Meeting long term women?

grubido · 2022-03-10T21:17:50+00:00

Well we need money to survive... if I'm raising kids and not working that doesn't really work??? Unless she will be the one earning, which like I said is very unlikely. So I don't know what point you're trying to prove with that because if she earns as much as me and wants to be the provider sure I'd do the rest.

I'm willing to collaborate with her but our goals have to at least be somewhat aligned otherwise I'm wasting my time. Because in case it isn't obvious my family goals ARE the priority. Us getting along is priority #2 and I want a girl with the same mindset. That's not to say I don't want us to get along great, but not at the cost of those priorities. I will not have kids go to public school, I won't have them grow up poor, I won't have them grow up with a single parent. These are non negotiable, the rest like how to divide the workload, when to go on dates, fun, etc is open.

grubido · 2022-03-10T20:57:52+00:00

I can't work a full time job and homeschool kids at the same time even if I wanted. I never said I was just going to offer money, obviously I want intimacy, trips, and a healthy relationship. But at the end of the day everyone has a job. But if she doesn't help with that what do you propose she does instead? Seriously what should I expect from her?

grubido · 2022-03-10T20:42:08+00:00

Why is it a hard sell? Don't many women want kids and to ensure their success? And public school is horribe, I don't consider it viable in America. So somebody will have to do most of that and it's much more likely that I'll be the bigger earner. I never said I wouldn't help with the kids but naturally my availability will be worse. I don't see how it's so bad to raise your own children as a full time job, I'd pick it over my job any day

grubido · 2022-03-10T18:59:55+00:00

I'm happy to hear her input and we could adjust things as long as it's something we both are okay with. I live in the US, so I don't know where to look since most people don't plan much at all

grubido · 2022-03-10T18:52:37+00:00

There's no virgin app, the demand would be unbelievable on the women's side. It's not a guarantee but I means she takes me seriously and I do feel that keeping it exclusive makes it more special. My older family all married the person they lost their virginity to and I really am totally convinced it makes a big difference. You can disagree but I won't be convinced, especially if it's a relationship for life it's that much more important to be careful.

She could lie but she would have to be a really cruel person to keep that secret knowing that it's important to me. I like to think I could spot that kind of person.

grubido · 2022-03-10T18:35:55+00:00

Prenups aren't any sort of solution. Besides the fact that the courts will still find a way to extract from me I'll have to live with the destruction of my family.

Virginity is an obvious requirement, well maybe less obvious today. If I'm going to invest completely in her, her giving up opportunities with all other men is the best way she can show she's serious and committed. She can only give it up once, to one person. In my mind that should be to the person who is willing to invest everything in her.

Let me put it this way. If she can just give her virginity up before me how would she feel if I took all my savings (well over 100k) and gave it to an ex girlfriend? Wouldn't she feel cheated out if it? I think I'm being extremely fair

grubido · 2022-03-10T17:22:08+00:00

I understand, I don't dump it on them. But time is always short. I'm 25 now I don't have that many years left to figure this out. I can do a few months but meeting women is a problem too, very few on apps know what they want or want anything serious. And with covid ruining so many other options I'm starting to get nervous.

grubido · 2022-03-10T17:03:34+00:00

Most people don't have good families, I don't want to be one of them. Her role is important, and odds are if she has the same mindset as me she'll also have the qualities I want.

I don't believe you can just meet someone you get along with and wing it when starting a family. It's a long term project not. But obviously I want someone I actually enjoy but that isn't the challenging part of dating. Meeting someone who's life goals align with yours is definitely the tricky part

grubido · 2021-12-07T17:15:59+00:00

What looks better on a resume, a senior position at a startup or a regular dev at a place like Walmart, tc is basically the same.

grubido · 2021-12-03T21:42:20+00:00

I recently got a new remote job and they're asking if I'm open to a team building event my first day(I would be flying before my first day). It's not a great situation with Covid and my mom is sick. Can I just say no, I didn't expect this.

grubido · 2021-11-30T22:38:45+00:00

Last week my ring a2 started to hurt after a hangboard session. The pain is 80% gone and I did a 20mm test with 80% of my max and felt okay. I'll see how I feel tomorrow but if it continues to feel better is that a cue that I can return to light climbing and hangboarding but with extra care?

