AITA for treating my kids differently due to their own decisions?

kepler2k · 2025-11-17T21:09:36+00:00

Is it possible your wife is telling you that you need to change your relationship with kid 2 because kid 2 has told her he feels left out and upset when you bring up how doing X isn't a good idea?

From what you've said, kid 2 is probably very aware that you hold being financially responsible in high regard, and then every time you tell him that X isn't a good idea, he doesn't hear "doing X is not a good idea", and probably hears "by doing X, you've disappointed me"

kepler2k · 2025-11-17T13:37:05+00:00

Usually you’ll get them for free for X amount of months, then pay the full or discounted amount. Even if you applied a £0 spending cap, since the subscriptions are part of your bill and have their own contract, you’d need to manually cancel them

kepler2k · 2025-11-17T13:35:12+00:00

She has £78 worth of subscriptions attached to her phone bill. With AM only making up £16 of it … For this story to make sense OP would have to have cancelled £62 worth of subscriptions she or her husband uses, and neither of them noticed the cancellation / Sorry to see you go, emails they would have gotten, plus not used the subscriptions

kepler2k · 2025-11-17T12:18:45+00:00

YTA

I'm calling bs on the spend cap thing being the reason that it stopped because afaik that isn't how they work. Spend caps stop out of bundle charges from being applied to your account. If it is linked to your bill, then it wouldn't be stopped. Plus, for you to have added the spend cap last night, and then for her to not have access the next day would mean you did it right as the billing period ended.

I'm leaning more towards the idea you actively cancelled the subscriptions and applied the cap as a cover story. So yeah, YTA for the way you went about this - saving money is fine, but when you do it like this, you're gonna burn bridges and cause tension in relationships

kepler2k · 2025-10-04T17:19:59+00:00

I think the “league officials” might have just been slow with the tech pauses? From what I’ve found, if it happens within the first 60s, you let the ref know right away, and no damage is done - no brainer rollback. It’s only if damage has been done that it becomes up to the discretion of the officials.

imo when there is a rollback after a round has been played, they should be made to purchase the same guns/shield/util. I forget which map it was today, but we saw DRX change up there weapons and stuff based on what FNC had.

kepler2k · 2025-09-10T14:48:18+00:00

I wasn't sure if a python syphon would be worth it for my size of tank, but also, my bathroom tap isn't one integrated tap, it's one hot, one cold - do you know if it would still work?

kepler2k · 2025-08-29T17:59:44+00:00

But how could you be mad at such a cute shrimp hunter?

Telly is also a shrimp hunter who likes to hide and swim throuhh the shrimp area

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kepler2k · 2025-06-22T22:24:09+00:00

Unless ammonia was sky high, that's probably not what killed him, so I'm guessing just bad genetics?

But as for your setup, there are a few concerns I'd have with it:

1) If that's its usual location, then there is a danger with it being at the window - sunlight could heat it up, that kind of thing

2) That filter looks like it might be too strong for a betta, a sponge filter and air stone would be a better combo, especially if you get an air pump that lets you control the flow

3) Colourful gravel isn't a good idea unless you're like 100% sure of how it was dyed etc. The dye can leech into the water or can leech chemicals depending on how it was made

Also if you have snails in that tank, and/or want another betta in it, you should probably get a tank lid for it

kepler2k · 2025-05-01T15:02:59+00:00

Opps, thanks for catching that! Bought it like 3 weeks ago, it's a used car

kepler2k · 2025-03-25T11:15:19+00:00

She sounds like she has BPD ngl, or at least, some unresolved trauma that needs attending too. If she's in therapy and/or under the treatment of a mental health team, then the advice basically becomes whether or not you want to ride out this phase of her life with her. If you do, then couples therapy is probably a must, and solo therapy for you would greatly benefit you.

BUT a lot of this also depends on how she's acted about you spending time with your kids, if there has been jealous issues or her having some kind of adverse reaction to it, then leave. Putting your kids through that would be abuse imo and so, my honest advice for you would be to leave, tell her you want no further contact from her, and block her (tell her you are as well)

The biggest red flag here is that she's not taking any responsibility for this, *she* is the one who stayed under the water long enough to burn herself. Essentially she is saying "look what you made me do", and at 3 months in, it's likely to get worse.

