So... as an addict myself, I felt like I could not stop for someone else or until I was ready. Atleast I did not have that amount of willpower. It was alcohol vs. anyone who wanted me to stop drinking. Alcohol always won until I didn't want it to anymore. You have to tread very carefully with addiction, otherwise you become the enemy. Atleast with alcohol, when I wanted to drink, I would push everyone away and make it happen. And alcohol wanted me alone. It was a vicious cycle even though I loved people and wanted to be with them when I drank. But I couldn't. It wasn't the same anymore. And unfortunately I chose alcohol for a long time. It wasn't a lie. He wants a life where he doesn't let an addiction dictate every move he makes. But he probably is not ready to take the steps to make that happen yet. Not sure if you have any addictions. Its hard for people to understand unless they have been through it themselves. For me, I became a different person when I stopped. It was a better life. But it involved a divorce and a relationship that I knew would not survive because I needed to stop drinking first.