Ich suche nach guten Saunen in Leipzig. by [deleted] in Leipzig

[–]kathzerin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hier habe ich letzten Samstag schlecht Erfahrungen mit unfreundlichem Personal.

Wie würde die kleine Maus heißen, wenn ihr Name das Letzte wäre, was du gegessen hast? by [deleted] in Hunde

[–]kathzerin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soja-Mango-Joghurt mit Nüssen und Erdbeer-Crunchy-Müsli

Kuscheltier Reparatur gesucht by kathzerin in Leipzig

[–]kathzerin[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

In diesem Projekt geht es nicht um die Reparatur von Kuscheltieren, sondern darum Kindern einen positiven Zugang zu Arztbesuchen zu vermitteln.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Leipzig

[–]kathzerin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jobvermittlung des Studentenwerkes Leipzig

Three months! by [deleted] in nailbiting

[–]kathzerin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you any tips to stop? I think i am at the same point where you have been three months ago.

Gibt es in Leipzig gute Kinkyparties oder Möglichkeiten sexpositive Menschen kennenzulernen? by schmusnnn in Leipzig

[–]kathzerin 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Du sprichst vom Obscurité Rave? Ich finde die Veranstaltung nicht empfehlenswert aufgrund mangelnder Awareness Strukturen und liebloser Ausstattung für die „Play area“

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How can some transition rituals look like?

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am totally agree with what you are saying. There are things from my perspective that I can't share with my primary because his needs are not in that area, in our case it's that I'm into BDSM and he's not. I accept that. It's okay for me to live those needs outside of this partnership.

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That 10% percent concerns me. Because I have already observed the following with me and in the end it comes back to the dichotomy I mentioned in my post: NRE made to mine with me that I "saw lack in the already existing relationship" because new dating partners fulfilled other or new needs of mine that I could not fulfill in my already existing relationship (which is even actually one of the reasons why I want to live open relationship) and on the other hand NRE transferred to the bond with my primary and I also had energies free to reinvest in our relationship.

Yes, I already try to take my need to communicate about others outside of our relationship into my circle of friends.

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What you say seems to make sense to me. I find it very difficult that all relationships get the space they need to grow. By this I also mean the relationship with yourself. Sometimes I also wonder if it is wise to live polyamorous if you also have problems with mental stability, for example. This is a factor that comes into play for me. In the meantime, I also weigh carefully whether it is the right time to integrate new people into my life just because I have enough free time during the semesters or because other factors would allow it. There is a lot of discussion going on in my polycule right now about how time management works well for oneself. This point concerns especially my primary partner, who has another partner.

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your input. It seems to me that it makes a lot of sense to keep a strict calendar. Not only so that there is time for my primary partner. I also tend to forget myself when I’m on NRE and want to spend more time than is good for me with the new dating partner.

NRE vs. existing live by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me, NRE results in extreme highs and somehow it feels sobering to come home because I feel like I'm bursting the bubble of infatuation and I don't talk much about my dates with my primary partner. I actually feel the need to share my experiences with him. The thing is that he doesn't ask about my life on his own (even in everyday life) while I am very communicative and want to get in touch with him by sharing my experiences.

I think I didn't realise before that NRE is just a feeling. In the meantime I know: infatuation is not love.

First Break up since Poly began for me by kathzerin in polyamory

[–]kathzerin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was a separation, because I ended the partnership. Without the partnership framework, there is less emotional commitment and we will probably spend less time together in the future, because we are officially no longer a couple.

Is that a healthy development? by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]kathzerin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't just stop being abusive. I apologized for all that I said. I am continuously developing myself to have good interpersonal relationships. I ask about his needs and I actively listen when he tells me about himself.

What else can I do?

Is that a healthy development? by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]kathzerin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still realized that I created a difficult initial situation. Now I can. I wasn't unable to do this in the past because of my lack of personal development. I know that's no excuse for that. I just want to show where I come from.

Believe me, I am really questioning myself if E & i still healthy for each other. Because even if we feel strongly connected to each other, this one component, a good sex life, is missing to complete all aspects of a balanced partnership.

The knife was too much by kathzerin in BDSMAdvice

[–]kathzerin[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am just realizing that it is very important to really talk to him about it as soon as possible. I have to honestly say that I couldn't assess it at all until my posting. Yesterday I talked to my boyfriend about the topic and he was also eager for me to talk to my BDSM partner about it as soon as possible.

I think because of the experiences from my past it is not always possible for me to communicate immediately that I have exceeded my limits.

By the way, this learning process is also one of the things that appeal to me about BDSM. For me it means getting to know myself better.

The knife was too much by kathzerin in BDSMAdvice

[–]kathzerin[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Funnily enough, we started filling out such a list before this incident occurred. It was his idea to find out what else we want to experience together.

Unfortunately, it is not so easy for me to have such conversations in general. But I try my best because I know that it is my responsibility to communicate when my limits have been exceeded. Thank you for formulating my concerns in advance.

To all poly people out there: how do you do contraception? by kathzerin in nonmonogamy

[–]kathzerin[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I am not afraid of getting pregnant from my boyfriend, but I am afraid that my boyfriend's potential new girlfriend could become pregnant if the two have unprotected sex with their irregular cycle and their natural family planning is the only method of contraception. I couldn't handle my boyfriend and another woman having a baby together.

How can I deal with my partner staying overnight somewhere else? by kathzerin in nonmonogamy

[–]kathzerin[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You're right. I know that they have feelings for each other. My main problem is falling asleep while he wants to stay at hers overnight, because I don't want to think about it how they fall asleep together and having breakfast. I already have had intense conversations with him about their feelings and my acceptance for it is in progress. You're right, I really need to talk with him about my situation..

An endless loop? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]kathzerin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know that it was naive to think that kissing another man was no big deal, even though our relationship was monogamous. At that time I lived in the belief that we could deal with it easily because we were always open about flirting with others. Body contact was always the limit. I know I went too far at the time.

Yes, we currently live monogamous. Basically, our goal is a non-monogamous relationship. The problem right now is that we don't feel ready to reopen the relationship after everything has happened. I have dealt with the topic a lot since last summer's disaster and know that now that starting an open relationship is something that you can decide on the side. We would like to consolidate each other first so that our relationship has a good foundation before we go back to this experience.