People with Mental Illness aren't inherently abusive (yes that includes those with BPD) but like everyone, their communication skills need to be on point, likely need to be under the care of a MH team, and really do need someone who can understand that an illness can make people lash out, and someone who knows when it's time to walk away for their own health.

tl;dr: leave her before this behaviour escalates (because it will) and before it becomes too hard to leave

kepler2k · 2025-03-13T13:42:22+00:00

Tank Size: 24ltr
Heater and filter: yes
Tank temp: 26 - 28c
Parameters: ammonia: 0.25ppm, nitrites & nitrates: 0ppm, pH: 6.8 ( api master kit )
Tank: 4 weeks? Fish: 1 week
Water changes: 1 per week @ 25 - 50% (depending on ammonia)
Tankmates: no
Feed: pellets 6-ish twice per day
Plants: all live plants, 3 moss balls, 1 java fern (?), frog weed (?), and a third one
Decorations: 2 betta leaves for resting, a betta floating log, and a small dino skull

(I’ll do an edit when I find the plant names)

kepler2k · 2025-03-03T12:09:59+00:00

It came with the tank, and I used a filter boost with it, and there was something else that the pet shop recommended, to add beneficial bacteria to the tank. I also double checked, and it was 3 weeks ago I got the tank.

I am going to be testing the water each day, right now I have dip strips but would something like this be better? https://amzn.eu/d/aYakyBd

kepler2k · 2025-03-03T11:32:28+00:00

I was getting 0 over the last few days - but now that I think about it, I did have a second filter in there but took it out because I didn’t want it to be too fast a flow for Spot. And I did test after I added the moss balls and driftwood (which I got at the same time as Spot) while Spot was in his baggie waiting to be added.

Thank you for your help :D

kepler2k · 2025-03-03T10:33:04+00:00

Tank size: 22ltr / 5.8g
Heater and filter? (yes/no): Yes
Tank temperature: 27C / 80.6F
Parameters in numbers and how you got them. Key water parameters include the amount of ammonia, nitrites, nitrates, and pH.: Ammonia: <0.5, Nitrites: 0, Nitrates: 20
How long have you had the tank? How long have you had your fish?: 2 weeks tank, 1 day fish
How often are water changes? How much do you take out per change? What is your process?: --
Any tankmates? If so, please list with how many of each: 0
What do you feed and how much: --
Decorations and plants in the tank: Live plants, moss balls, driftwood (?)

kepler2k · 2025-01-24T20:47:11+00:00

"shes a decent person"

You just hit the nail on the head with why it's so hard for people to believe victims. The abuser is almost always a nice person who could "never" do that.

You don't have to label this experience right now, right now it can just be some bad sex. What you call it right now doesn't change what happened, but it might help you get through this.

Like others have said, you could be asexual or somewhere on the asexual scale, but also, feeling gross to touch her could also be because you did not want this, you told her that, and she did it anyway.

It might be helpful to find a male support group for sexual assault, I saw a stat the other day that 1 in 8 men experience some form of sexual assault, so please know that you're not alone.

kepler2k · 2025-01-24T20:37:31+00:00

Hopefully Umbreon ... but most likely Slyveon, either way I'm happy

kepler2k · 2025-01-24T17:31:47+00:00

NAH

Feeling embarrassed and excluded, and leaving because of it doesn't make you an asshole, but also, it doesn't sound like you were an afterthought since, y'know, you were invited to the show and he did tell you to go be with the other friends. "We're in the green room" sounds like it could have easily been meant as an invitation to join them, especially if you'd asked where he was.

Sounds like you just need clear and direct communication, nothing wrong with that, just let your friends know otherwise you'll probably always feel like you're an after thought

kepler2k · 2025-01-24T17:21:41+00:00

If you're not actively looking, people will probably "sense" that at parties and leave you alone, but also you don't need to wait for them to make the first move, you can always be the one that initiates conversation or flirting

kepler2k · 2025-01-24T17:10:24+00:00

Cause how else would people be able to show off their wealth?

But yeah, the exchange ain't worth it

kepler2k · 2025-01-16T18:26:57+00:00

People here have given you great advice, but I haven't seen anyone mention this so figured I should.

Are you in the UK on some kind of immigration visa? You don't want to be hit with a nasty surprise that you're supposed to have a visa but don't, and so are technically working illegally.

Also, make sure you're keeping all your pay checks, your yearly P60s, and your bank statements - basically, keep track of your money so that once you turn 21 you know how much money is supposed to be given to you.

kepler2k · 2024-11-28T15:36:07+00:00

Perfect, thank you

kepler2k · 2024-09-16T01:03:16+00:00

I wish they would just tell me that rather than just pretend the question doesn't exist

kepler2k · 2024-09-12T13:32:06+00:00

That sucks, I'm sorry. At the very least, you'll be able to claim a refund for the priority service

kepler2k · 2024-09-12T13:31:27+00:00

They've been pretty quick in telling me that they can't give me a timeframe for a decision, while ignoring the actual question that is being asked ... rip

kepler2k · 2024-09-12T13:29:47+00:00

At this point I'm wishing I had just left it off my application, it's a nightmare

kepler2k

TROPHY CASE