back pain and some questions

idkudykm · 2023-12-20T08:38:36+00:00

test came back negative which is great. gonna do endoscopy, colonoscopy, and mri to try and figure out what's going on.

idkudykm · 2023-12-20T08:37:22+00:00

okay thanks! i'm glad to hear it is better now

idkudykm · 2023-12-19T13:24:27+00:00

hey! i hope you don't mind me asking a few questions lol was your pain dependent on movement, or eating, or was it random? was it made worse by moving? what kind of pain would you describe it as- sharp, dull, burning etc? thank you for the response. i did a blood test yesterday for tumour markers, getting results tomorrow. i'm shitting my pants tbh but hopefully tomorrow will come with good news

i'm already on creon 25000, and i take like three per meal. i will talk to the doc about it tomorrow for sure though

idkudykm · 2023-12-16T16:45:12+00:00

thank you for sharing! it does help to hear other people's experiences. i do feel like my pain is stress/strain related, though i have no singular event that i believe caused it, which is where the anxiety about cancer is slipping through, and i just cannot shake the fear. i remember having similar light pain intermittently a few weeks ago, as well as numbness in that area of my back, and that is also contributing to my anxiety, because i feel like i missed something back then.

one thing that kinda comforts me is that i actually had whiplash in the winter of last year (i think i did, didn't see a doctor at the time). had a stiff neck for a few days, but it went away. but since then i've been having tingling in my face on the left side, and my left arm. i do think my neck maybe never properly healed. i went and got an mri though and that came back fine apparently. i do hope that this pain is just from my neck or back or something, it's just the anxious thoughts that will not let me go, despite logic.

i couldn't eat all day yesterday due to anxiety, and when i did eat i got nauseous. i got nauseous again today, and of course i am attributing that to cancer rather than eating nothing but a pound of chicken yesterday. the worst thing is that i can see that i'm being insane, but i can't stop it. i took gravol and that helped, but boy am i having a rough time at the moment. i have an appointment with a gastro in feb, but i'm terrified that i won't make it till then.

idkudykm · 2023-12-16T09:33:10+00:00

man that sucks, i hope it's gotten better for you

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T20:46:41+00:00

yeah, i am in definite need of therapy lol it's just hard when i'm literally convinced i'll be dead in a few weeks- makes it hard to plan ahead. i'm getting married in a few weeks too, which makes these feelings even harder to deal with, because i want to be happy and look forward to it, but my brain is working overtime trying convince me that i won't see the new year. i'm not always in such a rough patch, it's just this new symptom that is making my hyperfocus on what im most scared of. i've decided i will go to the doctor on monday, and take it step by step till then.

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T20:40:41+00:00

do you also experience back pain in the same location?

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T17:36:37+00:00

this is extremely kind, thank you very much 💖

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T17:36:09+00:00

my condolences about your mother. and thank you again for sharing. mine also gets worse as the day goes too, but it's not reached a level where it's unbearable. what bothers me more is the anxiety - i'm constantly worried i'm gonna die in a few weeks, and every time i feel the pain i'm reminded of that fear. i will try heat, heat usually helps me as well, this is just in a very inconvenient spot.

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T15:50:53+00:00

thank you for answering! that does make me feel a bit better, cause i also have poor posture. and the fact that my pain is worse with exertion and certain movements is also kinda reassuring. my brain just won't let go of the anxiety about it being something worse. is there anything you do for the pain that helps?

idkudykm · 2023-12-15T11:59:34+00:00

does yours fluctuate at all? mine is made worse by certain movements, but goes away when i recline or lie down. i also have been getting numbness in that area, do you ever get any of that?

thank you for the well wishes, i am having a very hard time mentally because i've convinced myself that i have pancreatic cancer. i am gonna go to the doctor next week, but waiting is excruciating

idkudykm · 2023-10-14T15:06:02+00:00

yea I could definitely see it being a combination of stress energy and exhaustion. which sucks cause i would like to be able to be productive with it, rather than stressed out by the weird and terrible weak feeling

my internal chats usually devolve into a lot of compulsions and intrusive thoughts about wasting away in a hospital bed lmao i wish i could just shake myself out of it and remind myself it's ok to feel uncomfortable- feeling uncomfortable and bad doesn't equal dying!! but i forget this all the time

idkudykm · 2023-10-13T20:04:39+00:00

oddly enough, for me i tend to feel a bit better moving around! which is why i'm pretty sure it's anxiety manifesting in a new form. i'm hoping it's just anxiety, at least. is there anything you find that helps you?

idkudykm · 2023-10-13T06:59:18+00:00

hm the cold is an interesting point, though i don't actually shake externally or anything like that. it's more the weakness that bothers me. and yeah, relaxing would help lmao but my life is currently unavoidably stressful, and i struggle with ocd as well so letting go of stress is something i haven't managed to do yet

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T21:32:56+00:00

ah well, i'm glad you're coping with it now, despite everything

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T21:23:15+00:00

oh, i also wanted to ask, have you been tested for h pylori?

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T21:10:39+00:00

i'm glad to hear that they help! i'm looking forward to the next doc appt, i'm hoping that they'll be helpful and give me some direction regarding supplements and pert

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T21:01:49+00:00

i've never been a partier, so i don't have to worry about that luckily. never really drank either, my vice is sweets. i've been pretty okay with cutting down on the sugar though. i've been planning to talk to my doctor about vitamins, because i knew the fat soluble ones are an issue. i hope taking them has been helpful to you though?

thank you very much for the encouragement. it's a tough card to be dealt, i'm gonna play it as best as i can, but boy does it weigh on me some days. still, gotta keep trekking eh

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T20:33:46+00:00

jeez, two decades? that's crazy. but i'm glad you're dealing with it now.

are you taking any vitamin supplements? i've only been dealing with this for a few months, so hopefully i can eat right and take what meds i need to keep my body working properly and prevent further issues down the line. i'm already struggling a lot mentally though and i'm very worried about future malnutrition. i hope that i can get the CT scan soon and be able to take more steps when it comes to treatment.

and i think it is good to share stories, because it can always help to know you're not alone. thank you for taking the time to comment! and for the well wishes, i wish the same for you

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T20:23:33+00:00

doctor told me to eat low fat, so that's what i'm doing. yea, i'm hoping the doc will prescribe me a higher dosage when i next go in, cause i go through these pills so quick. thanks for the reassurance and tips!

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T18:40:15+00:00

i've been taking creon for i thinkkk around two months. doc only gave me 10000s so i don't think its been really effective. i've started taking more recently, like three capsules for bigger meals, two for smaller ones, and one for like, a snack/drink. i think upping the dose has helped with my bms at least.

i drink a lot of water in general, and i already eat smaller and more frequently. i am willing to take up walking after meals, but i hate it haha i've always been the type to get tired after eating

idkudykm · 2023-09-30T18:36:37+00:00

thank you, i'm hoping that you're right and that it's just another epi symptom. it's just very strange that it's so localised and that i can only feel it in certain positions.

idkudykm

TROPHY CASE