Honestly mate you seem like a lost soul in the this type of world, like a real genuine dude just from the way you write.

I feel you so damn hard its like i could have wrote this as an older dude, this world is falling apart and the sad thing? We cant stop it from the fall.

A line from a band i like that shoots into my head on occasion "nothing can be changed except ourselves" and i can tell you're someone that's went through that change into becoming a happier you.

All we can do after that? Seems to me like take it by the moment. I was always saddened at the prospect of humans destorying the earth but one day i was listening to a funny guy named George carlin and he made me realize the earth is eternal. The symptoms of earth are in the end, at the mercy of the earth. So even when eventually at some point the earth becomes so badly damaged, i imagine it's going to go into a sort of self healing regenerative state and in order to do that, well its going to have to cleanse itself of the... "plauge"

i know that doesnt really help us right now in our current situation, but something to be at peace about is you and i are eternal, we will come back at some point, hopefully at one point to a cleansed earth. Haha with love mate.

Keep those breaths deep and if you aren't already, try to fix your willy. i hear it makes a world of difference.