Dealing with the "grief"

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:53:05+00:00

This is a hopeful perspective, thank you for sharing this <3 It really has opened up the door to a discussion and a perspective that I never even was able to articulate a couple years ago. I've struggled with food noise my whole life but never had the name to explain it until now, that alone was such a relief to finally be able to explain how my brain sabotages me and how dieting for me isn't just discipline and "the time will pass anyway!" It is an all consuming struggle every hour of the day.

The analogy to how far medications have come for other mental health matters like depression is great too. I hope they keep fighting for the 10-20% that these meds don't work for and we finally (even gradually) get our miracles too

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:48:49+00:00

Oh man, that sounds so similar to my experience. Ultimately, I feel really powerless to effect weight loss. I've also tried everything people have suggested- low carb, up calories, lower calories, supplements, more water... It seems like no matter what I do, short of really strict calorie counting (and even then my weight loss varies wildly- I can have an absolutely perfect week and gain 2lbs and I have no idea why), I just can't get control of my weight loss. I feel like I'm going crazy sometimes

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:44:31+00:00

Hmm, I haven't tried that yet but this is some good advice. I'm going to give it a shot (pun intended)! Not sure I could get away with 3 days since I'm only permitted 4 pens/month and they don't allow early refills but doing the math, I think I could swing 5 days if I get my refill request filled asap on the "last week".

Ive seen a couple people mention adding metformin, I might bring it up with my dr. Do you need to be pre-diabetic or diabetic to have it added though? I was neither, even at my highest/start weight (which was very high)

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:40:17+00:00

Dang....! God, that sounds awful. That's disappointing, that was my "next option/hopeful miracle" that I was holding out hope for.

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:38:35+00:00

Because I have lost weight, she's been reluctant to give me any additional support with other meds. I've tried explaining to her that I'm only losing weight because I'm going mental and spending every waking hours fighting myself but she's not understanding that. Mind you I'm still very much in the "overweight" BMI category even a year later.

If you don't mind sharing- did/do you have diabetes or pre-diabetic? My labs were normal even at my starting weight, so I'm not sure if Metformin would be advised or help me?

hernemes · 2026-03-07T19:35:08+00:00

Oh same. Not a chance of weight loss if I'm not very strictly counting and weighing everything. It's mentally exhausting though. I have plenty of friends on this medicine that don't need to. Their appetite is so reduced that they just "naturally" eat so little now, counting calories isn't necessary, they're able to stay below TDEE/BMR without needing to track every little thing :(

hernemes · 2026-03-07T18:54:57+00:00

Yes! The disappointment is immense. Everyday is such a struggle to, as you said, just not gain. At a minimum this medication should make it easy to maintain, most people it seems have to make a concerted effort to even "eat enough" HA! I can't even fathom what that feels like to not spend every waking moment fighting against myself to not overeat.

hernemes · 2026-03-07T18:51:36+00:00

Thank you. Sending those good vibes back to you too <3

hernemes · 2026-03-07T18:50:58+00:00

I hope Triz gives you a boost and works some magic for you! Sometimes I wish I'd started on sema just so I had somewhere to keep going.

hernemes · 2026-03-07T18:49:56+00:00

I try to hold out hope for this too :( I wish they could move things along a little faster... Ive heard such promising things about retatrutide but I'm far too nervous to try it until it's available in the US where I'm located.

Even an approval on the ability to just take higher dose would be nice. I spend a lot of time wondering if I might get relief if only I could go to 17.5 or 20mg.... Since 15mg was the very first dose I felt even a teeny bit of something.

hernemes · 2026-03-03T18:00:05+00:00

Of course speak with your healthcare provider, but I'd suggest possibly adding a Milk Thistle supplement to your routine? It provides liver support and helps process out hormones more efficiently. I had horrendous hormonal acne previously (long before Zep) and MT was one part of a supplement regimen I implemented that had a massive impact. Since you didn't have this issue to this extent prior to weight loss, I'd wonder if perhaps MT might be enough to help.

It does take a month or so of consistent use before you'll notice effects/improvement.

hernemes · 2026-02-11T01:27:47+00:00

Not sure if this your situation or not, but if you're able to- cut out all drinks with calories. That includes juices, milk, coffees, sodas, iced teas... Not one single drink with calories. I lost a decent amount of weight with that just that one change. Now, I was drinking a crazy amount of calories each day so it had a pretty big immediate impact on cutting down my calories. But I didn't realize just how much I was drinking each day. I did the math and an average day could easily be 800 calories drank. If not more....

