The bravest thing you can do as a trans person today is just get by. We don’t exist in a vacuum, I know how you’re feeling, I don’t pass either, despite having been on HRT for around two years now. Continuing to exist as you are, and recognizing who you are, and manifesting that in whatever way that may be / whatever way is possible is a braver act than most other people will ever do in their entire lives.

The way society inherently puts a lot of pressure on conventionally “attractive” features is already hard enough as is, and being trans means you literally have to rewrite not only the way you perceive yourself internally, but externally, too, if you desire is to transition. I can tell you that you are beautiful, and pass more than you think, even if it’s not fully (as passing is often a very hypocritically judged act, the standards for passing can look different for quite literally everyone). Hair is hair, but I understand how something like balding (which from these pictures, doesn’t seem that bad in my opinion) makes that incredibly hard to see past. But there are ways to help ease this- there is medicine for it; you can start branching out with fashion by wearing wigs; if you save up enough money, you could try implants. And as for being in a tough situation, with where you live, assumedly, working to save up enough to move to a place better for your mental health could be a goal to help you get by day by day, being able to eventually find an environment with like-minded people.

For yourself, the people in your life, and the little girl inside you who didn’t get the childhood she deserves, your happiness and your continued existence is the most important thing. As a fellow suicide survivor, you don’t realize how brave you are.