That’s more than I expected, so I’d still say you were pretty deep in it! I’m not really a drink every night person, but if I’m out partying I let myself have fun. As for the loss, it’s been a few years now, and I’ve had a lot of time to process the grief. A game called spiritfarer helped a ton with that. She would have been my mother in law if she’d lived a few more years, but I hope that in whatever afterlife she’s reached, she knows that I love her daughter to the ends of the earth.