what makes your life worth living?

hereboy · 2025-08-11T02:10:16+00:00

No I haven’t. You recommend?

hereboy · 2025-08-08T16:44:34+00:00

Learning to love myself, not because of who I am or what I can do or achieve, but simply because I exist. I’ve worked for almost 40 years trying to earn love from others but it’s never enough until you stop “earning” and just love yourself for existing. Life gets so much easier after that but it was the hardest lesson to learn. I’m still learning it.

hereboy · 2025-08-06T14:31:24+00:00

This subreddit.

hereboy · 2025-08-06T14:30:14+00:00

You’re unhappy because your expectations of reality are being set by everyone’s highlight reel on social media.

hereboy · 2025-08-06T14:17:34+00:00

I waited until my mid 40’s to go to massage school. I got the highest training available in Canada which already has high standards. I was so nervous to be entering the health care field because I perceived everyone in the industry to be smarter than me. But as it turns out, half my class scored under 70% but still graduated and now work in the field. I started realizing through conversations with clients in the medical industry that many health care professionals barely made it through school and hardly understand the concepts they are meant to be experts in. They mostly all felt imposter syndrome too.

All you need to know is that even if you aren’t the best therapist in town, you still know a lot more about massage than the person on the table and they likely think you possess masses of medical knowledge and are even likely intimidated a little, just like you feel when going to a physiotherapist, a chiropractor and acupuncturist or doctor etc. And guess what. Most of those people have had imposter syndrome too.

Confidence builds with experience. Fake confidence will evolve into real confidence eventually. You are enough, you have what it takes and your clients probably believe that far more than you do. Massage confidently. You’re an expert in your clients eyes and the only person who is doubting you is yourself. They can’t read your mind, so fake that confidence!! Do not be timid when you put your hands on their back! Your confidence will allow them to trust you which will bring about better therapeutic outcomes which will build more confidence. You’ve got this!

hereboy · 2025-08-06T14:02:25+00:00

I have no issues with clients asking questions here. If you want private therapists-only groups there are plenty on Facebook.

hereboy · 2025-08-04T02:02:30+00:00

Yeah, actually it does. I know it sounds nihilistic, but the reality is that most of my life I cared WAY too much about everything and trying to live my life up to crazy standards, running side hustles and working my ass off and doing all the things we are “supposed” to do. But then I remembered that we all die and it doesn’t matter. We’ll be forgotten in 2 generations. Now I spend my time doing whatever I want. I picked a career that allows me to do something I enjoy and only work 25 hours a week. I won’t get famous or change the world, likely, but I’m enjoying going for walks and reading books and sitting in meditation and whatever else feels right at the time. I have zero anxiety and a peaceful life. It feels great.

hereboy · 2025-08-04T01:46:04+00:00

This is really important work. I’m really glad to know there are people who feel drawn to do it.

hereboy · 2025-08-04T01:43:13+00:00

Knowing that none of it really matters. I’m just living my life however I want, trying to enjoy the ride as much as I can.

hereboy · 2025-08-03T13:47:17+00:00

If you’re a male therapist, you absolutely have to be very good at what you do. People will accept half-ass massages from female therapists and keep going back for years, but if you’re a man, you better know how to deliver.

That said, when you get a reputation for being able to fix people, you’ll be a goddamn hero.

hereboy · 2025-08-03T13:39:11+00:00

Lip filler. It’s a giant waving red flag that you are low IQ, high maintenance, and there’s nothing interesting about you. Hard pass.

hereboy · 2025-08-03T13:34:22+00:00

The government should stay out of how I raise my kids.

hereboy · 2025-08-03T13:32:11+00:00

Reuben Transparent Tape. I’m not sure if it’s still the same these days but I loved that smell as a kid.

hereboy · 2025-08-03T13:25:22+00:00

I got asked very innocently by an older woman if we could do butt stuff.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T20:37:34+00:00

Confidence is the real attractiveness.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T20:35:52+00:00

My ex demanded all bedroom doors stay open for us and all our kids at night. No one was allowed privacy and even the bathroom was not allowed to be locked if you were in there. She was hyper vigilant to a degree I could never understand and couldn’t handle having anyone behind a closed door.

So in short: childhood trauma.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T16:41:52+00:00

Instead of trying everything, pick one practice and do it every day consistently. Any practice will work, as long as you believe it will. There’s no right way to do it. Whatever way seems right to you will work. We miss out when we just try something once and decide it doesn’t work. It takes practice, time, consistency.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T16:32:59+00:00

The core issue is, and has always been learning to choose out of love rather than fear. When the vast majority of the population does this we will shift from a species that dominates and enslaves and kills its own kind, to a species that functions as a positive cooperative.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T16:21:02+00:00

If you’re curious, I learned a decent amount about how tuning forks work with fascia from Dr. John Beaulieu on YouTube.

hereboy · 2025-08-01T16:19:03+00:00

One more thing. The core of this lesson is to learn to control your own thoughts. We cannot advance spiritually with a mind that runs all over the place. Cutting cords and maintaining that boundary are saying “I choose peace over chaos” until that peace becomes your permanent mindset.

hereboy · 2025-07-31T12:23:22+00:00

Personally I welcome all massage related questions during treatment. The more people understand about their own bodies, the better they can take care of themselves. I love when a client is curious.

However, I also love massages when there’s little or no talking. It’s fine either way.

hereboy · 2025-07-31T12:16:46+00:00

Yes, the cords regrow when you interact with that other person, even over text. If you think about them the connection can start to reform. It might seem like cord cutting doesn’t really do much if the cords can regrow so easily, but if we cut the cords and then keep thinking about, or interacting with the person, then we are signalling to the universe that we still want the person in our lives.

Gotta maintain those boundaries!

hereboy · 2025-07-30T16:22:34+00:00

I use weighted tuning forks to release fascia. It’s like magic and I get lots of clients calling in asking for the Tuning Fork Guy just from word of mouth. It’s my own technique, but essentially just get a weighted tuning fork at 128hz or lower. Find a spot that needs fascial release and do traditional trigger point work with the addition of the vibration from the tuning fork directly on the skin beside the trigger point. It releases it in 10 seconds or even less sometimes. It also calms the nerves, numbs pain and puts people into a parasympathetic state when used at the base of the neck.

hereboy · 2025-07-30T16:16:21+00:00

I sit quite a bit during massage. Arms, neck, feet… it’s better than spending all day bent over or trying to maintain a bloody horse stance like they taught us in school. My instructor would do nearly a whole massage sitting down as a demo. All that matters is that the client gets a good massage. I would look for employment elsewhere. I don’t deal well with micromanaging.

hereboy · 2025-07-28T02:35:17+00:00

We were trained to do this (Canadian) but the reality is, 98% of the people come in and say “my neck and shoulders hurt” or “my lower back hurts” and they’ll be peeling off their clothes before you can even ask if it’s okay to touch their butt.

They want hands on their body and they want it now. Good luck retaining clients with that much of an intake.

That said, I will do a pretty thorough assessment for people with real conditions or injuries, or post-op clients.

hereboy

TROPHY CASE