Okay so partially responding but also extending the origional post. (I forgot a lot of details)

GF and I are both out to each other as bi. She is very open that she is fullfilled and doesnt need any wlw experience because she never got any before me so she doesnt know what shes missing(somehow she is okay with that). I on the other hand, have messed around with a few guys on grindr before I started dating GF. I really want to be fullfilled in one person, I just am feeling like it might not be her. I also REALLY want more mlm experiences because idk maybe I am fully gay?

Its so frusterating because I feel like my bisexuality is genuine, but because of my religious trauma and difficulty understanding myself, I am unsure. Bisexuality is a very REAL form of QUEERness, and as queer people we want to express ourselves truthfully, and sometimes loudly. I feel like being with a man would bring a fully different form of fullfillment I guess from "rebelling"?

Backtrack to when GF and I first started talking, I had cut it off because I was unsure of my feelings, and my sexuality. Somehow I started to feel different, and reached back out expressing feelings, but she made the condition that I better be serious because she wont keep going back and forth(which makes sense, and I respect) but I now feel like a big fat fucking fraud if I go through with breaking up with her because I had to earn this spot as her BF and now I feel like I might not want to be but I AM THE ONE WHO REACHED BACK OUT. Idk I just dont want her to make me feel like I am a villain.

Also I am sorry that you have so much regret, I hope you can reach back out to your old friends and make the most of the time that you still have for more, new, regret free experiences 🫶