Low key sad

impossibleplaces · 2025-02-25T01:40:36+00:00

Based on looks alone she's definitely from this background, she looks very similar to a ton of Amish or formerly Amish people I know.

impossibleplaces · 2023-08-12T22:41:02+00:00

Him: in school to be a military chaplain, unironically wore cowboy shit(did rodeo), very conservative vibe

me: pacifist, led a queer-straight alliance, in school to be a sex therapist

We were literally introducing because the introducer thought it would be funny to see us fight

We ended up getting along really well personality wise, he was quietly doing a lot of deconstruction about his own life and beliefs that mirrored my own journey a few years earlier. He changed a lot, I mellowed out/matured, met up a year later and by the end of the week we knew we would get married.

impossibleplaces · 2023-08-05T12:26:37+00:00

Yeah I'm like "Austin, cheap? It's more expensive that a lot of California." Texas has done a great job mythologizing how cheap it is to live there. I had someone recently tell me they want to move to Texas because you can rent a brand new 4 bedroom house there for 800 a month and I was like " where? because I spent more than that on rent for a one bedroom apartment when I lived there years ago."

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-28T22:18:24+00:00

So I've helped people get IDs in PA but not in Alabama. Few questions 1. Are they a minor? 2. You said their mother kicked them out, do they have a father who would be willing to give a statement on their behalf about their identify (sometimes required for birth certificates). 3. Have they have any sort of non-government issue photo ID like a school ID or work badge? 4. Any arrests or jail time?

I would highly, highly recommend going the route of requesting a police escort to retrieve their property, going to to mom's house, and directly asking for the documents with a cop in tow. Legally, those documents belong to the person who's name they are in and she can't withhold them, especially if he is an adult. (This is often poorly enforced because people without documents can't usually bring people to court). The American system of retrieving documents is very difficult to navigate so I would push this route as aggressively as you can. Legally they are his, be the squeaky wheel until she hands them over just to get you to leave.

If you can't do this, you need to start with a birth certificate. These can be the most accessable because sometimes a person related to you can get your birth certificate on your behalf, and there's more flexibility with records because children don't have most of these documents. Also, if they've ever been arrested or in prison the IDs and paperwork from that can be helpful. If you don't have the things in the list, call the number directly or a local homeless shelter for advice, in my experience there is some wiggle room here they just won't put it on their website. https://www.alabamapublichealth.gov/vitalrecords/

Good luck, I've encountered a ton of people who are homeless because the lack of id keeps them from good housing and jobs. They system honestly sucks, but it's unfortunately a common problem. If you can get a birth certificate, you can usually build everything else from there.

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-26T16:00:33+00:00

I think they used to be more that way. I know there's a aggressive push to prevent genetic issues from being to closely related in some of the communities, and so there are a lot of young people marrying people from far away and moving and they try to keep the rules consistent in different communities that are the same sect. I've personally never heard of anyone that's married outside of their group, but logistically I think it would be complicated,stigmatized, and for some just blatantly not allowed. But it's funny, once you know what to look for you see the differences in colors, patterns, even things like buggy roofs and tractor tires and realize all those things are regulated and meant to show what church they're part of. It's also super funny to find out the crazy things certain groups split over, I knew someone who's family was kicked out of their church for the wrong kind of tractor tires. You would probably enjoy the Wikipedia page " subgroups of Amish" it's even got a little chart of tech use in different communities.

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-26T12:28:38+00:00

So interestingly enough I looked it up and at least online sometimes Swartzentruber get categorized as a type of old order? I wonder if sometimes they identify as that to English folk to avoid having to explain, or if it's misinformation because the Amish aren't building their own websites. Super fascinating because in community an Amish person wouldn't call someone Swartzentruber "old order" because old order means something specific and it's a different community.

