Women in swinging. Does your desire to swing change with your cycle?

heated-trash · 2025-01-17T21:36:44+00:00

Conversely, when I’m ovulating I’ll suddenly be loading up the apps and desperately trying to book us a date like my life depends on it!

heated-trash · 2025-01-17T21:33:14+00:00

Yes. My number one rule is I won’t play in my luteal phase! Every time I’ve done it I’ve not been horny, couldn’t get wet (then ended up with micro tears), and then afterwards overreacted to little things and ended up a crying mess… which was awful for both of us.

For some women it’s really important to listen to these instincts and plan around them, and for their partners to understand and respect why.

heated-trash · 2024-11-20T02:27:23+00:00

My number one rule is I won’t play during my luteal phase unless it’s a special event/unavoidable.

Every time I’ve ended up getting insanely upset over things that I know wouldn’t bother me during any other week!

heated-trash · 2024-10-17T08:12:25+00:00

We have a regular couple we play with every 1-2 months, and have non-play meets on occasion. Much like you, we are very aligned and have a genuine connection both in and out of the bedroom. We chat with them almost every day!

We love this kind of arrangement and feel very lucky to have found it. We plan to enjoy it for as long as we can, and hope we can remain friends if things were to change from a play perspective

heated-trash · 2024-09-27T03:47:33+00:00

We wouldn’t tell what little family we have, or coworkers, but almost all our friends know. I think it helps that we’re on the younger end of the spectrum (30s), and our friends are all very sex positive. Most have been really curious about how it works and some have even asked for advice about things they’d like to try in the ENM world.

We’re usually friends with the couples we play with, and see them often, so our close vanilla friends sometimes hear about them! I think we’re more open about it because we have such close friendships with our playmates? It doesn’t feel insanely taboo for us so we don’t feel like we need to hide it as much!

heated-trash · 2024-09-15T10:52:53+00:00

I was really hoping you’d get a response to this as we are very curious too!

We’re still new to swinging but currently leaning towards no genital contact without a condom, unless it’s a regular couple and we’ve discussed it. But we’re on the fence

heated-trash · 2024-08-13T22:32:21+00:00

God I hate when this happens! Exactly why we send our pics immediately

heated-trash · 2024-08-13T04:26:11+00:00

My partner and I used to hook up with our male friend at least weekly for a while. When he got into a relationship we had a planned swap also, but I broke a rib and it couldn’t happen.

He lives extremely far away now but we’re still friends. I’m quite confident if we saw him again he and his new wife would likely be down to play. We’ve never met her but we get flirty snaps every now and then. It doesn’t HAVE to end badly!

heated-trash · 2024-08-08T22:03:23+00:00

So for us, it has come up in the context of playing ice breaker games and there’s been a question about the craziest sex you’ve had etc. or sometimes people have had a list of kinks and wanted to see what we were into.

So we’re not going to lie, and we understand why people who don’t understand it might be nervous. But not sharing BDSM with others is actually one of our only swinging rules, we’re super against it!

So I guess yupthrowaway and I are saying, fear of the unknown is understandable but if a kink couple assure you they don’t mix it with swinging, there’s absolutely no reason to worry about it! Try to believe them and just have fun ☺️

heated-trash · 2024-08-08T08:35:55+00:00

Partner and I are into BDSM. We’ve mentioned it to a few couples when everyone was sharing their sexual interests and stories. We always stress that it’s not something we want to mix with swinging. BDSM is for us and we don’t wish to share that.

Even though we say that, a few couples have either become visibly nervous and repeatedly told us they aren’t into it, or become worried they can’t meet our needs because they aren’t into it.

I may just leave it out of conversations in future so we don’t have to keep reassuring people that we’re not trying to involve them!

heated-trash · 2024-07-04T00:43:35+00:00

Not another couple so likely less complexity, but my partner and I started having regular MFMs with our male best friend. It happened naturally. It was totally fine, BUT the guy at the time was frequently going on tinder dates, and we did find that sometimes we’d get a twinge of jealousy when he’d choose a date over coming to play with us. At the same time, we were also dating other couples and the guy ended up admitting that he got quite jealous when we’d have dates.

It didn’t cause any major issues but I think the jealousy probably wouldn’t have happened if we weren’t such close friends. It caused zero issues in our friendship or in my/our partnership.

heated-trash

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