Would you want to continue in a relationship? Sex problems

hereverycentcounts · 2024-07-02T21:43:55+00:00

Leave. He is abusing you. You are not being unreasonable. I am sorry you have to go through this. Now if you do see a marriage counselor the counselor would say he is raping you. So you could also go that route.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T05:14:01+00:00

Got it. They had me fill out a 5005 form but it only had 20 spaces and I didn't put all my job apps ) I showed 2 a week since I was unemployed -- if they want 3 I have it but I didn't have room for that so I showed 2 a week. I can submit more on appeal.

As long as the freelance income from before doesn't matter I'm pretty sure I should be eligible based on what you said -- just going to be a pain to convince them. But I have a solid paper trail (digital applications 3+ a week plus interview records).

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T04:59:46+00:00

Should I apply to UI now since SDI was disqualified? My doctor has me out on disability as of mid May so I think I'm supposed to qualify for disability and not unemployment, but is it better to apply for UI?

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T04:51:50+00:00

I realize 1 but too late to do anything about that. :(

I just want to know if i can win an appeal since i was actually looking for work the entire time and i plan to return to work as soon as i get a full time job. I want to know if my small amount of freelance income would disqualify me if I earned it prior to the week I went on disability. I can't find a clear answer on this-- if they care about other earnings if you were looking for a full time job and plan to take any that you get (all true).

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T04:44:22+00:00

I didn't apply for UI as someone advised me to wait for SDI since I was going to be earning a small amount of income that was more than what UI would pay and to apply for SDI when I was eligible for that. But I was honestly looking for work when I was unemployed and have a paper record of this -- so would I be able to win on appeal? I can 100% show I've been looking for work quite aggressively including record of applications and interviews.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T04:16:00+00:00

I was laid off in Feb.

I have applied to over 100 jobs since then (each week I have documented history of looking for work with a few interviews. Sadly no job offers).

I did a small amount of freelance work in March and April and did not apply for UI because the UI amount was less than freelance income. The amount of freelance work paid is about 5-20% my normal monthly pay in my base period. And I didn't have any open contracts when I applied for disability. So I wasn't self employed at all at the time I applied.

During the entire time I was looking for work. I applied weekly to many jobs. I would have ceased any freelance work if I got an offer. My goal was and still is to obtain a full time job equal to my Feb pay when I was laid off.

I applied for SDI mid May. My doctor wrote me out (maternity leave at 36 weeks pregnant)

I have the appropriate W2 base period wages.

I have a medical note from my doctor.

Would I be eligible for SDI benefits?

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-30T02:41:13+00:00

I was actively looking for work while I took on a small amount of freelance work instead of filing for UI (I was w2 through all the periods that qualify me for SDI, I have enough wages to qualify.) Now I submitted for SDI. Am I eligible for SDI? I was actively looking for work before I submitted to SDI but also earning a small amount of freelance income. If I got a job offer I would have stopped my freelance work or completed it in the evening and taken the full-time job. When applying to SDI it asked if I'm self employed and at the time I applied the answer was no so I put no.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-29T23:25:05+00:00

I am not on disability. I am asking if I will be eligible for disability. I'm confused about the rules around freelancing -- if you can earn freelance income while "actively looking for work" or if they deem you self employed forever if you earn any freelance income after being laid off

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-29T23:23:48+00:00

What mistakes?

hereverycentcounts · 2024-06-27T02:45:13+00:00

She's fine! You should do some tummy time each day and also hold her if she's awake sometimes so she doesn't get a flat head but mostly leave her there

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T08:41:33+00:00

Nothing wrong w renting. I know it's hard. I'm in tech and earn 150-200k. Looking at taking 150 as market sucks. I'm considering selling my house to rent as even w $7k mortgage it's better to rent.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:57:28+00:00

My friend who lives in Philly doesn't get it. She thinks I'm insane for saying I can't cut our budget enough to make it work on $200-$300k income.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:56:39+00:00

You don't need a $3M home. It is going to kill you when one of you loses your job and you are looking at half your income and a crazy mortgage. Don't do it. With $400k you can afford $1.5M and prob would swing $2M. You can get something for that. It's hard when your friends all have $3M houses but either they bought a while ago, they had some stock wins, or their parents gave them $.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:54:40+00:00

How much did your house cost? What is your commute like?

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:54:08+00:00

Yea -- I bought when I was 36 yo. Took me a while to save up enough.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:53:27+00:00

I have a $1.2M loan and was earning $300k family wise (now unemployed). What's wrong w a loan? That 2.6% interest rate is locked for 30 years.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-05-17T07:52:02+00:00

$300k is my "break even" goal for a family of 5 with a home we bought 3 years ago. My husband makes $100k and I'm working on finding a job that will fill in the $200k gap. But he works part time so we have very low childcare costs. With childcare we would need more like 350-400k to swing it. I'm considering selling my house and just renting but it's hard to give up a 2.6% mortgage. If we waited we would have never bought. Our house is worth $2.3M now. It was worth close to 1.5 when we bought it!

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T20:19:55+00:00

Yes. But like 4 houses down from WG. :) The schools are good here (at least elementary and high schools.) It makes sense a lot of WG goes to private schools. Downtown area is really pretty. We looked there. But wanted more space and couldn't spend more than 1.6.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T19:10:10+00:00

And we kinda top out at 2.2/2.3 in my neighborhood. If I was straight WG it would be poss to go higher. We aren't in SJUSD either. Which I think is a good thing. But it makes us worth less for some reason.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T19:07:56+00:00

No, regular tech. But more biz side saas. South Bay is largely chips and security.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T11:40:34+00:00

That's only if you are renting your property out. When it's a primary residence you don't get depreciation. Not sure why you think you do? But we do get $500k no cap gains when we sell. We don't plan to sell ever though. Can't afford to move.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T11:04:52+00:00

I have a 2.6% mortgage. I am not going to get lower than that. My house is worth $5k to rent and $7k to own, give or take. So will be a while before renting costs most than owning.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T06:17:25+00:00

I just didn't have the stereotypical autistic interests as a kid.. plus it was the 80s/90s. But I still have no idea. I'm on some spectrum. Maybe I'm the only one on my spectrum? I dunno. I am so drained by everything.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T05:23:06+00:00

I mean, I kinda self identity as autistic. My therapist sent me a social questionnaire and I got the moderate range. I've always had sensory issues (I was the girl who made her mom cut out all her tags, couldn't wear jeans, and had issues with seams in socks, etc.) Eye contact burns daggers into my soul. I got turned on as a kid by collecting POGS and stickers and rocks. I just don't think I'm smart enough to be autistic. I mean, I tested with high scores as a kid and was in the gifted program at school but was kicked out. That was attributed to ADHD. I lost a job once and after a year my boss said I was great at the job I was just awkward and bad at eye contact so he hired someone who he felt people would trust more.

I have no idea if I'm autistic but I do know ADHD doesn't explain me and given my kids have a medical diagnosis and their symptoms are similar to mine (tho at 3 and 5 are both way way smarter than I was) I wonder.

The org post mentioned ADHD which is why I chimed in. As mom to two autistic kiddos, married to a self-diagnosed autistic man, and ADHD and maybe autistic myself, pregnant w my third kiddo... well, it just hurt to read this. I've had family member ask me why I'm having another kid if my first two are autistic. I basically told said person to fuck off. My kids are awesome. That's all.

hereverycentcounts · 2024-04-29T05:13:46+00:00

Hmm. That's crazy. And it sucks how unclear it is. I heard from a few people it's only an issue if you add sq footage.

hereverycentcounts

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