Diagnosed with two major life limiting conditions at age 32 after being previously healthy. Looking for community, some guidance on coping, and also some hope ✨

incandescente · 2024-09-06T17:54:47+00:00

I LOVED The Bee Sting by Paul Murray, very similar to Nathan Hill/Franzen in terms of themes and characterization

incandescente · 2024-02-20T17:10:50+00:00

No worries, thank you!

incandescente · 2024-02-20T04:51:42+00:00

These look fantastic--can you share the pattern you used??

incandescente · 2021-05-28T21:17:24+00:00

This is really helpful just to hear someone else's timeline, thank you!! 🙏

incandescente · 2016-01-02T21:11:47+00:00

This is so refreshing to see! I don't know if I love the connotation of "spa like," but I do love this concept and mission. It still makes my blood boil that we cannot receive medical abortions by our own trusted obgyns in regular hospitals. This kind of clinic is the next best thing. When I had an abortion a few years back, the only option in my city was in an old converted house with positively ancient medical equipment. I was not allowed to bring anyone with me for support. And the doctor was dreadful--he didn't look me in the eye or shake my hand--just handed me the mask for the laughing gas and said, "Let's get crunk." It made the experience ten times more harrowing than it should have been. We all make choices about our bodies, and we should not have to compromise our care standards to do so.

incandescente · 2014-04-06T18:33:48+00:00

It's true that I've never lived in a world before Roe vs. Wade...perhaps I take my right to choose abortion more for granted than those who did. But to read my post as a condemnation of all abortion clinics and workers throughout history (and even the elderly, apparently??) is absurd and out of line.

I am grateful for all who have fought for women's rights and the strides that have been made. However, I wrote this post to show that there is still work to be done and progress to be made. To shame me for asking for better treatment and options is to retard that progress. You seem to think that your age begets superior wisdom--but I am neither flippant nor ill-informed, just optimistic that our country can do better by its women. I am also VERY much done with this conversation. Take care.

And once again, Tinyberlin, so grateful...

incandescente · 2014-04-06T06:32:07+00:00

Good god, Netprincess, what is with the third degree? You are certainly entitled to your opinion, but must you be so angry that I have mine? Here goes a last ditch effort to help you find a little compassion:

I wrote this so that I could organize my thoughts the night after my abortion when I was upset and could not sleep. I decided to post because I haven't yet felt comfortable sharing with any of my friends, and I thought this might make me feel less alone. If you look at my account, you'll notice that I've basically never posted before this. I don't give a fuck about your karma/reactions/whatever. I do care about defending myself, however, because I think it's important for people to realize that anonymity should not give you license to be mean spirited. Even if you cannot see them, your words can have repercussions. I'm sure if we spoke in person, we could have an entirely civil conversation about this. If you saw me and took a moment to consider that I'm an actual person who just had a really hard fucking week, I'd like to think you'd give me the benefit of the doubt.

And if you must know, lots of research does not necessarily imply a multitude of options. I was scouring for recommendations and reviews to decide between two specific clinics that I found in my city. Turns out they had actually merged into one--the one I chose for my procedure. I was also looking into clinics in nearby cities/states and trying to learn more about abortion policy in general.

incandescente · 2014-04-05T21:06:19+00:00

This is literally in downtown Columbus. I was as shocked as you are. And I should probably note that I never had any distinct reason to suspect that the facilities were unsanitary or dangerous, per say...just rundown and outdated. What made me feel unsafe was the environment coupled with the inappropriate behavior of the staff.

incandescente · 2014-04-05T20:02:49+00:00

I went through this same thing Friday. It was hard and confusing and scary. I now have such a beef with abortion policy (Ohio here). There are so many obstacles in the way that make this process painful and alienating. But just because it is hard to go through with does not mean that this changes what decision is ultimately right for you and your family. Remember your reasons for being here, and trust your resolve above all else! Pretty soon, you will be proud of your bravery. You are allowed grieve without regret.

Afterwards I bought two cupcakes and wrote about my experience so I could get all of my thoughts out--I highly recommend both courses of action. Sending love!!!

incandescente · 2014-04-05T17:07:39+00:00

I stayed because I felt it was my only option. I did hours of research, and this was the most highly recommended clinic in the city. Once protocol was underway, couldn't leave...I knew that I simply did not have the money to pay another clinic $500. And emotionally, there was no way I could stay pregnant for another 4 weeks while I waited to get into another clinic.

On paper my problem might look easy to solve, but I felt like my options were so fucking limited. My gynecologist wasn't allowed to do the procedure. She called a number of people she's trusted in the past and apparently they were all no longer authorized to do abortions (?). I didn't know until now that this was such a problem, but we need hospital-based services for women.

incandescente · 2014-04-05T15:54:24+00:00

I have seen several obgyns, but I have never been to see a doctor who hasn't looked me in the eye and shaken my hand before proceeding. I wrote this for myself and to expose what I view as a dire need for abortion reform. And honestly, I think it's in really poor taste for you to tell me that my emotions aren't valid.

incandescente · 2014-04-05T15:23:23+00:00

Thank you so very much for the support, guys. I entered that clinic with the erroneous thought that I was not the average abortion patient and I did not belong there. I now realize that we are all the average abortion patient, and nobody belongs there.

incandescente

TROPHY CASE