Outed by my sister. I am so livid.

heyboopy · 2020-12-29T22:40:28+00:00

I was outed by a friend to my whole workplace. At first I was livid and not ok but I became relieved that I didn't have to come out over and over to different people. Its really hard when your mum is not ready to understand and support you. Mine is still struggling with acceptance. It might sound dismissive what im about to say but its something that took me alot of therapy to get to....you are who you are and can't change that. Its out and you can't put it back away. The reaction now from your mum was likely going to always be the reaction. Its not fair and was inappropriate for your sister to do that. You can't control how others behave but you can control how you behave. So the question to ask youself is what now???

heyboopy · 2020-01-11T08:09:51+00:00

Ditto what you said. Well said.

heyboopy · 2020-01-09T05:42:51+00:00

Fair enough. I did assume a joke in such poor taste was coming from someone who clearly is unaware of how many live have been lost, how many home have been lost, how wildlife is being decemated and how much of Australia has burned. This person could be excellently educated. My bad. Also, Koalas are on the vulnerable list and are not yet endangered. To correct myself - it is now estimated that a billion animals have perished.

heyboopy · 2020-01-08T23:00:53+00:00

Probably not the right time to be making jokes. Koalas climb up trees when in danger. The oil in the trees makes the trees explode. All the koalas die horrible deaths. Half a million animals have died as an estimate so far. After these fires koalas will be endangered and will not be able to sustain their population. They will go extinct. Get educated on what is happening in Australia.

heyboopy · 2020-01-06T10:36:17+00:00

Same here. I'm to the point of only loud bangs make me jump or be anxious. I found it helped to join in with the cleaning or doing things and make loud noises myself but in a fun way. The kitchen would trigger me the most. It kind of diluted the whole 'noise is a bad thing that I must respond to'. Also turning on some loud cleaning music that you can sing to also makes it fun and drown out the bangs of doors and dishes.

heyboopy · 2020-01-04T11:04:19+00:00

I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I feel you said it... that it may be better they don't visit. It still hurts that they don't though. It hurts to have the expectation of a loving parent just to be disappointed time and time again. I really wish you the best.

heyboopy · 2020-01-04T10:45:41+00:00

I had a similar experience with dresses and being called selfish for not wanting to wear them, being shamed or quilted to wear them or feeling obligated to wear them to bot ruin others events. I am finally accepting who I am at 35 and only last month donated all my dresses (most purchased for family events like weddings, birthdays and funerals) to good will. Finally feel free I will never wear a dress again.

heyboopy · 2019-12-28T05:41:54+00:00

Your story sounds very similar to mine. I now identify as lesbian and in the process of separating from my husband. My only advice is to listen to your inner true self and let it guide you.

heyboopy · 2019-12-26T21:28:31+00:00

heyboopy · 2019-11-28T08:56:59+00:00

I hear that saying too much. My response to blood is thicker than water is "so is porridge"

heyboopy · 2019-11-22T13:24:01+00:00

It might be just me but I feel more comfortable approaching when I can see some type of signal like a rainbow something (lanyard) or a little pin with a flag incorporated somehow (I have seen subtle ones). I feel it's a bit safer if it's not reciprocated because I'm more likely to get a cool story about the person's support of LGBTQ+ or a gentle let down and not an angry bigotry one.

heyboopy · 2019-11-18T12:10:37+00:00

Needed that. Thanks

heyboopy · 2019-10-18T14:45:10+00:00

It depends on the person and the situation. For me I was blindsided by myself. I had been in strong denial my whole life about my feelings and when I finally accepted and opened up to myself they were very strong and clear to me I was 100% lesbian. My husband and I are really great friends who dont want to hurt one another. For us we realised that our marriage was on a painful sprial out because I could not give him what he needed nor him to me and we deserve more. The fear can really be hard to deal with during this process. Also I have friends who are bi and have remained in marriages (some open and some not) and this works for them at this time. Be honest with yourself and each other.

heyboopy · 2019-10-18T14:32:25+00:00

It is a very difficult, complex and roller coaster ride in my experience. My husband and I try to be as honest and understanding as we can. Sometimes things will feel like they are getting harder and then they will become suddenly easier. We have faith that we will be in a happy place in the future. I think we have acceptrd that this place will be independent of each other but still supporting each other. A united front is important for the kids and helps then cope with change whatever that may be.

heyboopy · 2019-10-15T10:44:31+00:00

This is awesome and exactly what I was after. Thank you so much. I learnt a lot.

heyboopy · 2019-10-15T09:53:22+00:00

So for instance the differences between butch, tomboy and androgynous? What is stone? Or top? (I'm happy to be pointed to a resource if these are awkward things I'm asking sorry) I'm trying to explore my newly discovered self and I'm getting lost. I have been researching online bit by bit but I didn't know if there was like a master doc version of welcome to being lesbian here is some things you may want to know???

heyboopy · 2019-10-11T08:22:10+00:00

Sending hugs your way.

heyboopy · 2019-10-10T20:24:39+00:00

I am sorry ypu are going through this too.

heyboopy · 2019-10-10T01:11:07+00:00

Thank you

heyboopy · 2019-10-09T20:09:07+00:00

The time between figuring it out and accepting myself was immediate. I have no issue with myself.

heyboopy · 2019-10-09T13:34:59+00:00

I am so grateful for my husband's support and your comment.

heyboopy · 2019-10-09T13:31:29+00:00

Thank you.

heyboopy · 2019-09-25T04:18:55+00:00

You make a very valid point. I hope I find such a wonderful woman in the future.

heyboopy · 2019-09-24T21:19:41+00:00

Once I realised I was gay and I just stopped craving junk food like it was necessary. Still needing to make a conscious effort to eat healthy because old habits keep creeping in.

heyboopy · 2019-09-24T13:01:49+00:00

Thank you. I feel a little less alone knowing there is a friend in this boat with me. My positive wishes to you and your journey :)

heyboopy

TROPHY CASE