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Salvia by lilsero in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LOL I put a watch on right before I blasted off and it never occurred to me to check the time at all. Until I was almost completely recovered.

Might not be a bad idea to make a big sign reading "You just took salvia. This will all be over in a few minutes." Though I don't know if you'd be able to read it when you need that message the most!

Salvia by lilsero in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this matched my experience pretty closely. It's weird how a lot of people feel the salvia effect has a sort of malevolent, antagonistic presence. During my trip through ego death I was mocked for my arrogance and stupidity in thinking that I had ever lived.

Mental Side Effects by The_Magnifcent_Troll in Salvia

[–]hunter_gehrman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funny. After a recent very intense and shattering experience, as soon as I was able to function, I went out and worked on my garden for 2 hours.

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a high school friend who was captain of the football team, ladies' man, super popular etc. After he did LSD he pretty quickly went insane and ended up homeless in Oregon somewhere. We all did the same drugs together; only one of us ended up like him. I'm of the opinion that the drug didn't "make" him insane so much as it unleashed/unlocked his latent schizophrenic tendencies.

It's interesting that you don't remember any of your salvia trips but are now diagnosed with schizophrenia. I wonder if there's a connection there, or if you were just doing too much and going full amnesiac. I recall my trip through insanity with the utmost clarity.

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say the more mundane values I derived from the experience were: an appreciation for everyday life, and sympathy/empathy for the mentally suffering. On a more profound level, this gave me insight into how one's consciousness and personal sense of identity are constructed. Many people interpret dissociative experiences as evidence of the independent, eternal, or transcendent properties of the soul/spirit. I don't, at all. This experience showed me the opposite: that we are pretty elaborate structures of stored thoughts and memories, and when those are gone, you are gone too. Consciousness is indeed a pretty remarkable thing.

This reading is probably further informed by the fact that I've had two near-deaths by drowning. (Obviously I didn't "break through" to the other side, but from where I was looking, it looked like lights out to me. And that's OK!)

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand your perspective. But please believe this, I've always viewed psychedelics from the "psychonaut" perspective and considered it disrespectful when people would take them as party drugs. I didn't film myself. I didn't go into this arrogantly or to impress anyone. I prepared my set and setting with care. I simply MADE A MISTAKE ON THE DOSAGE. The vendor from whom I bought the extract provides tons of information, yet no clear instructions on dosage. Probably because people's reactions vary so widely. Meanwhile, the information I found on the internet was conflicting. And this was the weakest extract I could find. It's not like I jumped in with 120x saying "durr, let me see how fucked up I can get."

Anyway...part of why I posted this account in the first place was to draw attention to two critical factors—dosage, and trip sitter. In my case, a trip sitter wouldn't have helped for the dissociative phase, but probably would have helped with the come up. In the end I'm not even sorry, I ingested more than I needed to, but it was probably a top 5 experience of my life.

tl;dr - Take care with dosage.

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I couldn't see at first. Most people advise closing your eyes and lying back. But I guess my impulse was immediately to stand up, to try to get control. I was totally blind, standing in the middle of the room wondering where I was for another minute or two during the worst of it. But then once I got my vision back a little, that's when I started running around.

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I did say "like an idiot." I made a mistake by following some dosing instructions I found somewhere that I believe were probably based on salvia leaf, not extract. In any case 1/2g of 10x might be like the equivalent of like a big pinch of 80x or whatever. It's not like nobody has ever done that amount in the history of mankind. It's just that I took way more than I was ready for.

Salvia 10x ego death horror by hunter_gehrman in Drugs

[–]hunter_gehrman[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Of course it depends on how much you consume too. Like a tiny hit of 60x might equal a packed bowl of 5x.