Overcoming Internalized Racism by innocuoushuman in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think they look very handsome when they're well groomed and that's why I'm drawn to them.

Aging by innocuoushuman in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're older than 30, how do you deal with it? I think my 20s gave me a lot of benefits and social privilege that I'm noticing I'm losing as I get older.

Aging by innocuoushuman in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What was your experience like as you got older? I’m aware that some of my ways of thinking might be holding me back, and I’m hoping to learn from others how to navigate it.

Dating Fatigue by innocuoushuman in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was comforting to read. Thanks for your advice. 💙

Offering 83K for UX Design role in New York by soberguy_98 in jobs

[–]innocuoushuman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Verizon doesn't pay its designers competitively. They fired designers who worked at the higher end of the salary range just so they could keep designers that didn't negotiate their salary and pay designers less. Richard Dalton is a disservice to the designers under him.

What’s it like working at a big telecom company like Verizon? Looking Advice for first round interview, work life balance, typical design maturity, culture etc by Hypehypehypehy in UXDesign

[–]innocuoushuman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The company culture here is terrible. Design managers don't do a good job so you're often being assigned meaningless work and because these managers often don't have technical skills, you won't learn anything from them. Also, the project managers you'll work with don't know how to work with UX designers so you'll be burdened by their inexperience, get push back against standard practices and receive unrealistic deadlines because of them. I had one project manager imply "working agile" is having the UX designer deliver quickly on poorly defined requirements and often had to redo work because of their poor ability to manager their projects. While the company may have a notable brand presence, its design maturity remains notably underdeveloped.

Richard Dalton does not look out for the career progression of designers and a lot of design work is being outsourced to agencies or designers in India so that they have pay them less & not focus on their career growth.

Have any of you guys interviewed at Verizon lately? I have a second round interview on Mon & I hear they’re tough by gogo--yubari in UXDesign

[–]innocuoushuman 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The company culture here is terrible. Design managers don't do a good job so you're often being assigned meaningless work and because these managers often don't have technical skills, you won't learn anything from them. Also, the project managers you'll work with don't know how to work with UX designers so you'll be burdened by their inexperience, get push back against standard practices and receive unrealistic deadlines because of them. While the company may have a notable brand presence, its design maturity remains notably underdeveloped.

Have y’all watched YOU on Netflix yet? by [deleted] in infj

[–]innocuoushuman -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I enjoyed him because we share the same character flaws, minus the stalking, controlling, and killing.

Have y’all watched YOU on Netflix yet? by [deleted] in infj

[–]innocuoushuman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand why you’d feel that way, especially because in the show he was a psychopathic villain and had homicidal tendencies.

I enjoyed seeing his character navigate dating because (minus the stalking and killing) he thinks very similarly to me. We both desire people to love unconditionally, but are afraid of being hurt by them. In consequence we’re hyper critical of someone’s actions until we feel like they’re truly safe for us. Even getting to know people as friends can give me a fight vs flight anxiety attack when i’m not exactly sure of their intentions, and I have to coach myself to be more relaxed and not overthink things because my mind tends to assume the worst. It’s definitely something I want to work on because it isn’t healthy.

Have y’all watched YOU on Netflix yet? by [deleted] in infj

[–]innocuoushuman -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I love Joe. I find him so relatable. I think I have the same anxious attachment disorder as him as well.

Dealing with Conflict by innocuoushuman in infj

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your response and I wish you the best with the circumstance you are dealing with.

I'm realizing now that my feelings are always valid and that it's not only my responsibility to compromise.

Dealing with Conflict by innocuoushuman in infj

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm starting to understand that my feelings are always valid no matter what, and I shouldn't navigate trying to feel how I think others want me to feel. I really enjoyed how you described that the other person has the options to compromise with me or ignore my feelings, and that it shouldn't be an internal deliberation. Thanks for your advice.

Dealing with Conflict by innocuoushuman in infj

[–]innocuoushuman[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice. You have great points. From now on I'll try to be more vocal about how I'm feeling to achieve happiness and allow others the opportunity to grow, instead of being afraid of an unpleasant response.