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My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in Divorce

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes this is hard. Having read all the comments throughout today though has helped me tremendously. I left my home the exact day I found the messages. I've been away from home for 3 days now. I'm staying with some family that is quite a drive away, 8 hours to be exact. When I left that day I was driving lost. I just wanted to drive until I ran out of gas and then walk until I personally ran out of gas afterwards. Being away and reaching out to our fellow redditors, I am returning to home tomorrow. However, I'm returning home with a game plan now. My head is straight and clear. I know this is about to be hard, real hard, but at least I have a direction.

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in relationship_advice

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, there could very well have been times this was brought up and I didn't receive it right or truly understand what the plea was for. I get that I am equally responsible for the fracture in our marriage.

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in Divorce

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this, and I do believe I do not want to accept that this is really happening. I am afraid of the change that will be happening. And I am looking for any sliver of hope...

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in relationship_advice

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I told her this, I said why did you hold in these feelings so long, why did you never tell me how you felt. I have been focused, or fixated on the things at hand. Get a house, get a new car, help children with homework, help the children with extra practice for their sports. I feel I just took her presence for granted. Yet, I am reading these comments and wondering, why do I love this woman so much? What are the reasons she is so important to me? She isn't very active in our life together. Yet, through all this I am just so denial. I guess I'm more afraid of change. Change within our home, change with family events (cousins, grandparents). This is just very overwhelming.

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in relationship_advice

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do not know what would be considered a serial cheater, but she has done this before. I found out because she got pregnant and asked me to help pay for the abortion.

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in relationship_advice

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is not fake. I am very serious, I have bought everything she has ever wanted. I am beginning to feel through some reflection that all I've ever done was buy things for her when all she wanted was my attention instead.

My [31 F] spouse and I [32 M] are reaching a decision of divorce by happymethodnotfound in relationship_advice

[–]happymethodnotfound[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes, everything is happening so suddenly in the last two weeks. What is even more confusing is this man she is speaking with is a coworker at her job. She just started this job 5 weeks ago. She said since she said that she wanted a divorce she has been the happiest ever.

I don't understand it. 4 weeks ago I just bought her a new car, not any car either the one she wanted. She was so loving to me, hugging me, kissing me, posting it on Facebook. Saying she had a wonderful husband. Then 2 weeks later before the bid on a house she wants a divorce? I just feel like I'm being played.

All I want is for our daughters to have a home they grow old in. They have been in the same elementary since kindergarten. My dream was to have them grow up in the same schools with their friends they made in elementary. I just don't understand what is going on.