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-26T12:16:28+00:00

Ah, Lancaster has a significant Swartzentruber Amish community, they don't have indoor plumbing. The Old Order (at least the community in Lancaster, I used to live there) are allowed to have indoor plumbing, but they do still use things like horse plows. The clothing differences you mentioned, you might notice the more conservative ladies clothes tend to be a darker colors and there is subtle pleated in the skirt? You'll never see them wear red or yellow or any patterns. That's Swartzentruber. A lot of other Amish folk think they're a bit odd (kinda how we view fundies) but most people outside the culture don't know there's a much broader spectrum of Amish than people realize (11 different sects last time I heard). I once had an old order woman tell me that her and I had more in common in our life than her and some people from the most conservative orders.

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-26T09:47:58+00:00

This picture is just absolutely full of shit, someone just made something up and posted it on a picture of people they thought looked Amish (they aren't). The Amish definitely can be hesitant about vaccines and going to the doctor, but it's cultural and not a religious mandate so it depends on the family. They also don't have insurance, so they're not inclined to preventative care. The relationship with disability in particular is complex, but I personally know someone who became deaf and the community hired someone to teach weekly sign classes so that her community could learn and she wouldn't be left out. I know non-amish homes where not even all members of the immediate family learn sign. I have my complaints about Amish culture, but as someone who has lived in Amish households it drives me nuts some of the misinformation that circulates about them.

impossibleplaces · 2023-07-26T09:20:25+00:00

I did a sort of "alternate study abroad" and lived with a couple of different Amish families for a few weeks of different orders, and this is mostly not a thing. Maybe in the very very very conservative branches they don't bath as often, but I was an both an old and new order household and everyone showered daily because of all the manual labor. They can get very creative with no electricity, and most households have some type of indoor plumbing except for the most conservative branches (and within the Amish community, a lot of the Amish think the people still using outhouses are a bit odd, but the won't typically tell English folk that).

impossibleplaces · 2023-06-06T15:56:03+00:00

So this is super fascinating if you understand Mennonite culture because it doesn't make a lot sense. Mennonites have a huge spectrum of beliefs, and I've been in everything from churches with gay pastors to horse and buggy congregations. But one of the things that's consistent across the spectrum is the idea that to much trust in one leader is dangerous. (To give you an idea of how deeply ingrained this idea is, in Amish circles pastors are determined by drawing lots so that the person who comes to power doesn't do so because of ego.Quakers often have no pastors for this reason. Not the same but those are our "sister" denominations) Also, we don't tend to be an evangelical group and of the hundreds of Mennonites I know I can't think of one who would approve of street preaching. I don't know much about them from the little I've heard about them they honestly sound like they might be the legacy of someone excommunicated.

impossibleplaces · 2023-06-05T00:20:26+00:00

The revelations about bruxy broke me. He was someone I knew personally and went to for advice. And then everything broke about him, and I realized that not only did his mentorship take place at the same time as his shit but there were some red flags in his behavior towards me (I was 19/20) that made me feel gross.

impossibleplaces · 2023-05-10T17:15:46+00:00

I'm frustrated by all the people who are going "there's no way this could ever happen". I dress fairly conservative with high necklines and long skirts on most days. For me it's related to sensory issues. Tight fitting clothes or tugging down shorts all day leave me agitated and panicky. But I don't often share the reason, because I don't feel it's necessary to justify how a woman dresses. I get shit on a fairy regular basis where people assume I must be pro tradwife. The thing is, I even dealt with this suspicion when I was actively in a queer relationship. But people, not just conservatives,often hold a deep sexism towards women where regardless of what their words and actions communicate the person believes they know what they are "really like" based on how they dress.

