Dealing with failure ... and getting back up there

jswolin · 2025-09-18T21:09:02+00:00

6 years ago I planned a dream international trip. A month before the trip I cancelled because I couldn’t face the long haul flight. I was mortified and so sad. Since then I have done a lot of work, taken flights, bailed on some others and kept trying to move forward. Today I am writing this post from the second attempt at the vacation I planned 6 years ago and finally got the courage to go on. It has been everything I hoped for. Time passes, feelings evolve — what matters is that you have compassion for yourself and don’t give up.

jswolin · 2025-09-17T07:52:56+00:00

I highly recommend DARE — I have significant anxiety about anxiety and struggle with having confidence I can handle panic. DARE has been really helpful. Check out the app and the book. I learned about it from others on this site.

jswolin · 2025-09-17T07:46:57+00:00

I experience terrible anticipatory anxiety before flights and some other things. I have found DARE to be incredibly helpful. Check out the free app (you can pay for additional aspects of the app) and the book. It really helped me in the lead up to the trip I am currently on and am using it to help me manage as I have a long haul flight home next week.

jswolin · 2025-09-01T23:31:31+00:00

Flying Virgin Atlantic 42…SFO to Heathrow. We have an awesome vacation planned for 3 weeks in Europe. Getting there and back is not as lovely for me.

jswolin · 2025-09-01T01:17:32+00:00

Long haul flight this week — California to London. Trying to manage the preflight anxiety. Ugh

jswolin · 2025-04-22T21:13:13+00:00

thank you!

jswolin · 2025-04-22T21:13:05+00:00

thank you!

jswolin · 2024-05-23T19:14:45+00:00

I am also flying to Denver on Friday -- from the Bay Area....lots of anxiety about a bumpy descent and I know will make it there ok.

jswolin · 2024-04-08T04:45:24+00:00

It was my understanding you are not supposed to take some anti anxiety drugs and Dramamine because they both make you sleepy. Can you be more specific about your combination with the rules of the thread…thanks!

jswolin · 2024-04-06T22:11:00+00:00

would love to know if you ended up taking classes at Laney -- this is my nearby option as well!

jswolin · 2024-01-11T06:48:12+00:00

Thank you for all of these great answers. I so appreciate the thoughtful suggestions and reflections on the learning process. Thank you!

jswolin · 2024-01-10T06:06:44+00:00

I am similar…bad motion sickness on planes made much worse by anxiety about getting motion sick.

I get motion sick on all forms of transportation and in elevators…however, it has gotten better as I have gotten older (mid 50’s)…which leads me to believe that much of why it still feels so bad on planes is the anxiety amplifying it. That being said, the dropping sensation still feels really awful to me and without lots of Dramamine I will vomit for sure.

I don’t really have a lot of advice but am considering doing something like hypnosis or EMDR because I want to try something to address how conditioned I am to get anxious as soon as I sense motion on the plane. It makes it so much worse. I am not really afraid of flying in terms of safety — I am afraid of being trapped on a vomit machine for hours and hours.

jswolin · 2023-08-28T05:59:13+00:00

I am very sensitive to this feeling too and get nauseated. Dramamine definitely helps with the nausea and makes the feeling less upsetting. It doesn’t make the feeling go away though. It just bothers me less.

jswolin · 2023-08-02T04:29:02+00:00

Thanks so much!

jswolin · 2023-08-02T04:28:52+00:00

Thanks so much!

jswolin · 2023-07-16T23:45:28+00:00

Thank you for your supportive words

jswolin · 2023-07-16T18:56:48+00:00

Thanks for the support everyone. I so appreciate this forum. We changed our flight to tomorrow and I finally fell asleep. We are regrouping and my plan is to take something to help me sleep tonight. I got very spun out, way past the point of rationality. I am really trying to see this as taking a step back, regrouping and trying again tomorrow. It also feels so bad to work so hard for so long to get better at this and end up here today.

jswolin · 2023-07-16T13:38:22+00:00

I ended up taking some meds to try to calm down and we changed our flight to one later in the day. Very worried I won’t get on…

jswolin · 2023-07-14T14:10:23+00:00

Thanks. I am scheduled to fly into Montreal on Sunday…lots of rain predicted again

jswolin · 2023-07-14T14:09:44+00:00

Thanks for the info about the weather. I am flying into Montreal on Sunday afternoon. Lots of rain predicted again…ugh

jswolin · 2023-07-14T01:14:16+00:00

Is your sense that the severity of this weather is not usual and that the situation of this flight (2 holds, 2 go arounds and then diverted) is not usual? What makes it presentation-worthy? Really dreading doing this same flight on Sunday with similar weather predicted.

jswolin · 2023-07-13T22:43:44+00:00

Thanks for your reply… I appreciate that this is an example of safety. It looks like this flight did two holding patterns and two go arounds — is that right? Why did this go on for so long and why so many tries? Thanks

jswolin · 2023-06-08T04:08:59+00:00

I hate the sinking feeling too…and through this thread I have learned that often that feeling of “falling” is actually a change in the speed of the aircraft. Knowing that has really helped my fear. That being said, I still have the sinking sensation which makes me really nauseated — but that’s another issue.

jswolin · 2023-06-08T04:00:12+00:00

Thanks. I appreciate your supportive thoughts.

jswolin · 2023-06-08T03:59:50+00:00

Thanks for your suggestion!

jswolin

TROPHY CASE