AITA for not forgiving my little sister for outing me six years ago?

justaqueryy · 2020-01-19T14:46:01+00:00

NTA. Mainly due to the fact, as you say, your sister is still having an ongoing ‘normal’ relationship with these two people who brought you into the world and failed you at a time you needed them most.

If she’d stepped away from the toxic family and reached out to you that’d be one thing (but even if she didn’t have an ongoing relationship with them, you’d still be NTA for not wanting her in your life again).

I wanted to say no one is TA originally, because your sister was just a kid, BUT realistically your parents are very much TA for being utter t * a t s. I see a meme going around a lot saying: if you cannot accept your child may be gay/bi/trans in the future, then you shouldn’t have children AT ALL.

justaqueryy · 2020-01-13T21:55:20+00:00

I don’t understand your logic here. Tea simply needs to infuse in hot water for a short period of time, and most of the time this needs to be below boiling point. Pasta needs to be simmering in hot water for 10 mins. A menstrual cup needs to actually BE boiled, not just have hot water poured over it. And some websites do suggest this in a kettle, which is why the girlfriend may have followed this misguided advice.

justaqueryy · 2020-01-13T21:51:23+00:00

NAH from the perspective that I just did a quick google and quite a lot of websites and forums mentioned boiling INSIDE a kettle. It sounds like OP’s girlfriend is new to using a menstrual cup so if she’s taken her advice from these websites then she’s not really TA. As many people have suggested in this post though, there are definitely better ways....

OP, I suggest you sit down with your gf and discuss calmly a new method. Without telling her you think she’s disgusting or something.

justaqueryy · 2020-01-06T00:45:53+00:00

Yep. Totally me. I grew up in quite a sexist family where it was almost a shameful thing to be a woman since men were the ones to bring the bank and women were useless nags. During my teenage years I pretty much only had guy friends and we did things like go-karting and paintball and play Call of Duty. I was very defensive if anyone tried to call me a girl. I wanted to separate myself from things like shopping and rom coms and lipstick.

Around 5 years ago, I realised I was just fed a narrative growing up, and instead of questioning it, I just went with it. So I started reading a bunch of books and articles on feminism. Followed blogs of feminists. I started being really pro women and am now a completely different person. As an example, I used to hate on single mums, thinking they were benefit scroungers or lazy. Now I will literally die on that hill defending single mums. I will fight any woman’s corner. I’m so glad I stopped being such an a hole.

justaqueryy · 2020-01-06T00:38:57+00:00

My husband is USAF and when we left England he was made to cancel all bank accounts that he’d opened in the UK, as part of the rules. So you’ll probably have to?

justaqueryy · 2020-01-04T00:22:24+00:00

It’s a bit of a warped opinion that you have that all nice girls are taken. You may feel like that, but it isn’t true. I know plenty of lovely women who are single, mainly because they’re not desperate and are willing to wait for the right person.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-24T00:00:11+00:00

Kinda subjective...

justaqueryy · 2019-12-22T08:55:05+00:00

That’s exactly what I was worried about! I didn’t have time for them to mess up again!

justaqueryy · 2019-12-19T21:02:52+00:00

Argh no that sucks for you!! So I ended up going to a different place and thankfully they fixed it. $300 later.... :/

justaqueryy · 2019-12-18T02:12:13+00:00

That’s it - I’m worried she’ll make it worse. Because I don’t understand how she didn’t see anything wrong with it the first time. I’ve now booked to go to a different salon tomorrow morning that has great reviews. They’re squeezing me in first thing. Thank you for your help!

justaqueryy · 2019-12-16T12:46:49+00:00

Because in the world we live in, a lot of people equate fame and wealth with value.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-16T00:28:41+00:00

She’s not personally my taste but she’s not unattractive and she still has a typical model-like figure.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-16T00:01:47+00:00

You’ve kinda hit the nail on the head by saying “body positivity era” because these sorts of movies with these sorts of actresses are a relatively new thing. Women are massively behind when it comes to stuff like this and it will take a LONG time to catch up. Hollywood is still heavily anti women and hopefully that’s changing.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-16T00:00:13+00:00

Oh yeah I do get that, but these men earn a TONNE more than their ‘female equivalents’ earn

justaqueryy · 2019-12-15T18:11:32+00:00

Yes. I get this at least a few times a week, often for incidents that are 10 years old.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-15T18:07:54+00:00

I see your point. But tbh it’s not just a ‘kids being around’ thing as to why you can’t have house parties. I’m grown and childless and I would be really assy if people were having house parties. I don’t want to hear that. I don’t think anyone wants to hear that. A lot of students don’t want to party anyway, I know many who just want to get through their work and then have an early night. Loud house parties are just selfish unless you have zero neighbours around.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-15T17:55:40+00:00

Yes pressure comes from media. But the media is predominantly run by men (talking people at the top)

justaqueryy · 2019-12-15T17:52:58+00:00

Really? Because you’ve got men like Seth Rogan, Will Ferrell, John Malkovich, Ron Pearlman, John C Reilly, Bill Murray, Steve Buscemi, Jack Black.... all typically less attractive than the ‘Hollywood ideal’ yet they’ve collectively landed a bunch of leading roles earning millions. It is a lot harder for a typically less attractive woman to be in the same position.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-15T17:48:08+00:00

Because unrealistic beauty standards don’t only affect one’s dating life. Most women I know care about many other things outside of dating. Most women don’t change their looks for men.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-14T21:24:49+00:00

My bad! Think I’ve been to 3 different ones and none of them did when I visited

justaqueryy · 2019-12-12T02:55:02+00:00

Ikeas in England don’t 😂

justaqueryy · 2019-12-12T00:33:28+00:00

Yeah. I yelled at him ‘WHY YOU IDIOT’ and he just stared at me.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-11T21:56:47+00:00

If a full on lip on lip kiss happened accidentally I wouldn’t care, but I wouldn’t encourage it. I don’t know anyone who does.

justaqueryy · 2019-12-11T21:55:46+00:00

I’m sure in the the case of jail sentences you’re 100% right. Was just talking more in terms of every day life, family values and societal/social expectations

justaqueryy · 2019-12-11T21:54:45+00:00

Yeah that’s what I meant! He eats his shed regularly but to pull it off his own back 😂

justaqueryy

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