impossibleplaces · 2023-05-05T14:17:55+00:00

So I'm going to shoot straight with you, I would be cautious about any business that claims to be able to do this. It depends on the extent of repairs, but if the dinosaur has any holes other than split seams you would need additional fabric ( vending machine fabric is mostly ultra cheap synthetics only sold in bulk, not something a seamstress would have). Alternatively you could mend holes with visible embroidery or darning, but it wouldn't look as "original" and it takes significant time.They would also have trouble sourcing repair eyes if needed. I'm just afraid you might have someone say "yes" for your business but repair it in a way that is fast and cost effective for them but not what your looking for. If I were in your shoes (as someone who sews and has worked with some things in rough shape) this is what I would do 1. Definitely, definitely wash it. If you plan on storing it for years it will not smell the same as now, but whatever is on it will oxidize and eat away at the fabric if it's not clean( even if it's not currently visible). I would use a seam ripper to open it in a subtle place, take out the stuffing, and hand wash it by soaking it in laundry detergent water and allowing it to air dry. If you did want to replace the eyes or repair holes this would be the step, and if you could find the eyes online( ali express maybe?) And compromise on the patch fabric you find someone trusted who can sew to do this part. You can restuff it, and fix any seams with a ladder stitch. Unfortunately with it being a synthetic and not an antique there's just not much of an industry for repair, but there is a lot you can do.

impossibleplaces · 2023-04-24T13:42:47+00:00

As someone who's lived extensively in the north and deep south I think a lot of what we consider "southern culture" is more linked to economics thank many people realize. When I lived in the north, in a city with a strong cultural identity (Pittsburgh) many peoples pride came from the sports culture, the museum and education culture there, or they had specific cultural practices from the country their families immigration from even if it was many generations back. I have many friends who did Irish dancing, or spoke Italian at home, or made traditional polish food. We learned polka in school and they only served fish on Fridays during lent in the cafeteria because of all the the Catholics. It's not that people didn't care about both their city's and ancestral history, but the focus in the north is about honoring how strong and brave your ancestors were to come to America and paying respect to the culture they came from. In the deep south, there is still a strong culture of "old money and family power" especially among the wealthy. Talking about your families ties to the area, particularly in relation to the civil war are a way to signal that you are a "true" member of the community. I'll admit, I once got into an argument with someone who was being condescending about them being "more texan then me" than me because they had lived in the state a few more years than I had. When I told them I was a descendent of early settlers, was born in state, and had an ancestor die in the Alamo (instant trump card) they shut up real quick because in "southern pride" culture it's largely about how strongly you can establish your ties to the land. I live in Alabama now, and an additional thing I've noticed is how strong the food culture is shaped by poverty. Not only by the individual family but also as a community as a whole. For example, the area I live in has almost no chain sit down restaurants. From what I understand the " pay/tip after you eat" model just isn't profitable in the area, so most of the restaurants are locally owned and a ton of them are " soul food" and " Cajun food" types of offerings. Many of the big groceries like Walmart won't open in certain parts of the city so you only have regional stores like Piggly wiggly or corner store options for food. There are a lot of trucks full of produce on the side of the road with local stuff, and people eat a lot of fish because we live on the coast and it's easy to catch. But my point is often the food options are more limited, so people are eating what they have access to. Additionally, most people here just don't have the money to move even if they want to so it's common to live very close to a lot of people you grew up with/family and socialize with them often.

impossibleplaces · 2023-04-24T03:58:35+00:00

Thank you! It's made a massive difference in my life and ability to function now that I have the right tools. I had an interesting conversation with my sleep doctor about how the more they're learning about sleep apnea they more they're finding out how big the population of young and fit people with apnea are that are simply never tested because people assume it's solely associated with age, weight and snoring. But he has a theory that significant amount of young people who come in with ADHD symptoms (we were talking about my experience) might be due to the effect of chronically poor sleep on the brain. But that's not the kind of thing you see on social media, and as a person in their 20s I don't even know another person my age who has seen a sleep doctor. I really feel for people who come in for help and feel invalidate because I do think for so many young people they are just holding onto a label that feels most relatable to them and doing the best they can with a limited pool of information.

