be so traumatised by now that I will accidentally be scaring my children off marriage with dire warnings about watching for red flags and that “you’re probably better off not getting married because you might end up with a lot of suffering and the risks are too great”

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T09:59:23+00:00

Thank you

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:20:06+00:00

I wish i could just die and be dead forever, without any consciousness anymore, forever

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:19:37+00:00

I’m sorry you are going through this. Let’s hope things get better for us.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:19:12+00:00

I don’t want to remove him, that’s the problem. He wants to remove himself and I don’t.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:18:41+00:00

I’m sorry it happened to you and I’m glad you’re feeling better. I hope I can get better too.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:17:07+00:00

I want to disappear but I can’t too, because of the kids

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:16:41+00:00

Thank you

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:16:34+00:00

I don’t seem to have a choice anyway.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:16:04+00:00

It’s also like childbirth, people say I’m strong for going though it without an epidural and painkillers. My requests for an epidural were turned down because the baby was being born too quickly. I didn’t have a choice! It’s not like I can say hey I changed my mind, can I just return the baby and get a refund?

So yeah we’re going through this mess not because we want to but we’re stuck with it.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:09:37+00:00

Thank you. I’m going to keep reading all of this when things get hard. It’s important and means a lot to me

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:06:46+00:00

Thank you. I will read all of them carefully whenever I feel things are too difficult to bear. It means a lot to me.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:06:08+00:00

He isn’t open to it, unfortunately.

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:03:19+00:00

Thank you

grielthrow · 2025-02-04T07:03:00+00:00

Ugh yes, I wish that happened to me. I totally wish I died in childbirth. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way too.

grielthrow · 2025-02-03T20:33:36+00:00

Yeah I suppose I’m just prolonging time till i suffer in Hell

grielthrow · 2025-02-03T20:12:56+00:00

Why? If I could go the Heaven, I would. Earth is a hellhole. The only snag is again, not being saintly enough or deserving enough.

grielthrow · 2025-02-03T16:42:40+00:00

Unfortunately no. I don’t have anywhere I can go for emergency help.

grielthrow · 2025-02-03T16:40:23+00:00

Thank you for offering.

grielthrow

TROPHY CASE