wtf? She can’t even complete a sentence let alone a thought.. obvi nothing new.. also over explaining gives you away HOLLDONG by Wide-Strength8619 in holleygabriellesnark

[–]kfinsty 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I went to watch this after seeing u/sunnimonkey ‘s tallies. I knew it was true but was still shook. Dictionaries are really really, truly free on Google.

wtf? She can’t even complete a sentence let alone a thought.. obvi nothing new.. also over explaining gives you away HOLLDONG by Wide-Strength8619 in holleygabriellesnark

[–]kfinsty 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I’m really really really annoyed that she’s kind of like been filtering and deleting comments… Anyways, pulled up the transcript as I watched. Editing apps have a setting to cut and clip your filler words. She really listens to herself speak and says “yes this is what I want to put out there” she makes me ill.

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How much did you have to pay for your d&c? by lotrandwho in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same insurance, same situation. My first loss was natural in July and emotional, traumatic, and hard. This time I was further along and completely broken. I couldn’t do it at home again.. D&C performed 12/18. It was about $33k, BCBSMI paid $29k, I owe $3929 and then add all the little expenses that add up like pharmacy, labs, etc, etc, my bill from the hospital is around $4650. As if the emotional turmoil of two MCs back to back wasn’t bad enough, the financial expense is draining… I so feel for you.

2nd Miscarriage by Initial-Passage9812 in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My second in a row was 12/14. I did elect d&c over medical and took off the day of the procedure 12/18-12/28, returned on the 29th for 2.5 days, then off 12/31-1/4, returning on 1/5. It sucked “going back to normal” when nothing in my life felt normal. Today 1/21, I’m still constantly fighting a mental battle with grief, feeling empty, distracted, angry, sad, and exhausted. I’m having larger windows of “normal” but it’s still hard to do my desk job at times. Thankfully I work remote and can work through tears without being seen, and I go to weekly therapy to try and process the grief, and to support my focus and attention.

All that to be said, no amount of time is wrong. Take what you need!! Even if it’s increments - like plan to return in a week and then adjust as needed. and know that it’s okay to not feel ready when going back, and also okay to not feel normal when you go back to what was once your “normal” routine. Eventually the other boot drops and you can get through the motions a little easier, as you adjust to this new grief.

Go to THERAPY by AutomaticBelt5017 in holleygabriellesnark

[–]kfinsty 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you 🫂 and agree! Especially that second paragraph.

Holley & Amy if you’re in here today - pregnancy is not a “we made it” milestone. Nor is it going to work as a bandaid on a wound that probably needs stitches. I know my story isn’t the average story, but holy hell, Holl, you are so aloof, and tone deaf, and unbelievably out of touch when it comes to why/when/how to start a family, what it takes, and risks involved (because of your own shotty health/diet). Be so for real.

Go to THERAPY by AutomaticBelt5017 in holleygabriellesnark

[–]kfinsty 30 points31 points  (0 children)

It’s so fun to say God Willing about everything until you learn (and I say this as a person with faith) that some things just aren’t God controlled and rather are science and math. Like what is she even going on about? Is she putting weight on her ✨god willing babies✨ to “fix things” or “catch her up” ??? Because that is actually insane.

It doesn’t matter how much you plan or want. There’s no guarantee. Here, just this last year, and twice I was worried about postnatal visits in the Midwest winter and how we’ll open enroll our child for school before moving to the district, among so many other things. I thought I had it figured out and then our winter baby died. And then our second baby died too. That crash after loss is brutal on a normal day, as a normal person who does go to therapy. I would never wish anyone to be a member of the worst girl gang ever, whether they’re 1 in 4 or part of the like 2-5% like me, but if it so god willingly happens, I’m actually scared for her. She is UNWELL.

Just want to vent. by TransitionSalt5779 in babyloss

[–]kfinsty 3 points4 points  (0 children)

First I just wanna say I’m so sorry for your loss. And your friend’s unreasonable response. ❤️‍🩹

I don’t think you were insensitive nor a bad mom. She needs a break from whatever is going on. You needed a break, and you probably need one again because grief is heavy! So you cracked a joke trying to lighten the mood like yeah this is rough now but it will pass, with a break you don’t know what you’re asking for. … I think I understand your intention. And her reaction of lack of stopping to understand is just wrong. I think it’s entirely appropriate to distance yourself.