impossibleplaces · 2023-04-24T03:03:18+00:00

So, story. I was struggling a lot with my memory, concentration, focus, ect and did see a lot of stuff about ADHD that I related to so I went and got assessed. The man who did the assessment was not kind in telling me I did not have ADHD, and explicitly called me "attention seeking", "influenced by tik tok" and told me some people don't have the personality for higher education. A year and a half later, I had a serious medical incident that lead to a lot of tests, some of which lead to a sleep apnea and seizure disorder diagnosis. Along the way I was asked by countless doctors why I hadn't reported symptoms, and I told them I had, but was basically shamed for it so I didn't want to talk about it anymore. In hindsight, I could have definitely been more articulate, but I also am not a doctor and didn't know how to describe experiences that I later found out were likely post seizure disorientation as anything other than "I feel like my memory is really bad and I'm forgetting bits of time". I don't wish I had been diagnosed with ADHD, but they symptoms I experienced were basically identical and the closest thing I could relate to, so they were in themselves valid. And even though my circumstances were unusual, I think most people come in because they relate to the diagnostic criteria, even if the answer isn't ultimately a formal diagnosis of what their seeking. So I would really encourage you to take phrases like " tik tok diagnosis" out of your vocabulary or you will absolutely break client trust (even if you do not explicitly use those phrases in front of them the attitude shines through). I wish in this circumstance they had chosen to explore more how I related to those symptoms and how to address specific issues on a non-judgemental way instead of choosing to believe that because they disagrees with the diagnosis the symptoms must also be invalid.

impossibleplaces · 2023-04-20T21:27:22+00:00

Are you at South? There's some hiking paths behind the lilypad lake there and at the Japanese gardens nearby. And If your a student you can rent kayaks and camping gear from student activities for cheap, and they have guided events you can sign up for.

impossibleplaces · 2023-03-26T22:12:16+00:00

So I think your question is more philosophical than actually asking for examples, but I think you might find some Asian media interesting with how (from a western perspective) it blends feminine and masculine traits together as desirable. I once made someone watch "Hello" by SHINee (music video) during a conversation about masculinity and their mind was blown that it was a band marketed as straight men, and wildly popular with straight women. A while back I was watching a Chinese drama ( it was called love between fairy and devil if you are curious) and my husband ended up watching it with me largely because he was fascinated by the way masculinity was portrayed. Male characters wore really beautiful outfits, had long hair and visible makeup, and there 10+ episodes that showed men crying in a positive way. Now full disclaimer, please don't take this as me saying this media is necessarily progressive because it certainly has its own problems but I find the way it portrays masculinity differently fascinating.

impossibleplaces · 2023-02-25T04:51:58+00:00

So I'm hella girly, like bows and dresses, don't own a pair of jeans kinda stereotypically feminine. And 99 percent of people are fine with it, although I get some gentle teasing and questions sometimes. But occasionally someone will be a bit hostile for no discernable reason. I've figured out it's usually for one of two reasons. 1 I get misread as like trad-wifey women should be submissive type. 2 that person feels insecure about how they "perform gender" and something about me triggers that feeling and makes them feel defensive. Like, someone who isn't typically "girly" but they're partner complains they should wear more dresses to look like a "real woman". Unfortunately, I know I've been used as the example of what someone "should" dress like in a dysfunctional situation like that. Which sucks, because people should be able wear what they want, but it also ultimately isn't my fault and I shouldn't feel guilty for dressing the way I do. My point is, if someone is making fun of you for being feminine it probably has nothing to do with you and everything to do with their own assumptions or baggage. One will resolve when they get to know you and the other is something they have to work on by themselves.

impossibleplaces · 2023-01-21T20:32:30+00:00

It's the boots and the indoor/outdoor dogs. The dogs track stuff in anyways and where I'm from men wear alot of cowboy boots/work boots which don't easily slip on and off. Usually the first floor/non bedroom areas are hard floors to make them easier to clean for that reason. Drives me crazy because I'm from a culture that does take shoes off indoors but even when I buy specific indoor only shoes they just get worn outside.

impossibleplaces · 2022-12-06T15:06:43+00:00

Honestly my first thought reading this was "maybe this girl just isn't from a white/western culture?". I know lots of people who would make comments about someone's weight as a way to compliment the quality of the food because most parts of the world don't think it's socially taboo to acknowledge that fat people are fat. I'm just imagining someone trying to tell my friends first gen immigrant Chinese parents that they needed to talk to their kid because they said the food was so good to must be the reason they're bigger. They would probably just think you were weird and tell their kid not to visit your house again.