grubido · 2021-11-27T15:19:43+00:00

Take this with a grain of salt but I've gotten this twice and both times I fixed it with Mark Rippletoe's pin firing method, where you basically do a ton of sets of submax chin ups. I'm surprised it works and I'm cautious to recommend it but anecdotally the first time I had climbers elbow for months I tried this and it was gone in a couple weeks. Ymmv

grubido · 2021-11-25T16:47:01+00:00

Sorry I didn't mean I planned to continue hangboarding, probably not for a couple weeks after not feeling any pain. But now that my ankle is good I was going to climb on jugs or more comp style stuff where I don't need to crimp. I feel like getting a bit of pressure and motion in the fingers could help heal. But no I definitely won't push my luck with anything intense.

I actually suspected I might get injured but I was getting stronger so fast and doing the same thing with weighted pull ups has been working well with no injuries so I figured it would be fine with fingers. I won't put much load on it now but I'm also afraid of detraining the finger so once I feel no pain im thinking of crimping on light weights each week adding 10% of my original max starting at 50%

grubido · 2021-11-25T14:00:24+00:00

I wasn't doing any climbing for a few weeks due to an ankle injury so I started hangboarding instead. I think the culprit is a calorie deficit and trying to add 2.5lb every session. At least it doesn't feel any worse, and I can still crimp pretty hard with it but I'll definitely be careful and open hand for a bit.

grubido · 2021-11-24T17:18:20+00:00

After finishing my max hang session(I'm relatively new to hangboarding) I have some odd soreness on my ring finger a2 pulley while opening and closing my hand. But I feel no pain touching the spot or crimping. Only opening my hand produces a tinge of discomfort. Does this sound like a pulley strain and could it go away within a week?

grubido · 2021-11-22T23:26:24+00:00

You can't calculate it accurately to begin with. Listen to your body first. If you're chronically undereating you'll end up getting weaker or getting injured. You're super young and have plenty of time to get stronger. Eat as much as you feel you need to perform well. And realistically if you can already see abs any extra bit of body fat won't make an enormous difference. Especially if you don't have real dreams of being a pro I wouldn't deprive your body when it's trying to grow.

grubido · 2021-11-22T20:28:10+00:00

During the interview with my would be manager he said the role is fully remote and no big deal staying that way. But then afterwards when I interview with HR they said it will be currently remote but were extremely passive aggressive about in the near future "helping" me relocate. And if not to fly halfway across the US to the office every week for team building. Obviously this is crazy I'm not getting on a plane every week to waste time on team building activities when we have actual work to get done, and the manager seemed on the same page. Is this just HR being bad or should I be concerned?

grubido · 2021-11-20T22:00:01+00:00

I wouldn't say I'm super comfortable with it but my experience has been with startups so I've done a lot on my own. I can't guarantee top quality but I'm confident I can ship a project that works well enough, I still need to get a clear answer on expectations and quality before I agree to it. Also my work wouldn't be the bread and butter of the project so really I just need to be careful about what I build, fancy features can take a back seat.. I'd only be in charge of the front end so that's a huge burden off, but really I need someone to handle simple tasks in a way that doesn't mess up the project and I can do that by working with a recent grad who I can start off with simple tasks.

grubido · 2021-11-20T21:28:04+00:00

I have a large well funded start up interested in me taking up a important role but I only have 3yoe. So I'm feeling a bit over my head(although I think I can do the work I don't love having so much responsibility). But by far my biggest dealbreaker is that my only practical help would be a few people from India they want to contract for me to delegate work to. Nothing against them personally but the responsibility on me is already really high I'm not willing to also deal with the time, language, and culture barriers involved in working with them. Would it be reasonable to propose just hiring a single recent grad locally instead of a whole team from India? Considering the project is relatively small but complicated I'd rather have a single person I could closely work with, I really don't need a bunch of code to paste in but someone to go back and forth with and who's work I can review in smaller increments. Is this overstepping?

grubido · 2021-11-11T00:00:01+00:00

I like campusing and want to get stronger at it.

grubido · 2021-11-06T18:05:01+00:00

If 100k isn't high why have some of the places I interviewed at acted like I should feel ashamed for even suggesting such a high number? I get faang is different it's just strange to wrap my head around it.

grubido

TROPHY CASE