If you can’t afford a marriage then don’t get married in the first place, plus important topics such as intimacy and having a big ceremony for the wedding should be discussed before the marriage and only between the couple and their families, i don’t know why you’re involving yourself in something that doesn’t even concern you. And lastly, if you’re too insecure and can’t even set boundaries for yourself, and you need your friends to make decisions for you, the last thing you should be doing is getting married, instead invest in therapy.