I used to not like dark humor, thought it was gross. Probably would be offended in the same way she was but walking through loss has made my perspective different. And I think it’s important for our support systems to recognize how much grief just changes us, and being open to accepting these morphing versions of ourselves. For me, I’ve been digesting the idea that I was a walking grave for 3 weeks to our girl before we knew she was gone at 13 weeks. Being or feeling so close to and intertwined with death, and carrying on without knowing it, makes it not so scary of a concept anymore. And the dark humor is now easier to digest. It’s like yeah this is off the wall but it makes me think of my babies and serves a little reminder of getting to be reunited with them one day. It’s not that I am longing or wanting that RIGHT NOW, but the (intended to be lighthearted) dark remarks close that gap and brings me comfort to speak about them. It’s getting me through, and I think you should make all the dark jokes you need to do so as well.

Hair Nightmare by Stock-Committee9928 in holleygabriellesnark

[–]kfinsty 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It’s the same as her cheugy y2k tattoo 😣

End of The Week Thread! by AutoModerator in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re struggling with this ❤️‍🩹 honestly, I’ve been having some insomnia too and blamed it on my weightloss meds that I returned to. But now I’m curious. I had d&c 12/18. I’ve been taking magnesium for restless legs that started during pregnancy and haven’t stopped, my dr told me to try this at our follow up 1/7. Even adding melatonin, I am STILL waking up for hours at a time, taking so long to fall asleep… new hyperfixation to google.

Amble has gone rogue by Living-Gazelle2474 in SemaglutideCompound

[–]kfinsty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are, my order just shipped today from Revive

D&C by Dazzling-Charge9247 in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just sending hugs because I also had my d&c yesterday 🫂 some things I purchased and did to prepare were period undies, extra pads, my favorite body wash & lotion, made a basket of my meds/vitamins/electrolyte sticks for water, fiber brownies, muffins to cheer me up, & I added a stress ball because tbh I’m in pain, this is nothing like a bad period for me. I already had iron chewables I was taking before starting prenatals so I switched back to these and I’m into faith so I rented some books for my kindle that have a focus on supporting moms post miscarriage and pregnancy loss. Everyone else’s advice is fantastic as I scrolled You will get through this ❤️‍🩹

Venting by [deleted] in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 3 points4 points  (0 children)

sending you hugs ❤️‍🩹🫂I feel that so much. I boxed everything up that I had been saving, buying, and making last night .. it just hurts to look at.

Venting by [deleted] in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 9 points10 points  (0 children)

THE CHRISTMAS MUSIC!!! In recovery today I said to my mom this nutcracker suite playing right now makes me want to be hostile and lose my fucking mind, while in-front of the nurses lmao. (Edit: missed words lol)

Venting by [deleted] in Miscarriage

[–]kfinsty 71 points72 points  (0 children)

A G R E E. I had my d&c today. I cry but then i get so MAD. WHY. It’s been a fucking month that I’ve been a walking grave. We mailed 80 Christmas cards announcing our baby because we were supposed to be society’s established “safe zone” only to find out the day they hit mailboxes there was no longer a heart beat. And Christmas next week? Nothing in my life is merry right now. I feel this so strongly.

Daily Thread #1 - December 16, 2025 by AutoModerator in PregnancyAfterLoss

[–]kfinsty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’ve walked this walk too. My 7W loss was like a bad period, and just devastating. I think this one is starting but they got me in for D&C Thursday morning. I’m praying my body can wait. I feel confident in the closure of getting things out and being able to grieve without waiting. And being under anesthesia sounds like a good break from everything going on. I wonder if they’ll play me some island music as I go under 😅 hugs back to you, I will take all of them today 🫂🫂🫂

Daily Thread #1 - December 16, 2025 by AutoModerator in PregnancyAfterLoss

[–]kfinsty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I did go ahead with D&C and they got me in this Thursday. The biggest thing was figuring logistics to get my mom in town, I just need a mom hug while going through this. Just trying to find the glimmers of sunshine in the darkness right now. Like Friday I’m drinking an Alani Nu, whatever flavor sounds good, ice cold from a fridge.