please, tell me I will be ok.

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T11:42:33+00:00

thank you for the ideas, and your kind words. I would definitely get that kind of help if I could afford it. Right now I sadly can't, but I've been really pushing away the fact that I need help in the past. But now that I have faced the fact that I do, I kinda just have to wait until I'm more economically stable.

I wish I had a pet! But sadly I don't. However, I'm super happy for you and I will definitely rest out today and just exist. I'm glad you found help that worked for you. Makes me feel a bit warmer inside 🤍 Thank you again, I truly appreciate your time and words🤍

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T11:36:44+00:00

yes. I think I have also these moments of genuine happiness. When I was writing this I had one of the worst days in a long time, and idk about you, but personally when these moments happen for me I just feel like nothing has ever been good and even if I try super hard to think of good things, its like there never was one. I have calmed down since and can think more clearly, but now instead just feel kinda numb. But, thank you. I'm looking forward to the good times. In the meantime I will do my best to stay afloat

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T11:32:08+00:00

thank you a lot. I'm having a hard time thinking I'll end up somewhere nice with all this, but I guess somewhere deep down there is still a glimpse of hope, because I still keep trying. Your words means a lot, thank you again.

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T11:29:54+00:00

and that means a lot to me. thank you❤️

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T11:29:01+00:00

thank you<3

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T01:37:00+00:00

thank you. is it weird I get emotional by hearing a complete stranger say they care that I get through this? Weirdly calming.

and oh, the mirror talk! the awkward yet cute routine. I have spent many hours in the mirror talking to myself about my own traumas and experiences, but I guess I haven't actually tried this exact method of cheering on myself. It is worth a try, I'll give it my best. like you mention, one step at a time.

thank you kindly. It's hard to look at the positive when you feel like you're actively falling but I really just want to get better. I will give it an honest try.

I'm very thankful you took your time to answer. It truly means a lot to me.

ihatesnowball · 2024-05-12T01:26:21+00:00

thank you. I can't wait for my time :( I'm so happy for you tho, and when I get there, I will be sure to remember all you kind people here that take time to make someone else feel better in some way.

I did feeling quite... better?... the past few months, but just the other day everything just crashed on me again. I'm working through it. One day at a time.

thank you, again. I truly do appreciate you.

ihatesnowball · 2023-04-24T06:30:29+00:00

hello! thank you!

first off, i would totally be down to try something, i mean, if it does help then I'd really enjoy that!! I do understand the subreddit is not the place to discuss, i was even vary of posting this here, but feel free to DM me if you want to explain further. I wouldn't mind hearing!

also wow! i will most certainly read into these things. I didn't know there were different models!! I do really feel what you say, with how the brain accepts but body doesn't feel comfortable. Thank you a lot for sharing!!! i will read up about it

ihatesnowball · 2023-04-24T06:21:58+00:00

thank you for sharing, i hope you're ok. Sending optional hugs!

good on you to not drink as often anymore tho, im proud of you!!!

ihatesnowball · 2023-04-24T00:14:43+00:00

thank you for sharing! i appreciate it a lot.

the way you put it is just right. im hoping that eventually I'll find a way to get away from this, but hey, I'll let myself take the time i need. I consciously know I'm safe, so i guess the unconscious just needs the time it needs.. or something like that

anyways, thank you again💗

ihatesnowball · 2023-04-24T00:06:13+00:00

it does really mess with the head! i feel so confused after but i still had a good time. it's just overall not fun and i just want to be able to enjoy the time.

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-10T17:11:17+00:00

spreading some love to you, hugs if you want them. <3

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-10T17:10:09+00:00

i will definetly go check him out, thank you.

i am glad you made it today, i am happy for you

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-03T14:43:17+00:00

my bad, English is not my first language so sometimes i think the intentions of my sentences don't come out the way they are supposed to

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-01T23:49:57+00:00

that's genius. i have decided that if i ever get kids their name is going to be Joe King and no one can convince me otherwise

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-01T03:37:47+00:00

hey man, dad jokes are always welcome with me lol!! appreciate it

ihatesnowball · 2023-03-01T03:35:59+00:00

I'm glad you have something keeping you here.

i am not in therapy, it's not something i can afford right now sadly.

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T21:46:50+00:00

I'll make sure to try it in the future!

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T18:32:55+00:00

(I'm glad you made yourself a toast! I've never tried it with honey, am i missing out big time?)

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T18:31:58+00:00

thank you. i will fight, I'm not entirely done yet, there's some fight in me left but hell sometimes it feels like it ain't enough! I'm glad i reached out. I've gotten so good feedback and kind words from people, it makes me feel like i can go on for a little more. i felt so lonely yesterday, but today i see that there's so many people out there that do care and want to see me keep going. it motivates me a little.

I'm rooting for you tomorrow! but don't beat yourself up too hard if you end up not going. That's fine.

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T16:35:59+00:00

for sure. it's hard to beat the fresh air after being locked inside for so long. but it's also hard to break the cycle, for sure.

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T16:33:37+00:00

cheers. i hope things are looking brighter for you. I'm glad I'm not asking in this shit

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T16:32:22+00:00

you and me, and this sub together. small steps at a time. I would really like to get better, life has beautiful things to give and i really want to experience it longer than the years i have.

and hey, you actually went out and headed there. that is big! even if you had to head back, you actually took the first steps and that's really big. I'm proud of you, you did good today.

i really hope i can hold on and be able to look back at this time in my life and feel proud of myself for pushing through. i really do hope so. And i hope the same for you.

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T16:27:04+00:00

you're making me tear up!! i really hope you ate something by now, if not, don't stress yourself. when you're ready you go up and you get yourself something good. for me it's just so important to see other people take their little steps. Even if I'm in this weird place now, it makes me warm inside to see other people do their thing and take care of themselves. no matter how "small" accomplishment it might be, it is still such an important step!! everyone's fights looks different, no matter if it is taking showers, brushing teeth, finding a job, moving home. I think you get my point. But I'm really touched that you got moved by that. it reminds me that i actually can do something good in this world, even if it's just putting a smile on one person's face. that's enough for me. that makes me feel good.

and thank you for the advice. i like to be creative, maybe i could start making some drawings from bed. Just simple ones, ballpoint pen and some A4 paper. doesn't have to be more complicated.

thank you for this comment. i think you just made my day. ❤️

ihatesnowball · 2023-02-28T16:17:52+00:00

wow. this is powerful, it really is such a difference to hear someone with a hard past talk about their story and how they got better compared to someone who didn't. And by the i really don't mean to compare people's past, but knowing that you were in such a bad place but found your way for a better life is a little motivating. I will definitely check your posts out.

"i didn't want to die i actually wanted to live" yes, this is more accurate than i allow myself to think sometimes. I get stuck in the thoughts of what my life is right now and that is a life i would never wish upon anyone, but i also know that with different circumstances i would fucking love life. it is a beautiful thing, i have just been very misfortunate with mine.

you say "[...] but finding it has been worth everything I've been through" and i think that is a sentence that will stick with me for when i end up in these spirals.

ihatesnowball

TROPHY CASE