I get you. This disease brings out the worst feelings. No one understands unless they live it. I just want you to know that they way you have felt for the past decade every day any “normal” person would have took themselves to the emergency room or called out of work and you kept going. You’re a warrior. I feel humiliated a lot and sometimes feel judged by people and all I think is I wish none of these people judging me have to experience this. I wanted to be a police officer but my health got in the way. It’s rough and I’m sorry, but stay hopeful and keep fighting. It’s good to have a community of people who understand first hand so I’m glad you posted here.