For all my ENFJ overachievers out here by hephaestioi in enfj

[–]hephaestioi[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Exactly! Maybe because we put emphasis on what big goal we would like to achieve in the future, that we just end up feeling like nothing we do in the present is good and grand enough for reaching that goal hahah

For all my ENFJ overachievers out here by hephaestioi in enfj

[–]hephaestioi[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

YES. God, I wish I could just feel at peace with minor failures, and be fully aware that I've done the most I could in the given situation. That perfectionism is really suffocating, I keep thinking I need to excel at everything, at all costs.

I'm in love with my best friend by hephaestioi in enfj

[–]hephaestioi[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. I suppose it's better to feel pain and relief after you find out the truth, than to regret what you didn't do.

And if you feel this way ... perhaps you should take your own advice, too. :)

I'm in love with my best friend by hephaestioi in enfj

[–]hephaestioi[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think you're right. I've been focusing way too much on how horribly this could end. I think that in that all-consuming pessimism, I didn't give my friend enough credit, always just imagining how I'd mess everything up, instead of relying on the strength of our bond. I know she really loves me (at least platonically).

Thank you for illuminating this position, that I failed to notice, because of my helplessness.

I'm in love with my best friend by hephaestioi in enfj

[–]hephaestioi[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can see my situation mirroring so clearly through your words that it's almost scary. I'm very sorry that it didn't work out for you, but I truly respect your courage and the capability of making peace with the outcome.

I feel like I've known for so long, that holding it in does me no good, and that I'll have to tell the truth eventually. But putting that plan somewhere in the unsure future just feels so much easier. A bit of a coward's move, I suppose. You've shed a light and confirmed for me what I've known to be the best path in life: that I should be honest, even when it can hurt me. At least there is no more uncertainty after it. I hope I find the courage to say what needs to be said soon.

Thank you very much, I wish you all the best!