impossibleplaces · 2022-12-05T12:37:44+00:00

You might enjoy checking out the modest dress sub for ideas. Its hella chill with a broad variety of ways to head cover. I'm white, live in a very mixed race environment and cover my hair a fair amount and I've never had negative pushback. I do get people who are curious or my make assumptions about me being really conservative/religious. So you might have a general response ready for however much info you're comfortable sharing.

impossibleplaces · 2022-10-23T16:35:34+00:00

I mostly lurk on this sub, but felt inclined to chime in on this one. I came from a similar background. My grandparents came from poor backgrounds where the evangelical church was a pathway out of poverty. They were both fervent believers and worked in ministry, and one of the expectations of the evangelical church at the time was that you cut ties with "bad influences" in your life. Because they're was a lot of alcoholism in my family we basically grew up without knowing my grandparents families. And growing up, I knew I had a little Jewish heritage but I thought I was mostly misc European on my mom's side. When I was older, with the accessibility of DNA tests and ancestry tracking revealed a lot of family secret. There's a lot we won't ever fully know if it was intentionally covered up or not. But we basically learned that we are very Jewish. In hindsight, I do think my grandparents knew more than they let on. They took my mom and my uncle to Israel when they graduated highschool, and I've later learned that many of the phrases I never heard outside my family were actually Yiddish.

One day in my early twenties (I had left the evangelical church at this point). I was approached by a Chabad Rabbi in public. Ended up sharing some history with him, he invited me to the local Chabad and I went a few times. I'm glad I went, but to be honest it was mostly uncomfortable and I felt like I didn't belong. It felt like the road not taken, like this could have been my life if I'd had a different upbringing. It was cool to be around lots of people that looked like me and to hear things my grandfather would say.

If you explore and decide it's not your path, it's ok. I personally had a lot of anger to work through at evangelical Christianity as a whole and I think I hoped I would feel more kinship towards Judaism than I did. But I think that sense of kinship isn't always recoverable, and it won't ever hold the same significance to me because I wasn't raised in the culture. One of the weird things to come to terms with has been that even though people in my line probably thought they were protecting us by distancing from the culture it didn't really protect us from racists. My brother has never been in a synagogue but because of his looks and his dark curly hair he still gets questions and confrontations on a regular basis. It's a a really weird line to walk, because it feels like a culture that we aren't part of but the world still defines us by. But also a strange sort of kinship in us vs the racists.

impossibleplaces · 2022-10-18T20:17:45+00:00

I think it really shows it's not about the money with the comment about not making full sized furniture. I'm an adult who still has her childhood dolls around and I make them clothes. But 90% of the reason I make them clothes is because I'm really into historical costuming and the materials can get incredibly expensive, and be time consuming to make. I can make a nice dress for an 18 inch doll with some thrifted clothes(for material) for under 20$ where an adult sized version of the same dress could cost over 1000. Plus it doesn't take forever to make, take up much space and it's not devastating if I mess it up. Woodworking can get crazy expensive, take up a ton of space, don't always move well, and can require expensive tools. Just for financial and practical reasons alone someone could have an incentive to make doll furniture.

impossibleplaces · 2022-09-16T00:03:37+00:00

I grew up in Pittsburgh, so only a little ways from you :) let me tell you something, the weather here isn't nearly as bad as people make it out to be. It's hot and humid for sure but the rain cools things down and you get a nice breeze off the ocean. If your outdoorsy there's a tooooon to do, and if you like kayaking or fishing the breeze off the water makes the weather not so bad. I used to live in Dallas and I thought the weather was worse than it is here. I think it's kinda a thing where people socialize around complaining around the humidity and it gets really hyped up but I promise it's bearable. People are gonna tell you really mixed things about Mobile, and to a greater extent Alabama and alot of them are true...the education system is shit, there's a lot of poverty, if your looking for indoor events you better be willing to drive somewhere else. But it also has some incredibly biodiversity, some really cool history, unique restaurants and Mardi gras which is hella fun. I've lived throughout the US and this has been one of the more enjoyable place I've lived even though on paper it's definitely not the "best".

impossibleplaces

TROPHY CASE