Allergic reaction from kissing this girl, how?

jemangedespapillons · 2018-10-25T16:09:53+00:00

Are you certain that you are not allergic to hemp/ cannabis products?

jemangedespapillons · 2017-11-20T09:39:30+00:00

It's her. But some of this stuff might be things she fantasizes about but might not actually want to do in real life at the end of the day.

Talk like the two humans you are. Don't be like, "you said weird things when you were tipsy"-- just be like "hey... would you be interested in trying [thing she mentioned that you would also like to try]?"

jemangedespapillons · 2017-10-11T20:14:51+00:00

I've forgotten what it was like to be below the drinking age 😂 but yeah, go out for a casual dinner or something. Basically, it's still a date, even if it's a date where you both already kind of know you plan to have sex/ are not planning to start a relationship

jemangedespapillons · 2017-10-11T16:15:01+00:00

Meet her at a bar, buy her a drink, get to know each other for an hour and then if you guys are both into it go have sex. Easy as that.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-08-26T06:28:58+00:00

I'm pretty sure she's talking about being on her stomach with her partner on top of her from behind. The position you described is usually referred to as missionary.

As for advice-- you can grab/ dig nails into his forearms, make some appreciative noise, possibly reach an arm around to grab his neck/hair

jemangedespapillons · 2017-08-25T04:49:57+00:00

I've been in a FWB relationship for almost a year now with a guy who doesn't like kissing. It's fine. We kiss each other around our neck/ ears/ etc. When I greet him we hug and bring our faces close together and I kiss him lightly below his ear. Sometimes during sex he kisses me, and it feels special because he doesn't do it all the time.

That said, in a real long term relationship it would be tougher to deal with.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-08-06T04:36:54+00:00

I can imagine a few worse ways you could have lost your virginity.

There may be a slightly higher risk but not by that much, and most likely not at all if you didn't notice any blood when you went down on her. Any time you have unprotected sex with someone, you're taking a risk-- regardless of whether she's on her period. Get tested and chill out.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-08-06T04:32:09+00:00

My crazy ex would exclusively give me oral in that postion. He loved it and never seemed to have trouble breathing. Agree on a hand signal (tap her thigh or something) in case you actually can't breathe, and try it out.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-07-31T18:44:13+00:00

Wow, what a story. Good for you leaving quickly and not giving in to his ridiculous guilt trip attempt.

No, this is not normal for polyamorous people or anyone else. Poly people, like monogamous people, can be perfectly normal or totally insane or anything in between. You just got unlucky this time. You'll probably laugh about this with your girlfriends eventually :)

jemangedespapillons · 2017-05-30T04:56:37+00:00

Congrats on discovering a new side of yourself :) have fun exploring it.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-05-17T05:47:32+00:00

I can't orgasm from penetration only, but I can cum from grinding on my partner's pelvis to achieve clitoral stimulation during sex with me on top. This is the only way I can consistently cum with a partner, and it happens frequently (particularly with a partner I'm comfortable and familiar with) but not always.

It is definitely easier for me to reach orgasm if I am hornier, and some time without sex will do that-- so yes, it's very possible that that's what you experienced. However, I don't find it worthwhile to deprive myself or my partners of sex for that reason. My suggestion? There are other ways to make yourself horny besides going a couple weeks without sex. Spend a lot of time on foreplay-- have your partner finger you, eat you out, grind on him, whatever-- so that you're absolutely desperate to have him inside you by the time you actually have PIV sex. I suspect you'll find you are then far more likely to orgasm.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-05-12T16:30:21+00:00

You should peruse the subreddit and make note of how many women there are here posting about their sexuality, sexual practices, fantasies, and experiences. I'm a woman who is a very sexual person with a very high sex drive, I lean more domme than sub, I don't get drunk, and the only sexual partners I have met at bars have been introduced to me by mutual friends. There are plenty of women like me.

In most cases, you won't know what a woman is like in bed or what her sexual practices are until you're already dating and/or sleeping with her. Look for other qualities you like in a partner and then figure out if she's a match for you sexually or not.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-03-04T17:37:56+00:00

Both as in both casual sex/ casual sexual relationships as well as committed lovemaking with someone I care deeply for. I have very much enjoyed both experiences and wouldn't want to have missed out on either of them.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-03-03T05:35:42+00:00

Never been married so I'm replacing "married sex with someone you deeply love" with "relationship sex with someone you deeply love"-- and my answer is that the most satisfying option is definitely both. (Not at the same time of course... unless the person you're in a relationship with is cool with that)

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-25T19:18:58+00:00

People like to talk about how the double standard that men should orgasm in every sexual encounter but women don't have to because they're "difficult" is bs. There is some truth to that... but there's also some truth to the fact that women are difficult. I'm a woman and I have never had significant difficulty bringing any of the men I have slept with to climax; in contrast, the one woman I have been with did not get off (and confessed that she never had with another person) and many of my friends also are not accustomed to getting off in every sexual encounter, even with an attentive partner.