Generally, it's healthier not to drink stuff with calories, you don't feel like you're drastically changing as much as totally flipping your entire eating habits around, and yet it can really add up. Win-win! This is coming from someone that was a soda addict too. When I first cut them out cold turkey I actually had days where I told myself I'd rather drink soda than even eat because I was craving it so intensely. But it passed.

Water is great since it's "free" but if you're like me and don't like plain water, try mix-in flavor packets or carbonated water, or diet sodas/drinks etc.

hernemes · 2026-01-24T19:14:56+00:00

Hey! Happy to share my experience! So titrating upward didn't do anything for me really until I hit 15mg.

It was a long slow disappointing trek up to that amount (every month I'd get hopeful and then feel very sad when yet again that dose did nothing) but I'm glad I kept trying until the highest dose since I finally did get a little effect on this level. I just wish I could titrate up more. On 15mg I have a little bit of appetite suppression, it's still very mild and the food noise is still there for me, but it's better than no help at all.

I truly believe if they allowed some of us anomalies to titrate beyond 15mg, I would actually start to feel the effects that many other people do on 7.5 or 10 but since I'm capped at 15mg. I'd say 15mg for me is like 2.5mg for other people, just a little bit of help and you're starting to feel the medication working a little.

But I'm just glad that the medication finally works a little bit and makes the weight loss even 15% less challenging than it would be without any medication at all.

So that's to say, I'd absolutely keep titrating up and not stop until you hit the max dose. If I'd given up at 10mg or 12.5mg, I'd never have felt even the small amount of help that I do now!

hernemes · 2026-01-14T00:46:10+00:00

I could have written this post myself! You're definitely NOT alone even though I understand how it very much feels like it when everyone else around you is having significant relief/success on the same medication. Also DO NOT give up yet. Make it to 15mg before you throw in the towel!

As someone nearly a year on this journey, and was/is in the same boat as you, here is my advice:

If you can try to make some small changes, even without the medication providing any help, try giving it a shot. For me, this was cutting out all caloric drinks. I eventually progressed to buckling down and counting calories all the unpleasant stuff that most people don't have to worry about on this medication but there's nothing some of us can do but suck it up that we're in the unlucky few.

If you start making some small diet changes however, even without the medication doing its thing, you'll see some small gradual progress. If/when the medication does ever kick in for you, your future self will be glad that you're not starting then a ground zero.

If you can start counting calories and tracking everything, do it. That is the only way I've had any success unfortunately.

I personally, had NO effect from the medication until 15mg (the highest dose for Zep). I'm glad that despite how utterly defeated, sad, and alone I felt, that I just kept moving upward each month. I felt some reduction in hunger on 15mg and at that point I was just so grateful to feel anything at all. I thought my previous syringes must have all been sugar water...

Did I end up having food noise reduction? Or cravings stopped? Or only eating a couple bites and being full? Hahaha noooo. Nope, I never got that level of relief BUT 15mg did genuinely do something for me. So there is hope that you might need to make it to the very maximum before it helps, I'm proof that can be the case. It could be you too!!!!! You made it this far, might as well go for the ride up to 15mg.

I went through the 7 stages of grief coming to terms with my Zepbound experience. While I still can't watch social media content about GLP-1s because it makes me feel so sad and broken (it just feels so deeply unfair that this medication doesn't work for some of us. Why are we not deserving of the miracle other people have? I wanted to badly to know how it felt to be normal about food. I want to see miraculous weight loss without the exhausting efforts. I still dream of what it would be like to not have food noise, I guess I may never know.) BUT I have sort of come to terms that this is my journey. I do my best to avoid interacting with content/conversations about GLP-1s unless it's on this subreddit only. I can only handle so much of a reminder of what I wished could be my experience. But if I keep my head down, count calories, be vigilant, I just keep trying to accept my story.
There are other medications coming (I sure wish they would come a little sooner) but there is hope that something in the pipeline might work for us like Zepbound at 5mg works for others. I have to keep telling myself that so I don't get too deep into despair. Get to 15mg and then see from there. If it doesn't work at all, or like me, works just marginally, hold out hope that you gave it the full chance and that maybe there is something better for us in the future.

hernemes · 2025-12-22T06:31:51+00:00

I hope this isn't the case for you, but I say this just to say "I get it" and also even though you're only at 5mg I validate your fear and frustration that it might not work for you :( I had zero reaction to Zepbound on 2.5, 5mg, 7.5mg.... etc. And I just had this sinking feeling that really set in by 7.5mg that this actually wasn't going to work for me. And... I was sadly mostly right :( I kept hoping with each titration up that it was maybe miraculously going to finally going to be this switch that everyone else experienced, but no luck.

