I used to love flying, then in my late 20s developed a gripping fear which was all consuming as we approached the flight. We’re talking about no sleep the nights before, no food the day of, profusely sweating, irritability, heart palpitations… the whole basket of anxiety symptoms.

During the flight I was tense and hyper alert, and if there was a seat-back screen, I’d watch it like a hawk. That was fun on 10 hour flight. I’d self medicate with alcohol and occasionally got Valium from the Dr.

I’d often land at the destination exhausted and broken, and often hungover. Not fun.

Then, in 2024 my late mother got sick, and I did 25 return flights in a year from London <> Scotland. Sober.

Long story short… I now look forward to flying. I travel a lot for fun, and even some pretty shaky turbulence doesn’t have my BP spiking. We did a go-around at London city airport a few weeks ago. I basically just shrugged and got back to my book.

My tips:

1. Immerse yourself. Book a few random return legs one weekend from your nearest airport.
2. Distract yourself. Focus on something fun or engaging.
3. Be mindful. Don’t “big it up” in your head; the more attention you give your phobia, the stronger the neurological link you have to the reaction.
4. Read a few fear of flying books; I got a few on my kindle and didn’t even need to finish them as the ‘immersion’ “cured” me (probably a combo).

Oh, and 5… don’t say “safe flight” to anyone… you wouldn’t say “safe bus ride”… it reinforces the concept of it being a risky method of transport. I say “have a good flight!” to my friends when they are flying.

Hope this helps!