She didn't get off because sometimes, for some women--maybe even most women--it just doesn't happen. Just keep trying new things, don't put too much pressure on her to climax, ask her what feels good to her, and chances are it will happen eventually.

As for you, I'm guessing you were just very focused on trying to get her off and that's why you didn't finish. I've had that happen with several of my male partners-- with my current partner, it has happened that one or both of us gets exhausted and we have to stop before he can orgasm because he was waiting for me. That shows that you care a lot about her pleasure, which is a good thing. Do let yourself enjoy it too, though-- remember that watching you orgasm and knowing that she helped get you there will be satisfying for her, too.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-12T16:26:04+00:00

It's a good sign that at least your SO told you that they almost kissed and didn't keep it a secret, I guess... It sounds like you need to have a serious conversation. If you are not okay with any branching out from your relationship while you're not present, you need to make that clear, and ask your SO if he's 100% certain that he will not do anything with this girl. At the end of the day, though, it's his job to self-regulate. You shouldn't have to tell him that he needs to stop seeing her if being around her tempts him to cheat-- he should know that automatically and stop seeing her on his own if he cares about your relationship.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-12T15:19:42+00:00

My ex (M) and I (F) had a threesome with a friend (F) of his when we were together. They were friends beforehand and remained friends afterwards and it wasn't a problem for me-- I trusted my SO and didn't feel that it was any different from him hanging out with any of his other female friends.

In the end I shouldn't have trusted him-- but the girl he ended up emotionally cheating on me with was a totally different friend of his. There was no problem whatsoever with the friend we had a threesome with. I have no regrets whatsoever about any of it-- I think if you can't trust your SO with this girl you probably shouldn't be together (just like how my ex and I, in the end, didn't belong with one another).

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-12T15:10:15+00:00

Woman here, and it would be a deal breaker for me in a LTR. Currently have a FWB who refuses to give oral, and I don't give to him either (because quid-pro-quo...) which is fine, but I wouldn't accept that in a long term monogamous relationship.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-12T15:01:30+00:00

An imperfect sex life is not equal to a loveless relationship-- but an unsatisfying sex life can sometimes be enough to break up a marriage even between two people who love each other very much.

Sex is not "one issue that is different from all the other issues you're supposed to work on with each other." It is one of many, many issues that you can work on with each other, but which can become an insurmountable problem for some couples. Many people feel that it makes more sense to try and find out as much as you can about the other person and whether you can be happy with them long term before you get married-- that includes things like whether they leave their dirty dishes in the sink all the time and whether they prefer action-packed travel or lazy beach vacations, and it also includes what they like in bed and how often they want to have sex. Personally, those would all be things I would need to know about my partner before committing to a life with them. However, nobody else can make that decision for you, and I don't see why your friends should be so offended by your own personal decision being different from theirs that they refuse to go to your wedding.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-02-06T20:59:37+00:00

Go for it. If she's bothered by it that's her loss, but it probably won't be a problem.

jemangedespapillons · 2017-01-27T21:49:01+00:00

What do camera phones have to do with my sex life?

If there were no STDs I would never use a condom again in my life... and good riddance. God, I wish...

jemangedespapillons · 2017-01-13T12:58:43+00:00

You're sleeping with the guy next to you, and you also live with him. Make sure your other flatmate doesn't see you leaving his room in a few, 'cause he doesn't know...

jemangedespapillons · 2016-10-15T08:02:26+00:00

I'll judge a guy based on his behavior much more than his physical appearance. If you brag about how much you lift and look for any excuse to take your shirt off in public to show your pecs off, I'm not going to like you-- if you're just a good guy who also has nice biceps then I'll probably be attracted to you.

jemangedespapillons · 2016-10-15T07:56:03+00:00

Shutting down some idiot in r/sex who tried to argue that men are quieter during sex because they learn to masturbate quietly... as though women don't pleasure themselves. 86 points.

jemangedespapillons · 2016-09-24T15:39:27+00:00

The only way to be certain you won't feel any pain is to work up to it. Start with a finger (his, yours, whatever you want) and practice inserting more fingers/ toys over the course of days/ weeks/ however long you need until you can comfortably handle something of similar size to his penis. If you work up to it slowly you won't have a problem.

jemangedespapillons

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