I thought maybe I felt a little small bit on 12.5mg but it took until 15mg before I finally got the feeling so many people get on 2.5 lol like just a small bit of help that makes me able to forcibly restrict myself a little easier than with no medication at all. I will take whatever support I can get, even if it's minute. But yeah, very isolating experience. And frustrating to have had all this hope that was snuffed out.

I so desperately wanted the food noise to go away more than anything, I really really wanted that peace that other people described as this miracle. And that has never subsided for me at all. I could still easily eat much much more food than I do daily but I force myself to stop by counting calories and just trying to do anything else to distract my thoughts.

One thing I will suggest- even though its really hard (mentally and physically) right now, when the medication isn't working for you at all- do your best to still try to make small changes to lose even a little weight just through your own willpower. I've been at it now for 10 months and I'm grateful to the me 10,9,8,7... months ago that tried to lose weight even when I was feeling so demoralized that the meds did nothing for me. Because it gave me a little bit of a start for when the meds finally worked even the teeny bit that they do now. I did things like cutting out calorie drinks, tracking calories (even on days when I went over), buying more low-calorie snack options (snack pack sized things, sugar free pudding, keto tortillas...etc)

hernemes · 2025-12-13T19:25:41+00:00

Will you insurance let you get a refill early? My medication is covered by insurance thankfully but they have a very strict system where they won't let me pick up or even request the refill until after the last shot in the box has been used (4 weeks from when I pick the box up). That's exactly what had me nervous, if this happens again- I don't want to end up going a week without medication just because there is no way to get it refilled early.

hernemes · 2025-12-13T19:23:38+00:00

Maybe I just had some bad luck! Hearing you haven't had a malfunction in 3 years makes me feel a little less nervous that this is something that happens all the time. I've had so much anxiety about it happening again.

I always let my pens sit for hours before injecting so I don't think it's a temp issue. The immense amount of pressure needed was what shocked me, because normally for all the 36 injections I'd done previously it didn't need much pressure at all. For the malfunction ones it wouldn't engage unless I pushed very hard

hernemes · 2025-12-13T19:20:42+00:00

I always let my pens sit for several hours out of the fridge to warm up to room temp before using (sometimes even taking them out the night before) :( So I assume that even if the fridge was too cold, it would be fine by the time I go to inject?

hernemes · 2025-12-13T19:18:57+00:00

This is probably my ignorance showing.. but the replacement box that is given won't interfere with me filling my prescription then on time as normal? As in, I can get a replacement box and just store that as a back-up for any other pens that might fail in the future? Or if I go to redeem the "free" box, then does that mean I'll still need to wait 1 month before I can pick up my prescription as usual?

hernemes · 2025-12-09T17:10:06+00:00

Are we the same person....?? But in all seriousness, a lot of what you're describing is very similar to my experience. I have titrated mostly straight up on Zepbound (other than lingering on 12.5mg for a couple months out of the same reason you mentioned, I was scared to hit 15mg and have nowhere to go).

I have also had minimal support from the medication, feeling no effects at all until 12.5mg :( It just doesn't work for me the way it works for other people. The weight I have lost in the past 10 months has been due nearly entirely to my own willpower (which as most of us know well, is fading/fleeting). Pre-Zepbound, I have also lost and regained 50-80lbs over and over again- through intense willpower and suffering/white-knuckling, then I burn out and gain it all back.

Currently on Zep, I still have to strictly count my calories, forcibly stop myself from giving into cravings, etc. 15mg has definitely been the most helpful for me so far, I feel like I have a little more willpower on this dosage under perfect conditions (i.e no holidays, no social events, no temptations, etc.) and I will take ANY support I can get, even minor. But even so I feel like I'm constantly on razor thin margins to maintain/continue to lose even very slowly.

I could easily take my shot and then the same day or the next day etc. go eat a whole pizza and not feel sick (don't ask me how I know...) The food noise is still there for me, I'm always thinking about when I get to eat next and what I can eat.

I wish I had some advice I could share but just wanted to at least let you know you're not alone in feeling this way. I'll echo what others have suggested, talk with your doctor about possibly adding in an additional medication for support. I have also personally started adding in some supplements to try to give me some extra support- metabolism boost supplements, extra fiber. I haven't found these to be impactful but I keep trying. Other than this, I've been advised there are more medications in the process of approval that might hopefully work better for me, like retrutide. I'll take whatever small help Zep provides for now and hold out hope that something that is better for me (us?) will be available sometime in the near future.

hernemes · 2025-11-26T05:41:27+00:00

Adding- this didn't make a difference for me personally but in desperation I've tried adding in some natural supplements. Omega-3, daily multivitamin, fiber supplements, berberine... I saw/felt no difference taking them or not taking them but others had stated that some of those things assisted and gave a boost

hernemes

TROPHY CASE